22/05/2019
That face = I got my giggle back💕 keep reading to find out how! 👇
I am really not sure I will ever forget it really - my 'line in the sand' moment.
There were a million and one things that could have been my tipping point, in this endless existence of almost constant chaos and stress that I was living in.
I was working as a social worker and also teaching sometimes in the district.
It wasn't really the work itself - I enjoyed being able to truly impact others lives in a positive way, and I excelled in this area particularly. 💫
I didn't even mind the hours, the on-call emergencies and late night visits, or any of that.
I knew it made a difference and was important, and I worked passionately.
I could also tell you all of the moments it could have been - the moments maybe it should have been, as terrifying as they were.
But it was this:
It took away my joy. 🥺
A little more than a month after I had started at the local office and had gotten my cubicle all set up, a woman who had been working as an adult services social worker for more than 30 years peaked into my office and pointed.
She had gestured to a 'giggle' magnet in crystal ocean blue I had placed on the side of my filing cabinet and said " I love that! And what I love even more than that is that you embody it." 😊
She went on to say that she noticed that no matter how things went (and boy would they get pretty dark around there), I always had a warm smile for everyone, and that I brought shine out in people.
Then she, a little sternly, said “keep that - keep your giggle, because you'll need it."
More than two years went by......
There were some really great moments - excellent cases, friendships made, families reunited, children made safe and whole again. 🥰
Income that was secure and a job that had enough variety in it I was sure to never get bored. But there was so much that I don't even have words for.
But again, I could handle all of it - and do it passionately, with kindness, with strength, and justly.
Not with joy though- and not with freedom - something I knew deep down in my soul was there, somewhere in tangible form just waiting to be discovered. 🙌
The same woman, who had poked her head in many times over the last couple of years, did again.
This time was different though.
She edged her way in and sat on the corner of my desk, looking down at me, establishing right away that this was no ordinary drop-in to say hello.
“You can't do this anymore," she said.
She once again pointed at the ocean blue magnet that was still exactly where it had been all that time. 👀
I had never moved it, because I would catch her glancing at it when she would walk by often, shake her head and giggle herself a little. It served a purpose. Just like my smiles.
She said, "Your giggle is gone Toni - and that is not acceptable." 🧐
THAT made me look, and look deeper - not the threats, or the constant on-call, or the broken bones, screaming parents, stressed out co-workers looking to bicker 24/7.
Not the time taken from my daughter, or the fact that since all my energy was spent with others each day in an intense way, I barley had anything left to give to her when I came home.
THAT was my wake-up call. 👁
It made me look deep enough that I saw that I had allowed my joy to be stripped from me - and something you do not have, you cannot give!
THAT simply was not acceptable to me.
I could not continue to allow myself to create and stay in circumstances that took away my joy. Period.
When I looked at other routes to take - other jobs or careers to pursue that were traditional to and in line with 'what I should be doing' I couldn't see the heart in it.
Or the freedom.
Or the joy!
I found my answer here! ✨
With a click.
Inside a community.
A Community of Online Entrepreneurs!💜
P.S. ~ If you are still with me, I know this is really long but I just needed to get it out again, let it flow, feel it again!
Thank you!!!🙏
P.P.S. And if you are STILL with me, this resonated somewhere!
Which means you likely are searching for something once lost! 👀
Let’s find out what that is!
Join me this week inside CEO Movement! 💃
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Where’s your giggle? 😄
