Soor Plooms (2026)

10/01/2018

P**p to Pate

We’ve finally made a top loop in the food chain, an
almost closed circle at the top. It’s now cheaper to
reprocess our bodily waste into reasonable priced,
nutritious food for the masses, just add ketchup.
(You don’t want to know what that’s made from)

But of course, this method of P2P is for the plebs with
no sophistication or maturity to their pallet.

The serious foodies go to the poop-up restaurants.
In these trendy restaurants they do all the processing on
site, and they provide a menu of where the person came
from, the strict diet they have been kept on and in some
cases for the more ethically minded, how it’s helped the
community they came from.

The newest edition is “The Adonis” where they have
gathered the best of the male modelling world and had
them eating lean proteins, strong greens and drink extra virgin olive oil from the hills of a small Spanish village, where the water provided to the olive grove is also the water consumed by them. They train for 8 hours a day, in full view of the dinners, n**e and oiled.

Divine.

09/01/2018

The Artificial Soul. Part II

Now it has been envisioned, now it has been
created, so now it is sold.

What value does a soul have? In everyday life no one
really knows and after death it’s anyone’s guess.

By now you would have thought we’d figured it out
undisputed, but no. For that exact reason a soul can now
be sold legally, where there’s a will.

Hey, pal. I know a guy. I heard you were down on your luck
recently, it happens to the best of us, man. So I’ve
spoken to my guy and he’s willing to help you out. I
mean, what are you using your soul for anyway? You’ll
be given an artificial one and a big wad of cash, no
questions asked. It’ll keep your head above water.

A warning though, get your soul back in three years or it will
never come back the same way. It comes back as a
second shadow, one you can see in the dark. I’m not
sure what he does with the souls but there’s only so
much a soul can take outside of the body.

Also, obvious, but try not to die with out it, just bad
joojoo. You don’t want to see what happens.

I wish I hadn’t.

But, Hey! Money, right?

09/01/2018

The Artificial Soul. Part I

I shall not be discussing the existence and definition of a
soul, some definitions would render this piece
impossible. Let’s consider that there is one and it has been defined and it can now be recreated.

A soul was meant to be something beyond science
something that was a inherent feeling and a comfort knowing
that a soul would continue to exist beyond this fleshy prison. Our feelings were proven right, but wee're not happy
about it. We wanted something that couldn’t be proved. There would be no metaphysical philosophy of it's existence, of something that was our sacred hope of immortality. A soul can now be recreated on a whim. What is a humans soul worth now?

For the creatures that now house this artificial soul,
what does life mean to them?
It means everything to them. Before, they were 'alive', but now there’s more. New feelings sprung out of this artificial soul, new hopes and ambitions, and that ever distinct
sparkle in the eyes, it’s now pixelated.

Is there such a strong distinction between the grown
and the created soul? Does one have more value?

07/12/2017

PRIMAL INCENTIVE

Banning of advertising, taxation, education, privatised
NHS, a culture of personal health, fitness programmes,
weight watches, glossy magazines fat shaming and let’s
not forget your mother when you come back for a meal.

None of these things have worked in reducing the
incredible obesity rates through out the world. So we
went back to the roots. Why do people love constantly
eating fatty, sugary, salty, high calorie foods? Because
we have been hard-wired to love it, essentially, because
it tastes fu***ng good.

We went to GM produce, we falsified flavours and we put
drugs in the fruit. Now an apple tastes like fu***ng
he**in and cabbage is a form of coke. At least our brain
thinks it is, we have no other side effects other than
great skin, healthy livers and a crippling addiction to
blueberries. “Super fruits” got out of hand, They become
a back alley transaction, Marks and Sparks we’re a
dealers paradise. We had to close Waitrose.

“Hey...Hey...Alright, mate. I’m glad you stopped it means
you’re a real gentleman, you know all these other guys
just walk on by telling me to get lost but you didn’t.
Cutting a long story short, I’m short of a vitamin and
could really use some change for some Acai berries, you
got some, mate?”

01/12/2017

FENCED IN FOOD

The wold has taken a grim turn with communications
and everyone agreed that if we couldn’t get along we
wouldn’t talk anymore.

Countries now support themselves with the food that
they can produce, exclusively. Because of our previously
wide communications we had seed banks of every living
crop on the planet so we are still able to cultivate
anything we wish but space is an issue.

Population is now more evenly distributed, in certain
countries, the ratio of population density vs space has balanced as people head back to the land and farm for
themselves becoming self sufficient and selling back
produce to the state.

In others the opposite. In order to have enough farm
land for it’s cherished large population giant structures
in a single city was built, Arks. Which hold around a
million persons per Ark, each with it’s own family of
representatives guiding everyone.

Obesity is now immoral and the equivalent of adultery
but each Ark treats this differently year to year
according to the yield, as it does with it’s pregnancy rates,
but it’s not immoral to have a child, having more than
two is a grey area.

30/11/2017

FANCY ANTSY

Insects are now the biggest and most ethical source of
protein on the planet. Traditional Livestock are kept for
‘Taste the Difference’ ranges and for those who can
afford to bathe in champagne.

Insects are being huffed down by the callused fists of
Danish Blue-esque body builders realising they could
get “hench”in just 6 weeks, after Men’s Health did an
article promoting the benefits of ingesting insects
earlier this year.

They are being nibbled, caressingly chomped and
twiddled on the end of silver forks in the fanciest parts
of Mayfair. Poshos claiming the rarest and most delectable
selection that Entomology could provide and boasting,
"You won't have even seen this bug before in your life and
now you’ll be eating its golden leafed wings."

Women’s magazines were the first to pioneer the eating
of insects with promotions boiling down to, “We’ve
swallowed a lot worse things, ammaright girls?!”

Only Holland & Barrett really pushed the Green agenda of
eating insects. No one cared.

17/11/2017

HERITAGE MEATS

We know that biodiversity in agricultural farming is
suffering and small steps are being made to encourage
the wildlife back into interacting with farmland.

But what of the produce itself? There’s a large number
of different Bovine, Swine and Poultry occurring. And
their numbers are booming because they are so well
managed. So what if we managed each and every
animal, for profit. Conservative Capitalism.

If the law demanded enough ethical treatment of
animals, that the majority of pro-active ethical
carnivorous agreed that it was the best way to farm
livestock then that could extend to every species, in very
uniquely characterised situations.

Controlled habitats with wild space for those that
co-inhabit with the farmed animal. Biodiversity on the
lands would increase and with the countless different
species each would harbour it own unique biosphere of;
flora, fauna and wildlife.

It may arise that certain insects from certain farms work
well against other pests that destroy arable farming
eliminating the need for pesticides.

Could managers be the future?

14/11/2017

VIVA VEGANISM
The world is now vegan.
Well the 99% of the world who can no longer afford meat
since animals became so scarce, in a state of constant
endangerment and protection they’re now worth more
than their weight in gold.

The revelation in Autumn 2018; since the
1970’s the worlds population of animals had halved.
Not a single species, all of them, halved.
The equivalent of the black death for the animal race.

In the following wake, people started to panic buy meat
knowing it would soon be an unreachable luxury.
The demand became so great that the farming industry
buckled under the pressure and could no longer afford
the feed for their livestock, it had been exhausted.

Due to a number of factors, the biggest finger pointing
towards the last three summers being the driest on
history and the amount of water required to keep a
healthy farm was dangerously below what was available.

Space had run out and our animal welfare ethics had
risen up and passed legislation banning factory farming,
leaving the meat industry with little option.

Our skin looks great.

09/11/2017

MOLECULES OF FOOD

We’re going into the world of TV magic for inspiration
queue the wavy hazy lines transition and place ourselves
on the USS Enterprise under Captain Picard.

He fancies some Earl Grey Tea and strides handsomely
towards the food synthesiser and stiffly commands it
into existence within a white china cup.

This fictional machine presumably would work by
constructing the atoms in position and in an order that it
is a replica of Earl Tea in a white china cup.

Someone would have to programme those molecules to
be such a flavour, to resembles tea and china. Thus in
theory they could also programme new flavours and
textures of food that haven’t existed before.

Glowing edible crystals,that refract every colour in the
spectrum in it’s casing, biting down, the light escapes,
bursting into the room around you and the crumbs float
up in front of your eyes and twinkle before vanishing.

An outstanding dining experience where chefs are those
with the greatest imagination and a mastering
molecular science and the structures that best reflect
the human palate.

07/11/2017

TRADEABLE HOURS
Academics of Science!
Of Architecture!
Of Design!
Of Medicine!
Your sleepless nights working killing you softly?
Exhausted from keeping the world spinning and the
inspiring the hearts of the masses? Your days are at an
end, and not by the overly thought method of su***de.
You can now buy Xleep by the hour! We extract hours of
sleep from people who wish to sell their extra hours.
Think of it as a surplus to be sold on to you.
We instil the purest deepest sleep (REM) into a
delightful, aromatic tea, of fennel and mint not to
mention the Taste Gold award in 2052.
So when that big deadline is coming up and your boss is
breathing down your neck and there’s just no other way,
for a mere £30 you can purchase an hour of Xleep.
You can carry on working for weeks at a time with
minimal mental side effects!
Not to be used irresponsibly, know your limits.
Overuse causes memory loss, irritable optimism and
extreme cases slurring and severe apathy.

01/11/2017

IN DOUBLE-BLIND TESTING WE TRUST

Religion is decreasing across the developed world.
One bold country has made the first step to a new
enlightenment and declared itself as Atheistic.

Free religion is still practiced but the country does not
align itself in any direction.
Human Law and Rationalism is the ruling power over
Religious Rights, such as Halal and Kosher, refusal of
essential medical care and unethical practices done
under the His name, not exclusively but including FGM
and known paedophilia.

Nothing much changes.

A single developed country does not make a difference
to the rest of the religious world, other than creating a
haven for those trying to escape persecution in heavily
religious countries and aggravating them in doing so.

Would it spur pride in the country? To develop a new set
of ethics to which it’s citizens may lead their life, fulfilled
and with a greater purpose in their logic.

Probably not.

31/10/2017

THE ‘KNOW-IT-ALL’ CHIP

The future human will be able to access the
accumulative knowledge of all recorded documents by
simply asking themselves the question.

The greatest attribute of a person will be asking the correct question and scientific discovery adding to the chips knowledge. Exploratory and discovery will be
the human races prime concern.

Unfortunately short term memory has taken a massive
hit and creativity has plummeted due to what would
usually be a matter of connecting dots, it is quickly
forgotten and never utilised.

They’ll be able to call upon creative process of human
history, but it will be logicically approached. An example
will be language; grammatically, rhythmically perfect
but the subject wont be contemporary for the time.

It will be a struggle to create anything original, everything will be fit to purpose.

They will be efficient.

Creativity will be painful, physically.

//HMM, WHAT TO WEAR... GREY JUMP SUIT OR GREY JUMP SUIT?

Soor Plooms

10/01/2018

09/01/2018

09/01/2018

07/12/2017

01/12/2017

30/11/2017

17/11/2017

14/11/2017

09/11/2017

07/11/2017

01/11/2017

31/10/2017

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