Church in the shower thoughts.

19/08/2025

I think we all wish we could change the world at the moment.

Well, we can. One kind thing at a time. Stick this song on full blast and have a dance. You’ll feel better, promise.

Change the World

Song by Eric Clapton

17/08/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

Losing someone you love is always awful. The void that is left behind often feels physical. Debilitating.

Losing someone you love through su***de tho, that leaves a mental anguish unlike any other. Su***de has been a very unwelcome presence in my life, having lost two friends at a young age through it.

I don’t have many “triggers” that elicit extreme emotional responses, but I would say that hearing the word su***de is one. No matter how prepared I am, the rush of adrenaline that comes is always unexpected. Over the years I have looked into this deeply. Therapy helped me with this response, and now, fortunately I understand it. It has lost some of the sting it once had.

I delved into resources available to help me understand why these people felt the need to stop their lives so abruptly. It’s often easier to understand if a note has been left, but oh so often that is not the case.

My conclusions have always been the same. They weren’t in their right mind. It wasn’t them at that moment. They weren’t scared of death.

They weren’t scared of death. What a sentence, but what a comfort it should be to those of us left behind.

Many mainstream faiths would have you believe that taking your own life will leave you in a state of purgatory, an endless in between. I’d argue that most of the victims are already there in life. God would never punish the broken, instead would wrap them up in all the love they have ever created and be at peace. This I’m sure of. Until the resurrection, That is heaven.

Matthew 11-28
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest”

27/04/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

Due to the stars being in alignment, and a pinch of emotional necessity, I’m at my parents. Home. Yes, I have many. Each as important as the other.

The time here has been permeated by the word “change”.. Much like a pencil drawing filled with colour, the lead being the change ,has been there, essential for the shape. The picture however still showing the familiar.

So many fabulously timed things have happened. I sat with my Pa on Saturday watching a Paul Simon documentary on the album “Graceland”. That album is seminal to my upbringing, and sitting there watching the history of the album whilst chatting to my father is a memory I shall have, and cherish forever.

I also had the most fabulous experience with my Ma. After a fabulous (if I do say so myself) roast we were cleaning up the kitchen. I turned on radio two, and “a big night at the musicals” was on. More specifically, “all that jazz” was playing. Seeing my mother move (rather fabulously) to the music was wonderful. It also made me acutely aware of how lucky I am, in soo many ways, to have their evolved thinking so integral to my being.

They keep taking about being old.. I can’t disagree, as if I’m feeling it, then it’s more than fair for them to be also I guess. At first, I didn’t like it, the conversations of being old that is, but as the weekend has gone by I realise that it’s a conversation that needs to happen. Nothing stays the same forever and we need to recognise change in order to facilitate the new obstacles and new adventures it sets out for us. Whatever situation is changing, it’s always going to feel uneasy. We aren’t good with uncertainty. What always happens however is that we find ourselves in the new normal, and we will get used to that like it or not.

I needed this time with them. I’ve been a bit fragile with all the change happening around us, and I suspect more to come. They have as ever, provided the stability I needed to have a ponder as to what the future will bring. Whatever it brings, there will be an abundance of love.

1 Corinthians 14:33 “For God is not a God of disorder but of peace—as in all the congregations of the Lord’s people.”

20/04/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

Happy Easter. He is risen.

The meaning of life, is simply to live.

You are loved.

Adonai, Maranatha.

13/04/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and Wisdom to know the difference.”

-The serenity prayer.

Serenity- The state of being calm, peaceful and untroubled.

When was the last time you felt serene? I adore the serenity prayer, it stays with me often being put forward by my conscience on the harder days of life. It’s the first sentence that I find the most difficult. The courage to change the things can usually be mustered once I’ve sat down and had a damn good think about things. Accepting there aren’t things I can change tho? Well, that bit is nothing short of tough.

I’m sitting writing this staring at 4 different bowls of cat food, all with different varieties of food for my darling fur-child Sookie. I say child, she is soon to be sixteen and in cat years, that makes her eighty. She has stopped eating as much over the last few months, loosing over a quarter of her body weight. We have had her checked out, and there is no reason for it at all. She just doesn’t want it. The most annoying part tho, is she’s constantly telling us that she is hungry. This has meant that we have bought what feels like every type of food available to tickle her tastebuds. Nothing is working. At best she will graze. Anything we do next to investigate the reasons for her behaviour will result in a not very happy cat, and at the moment she’s happy.

Accepting things you cannot change is hard. What you want verses what you get. Global events, ageing in all its forms and relationship changes being as intrinsic to life as they are. What helps makes these things palatable however is knowing you have done everything you can.

Now, I’m off to apply my anti-aging cream, buy cat food and try and be serene….

Love, ###

Matthew 5:5
Blessed are the peaceful, for they shall inherit the earth.

06/04/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

Good morning you lovely lot.

I have been in the garden a lot this week. Not doing a lot, just staring at the majesty of my plants coming back to life in the bright, warm weather.

Nature has always been intrinsically linked to my relationship with the divine, I see it as one and the same. Throw in the composting stage, and you could call it my own personal trinity. I am in awe of natures ability to grow out of nothing other than soil and water, and yes, I get the science, but oh how magical it is. I wish that I could grow new bits by just sitting in the sun and eating.. Well, I guess I can around the middle.

It amazes me how we can create a little slice of paradise in our own back gardens, and not a small reminder to nourish what you can in your own life. The world is a big place, but one garden at a time can have a huge impact.

All the love,

Isaiah 61:11
For as the soil makes the sprout come up and a garden causes seeds to grow, so the Sovereign LORD will make righteousness and praise spring up before all nations.

30/03/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

Wishing you all a peaceful and happy Mother’s Day.

A family favourite psalm, chosen for my Ma. Whenever I read it I think of all the similarities between God and a mother.

Thank you.

Psalm 139:1-12

1. You have searched me, Lord, and you know me.
2. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
4. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely.
5. You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me.
6. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
7. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?
8. If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.

23/03/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

Equality and equity;

“Equality means each individual or group of people is given the same resources or opportunities. Equity recognizes that each person has different circumstances and allocates the exact resources and opportunities needed to reach an equal outcome.”

These words sometimes make sense, other times they make my mind explode. As I take in the last few weeks media, my mind is trying to balance its viewpoints. I strongly believe that everyone should be treated equally. The problem with that however, is that the world is not a fair place, It was never promised to be. Our physical differences remind us of that constantly.

It’s how we approach these physical differences that make life fascinating to observe. I am lucky that my physical being is very privileged, I’m a white male for example. I am still tho, committed to trying to understand the impact of what not having that privilege would be like.

James 2:8-9;
If you really keep the royal law found in Scripture, “Love your neighbor as yourself,” you are doing right.
But if you show favoritism, you sin and are convicted by the law as lawbreakers.

16/03/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

Artificial intelligence. You can’t go through a day without it influencing you in some way or other.

I have yet to make my mind up about the usage of AI in everyday life. It is an incredibly powerful tool that is most certainly to be respected and used, but I can’t help but despise it when it’s used in a creative sense.

I am lucky to have a job that will never be overtaken by anything that isn’t human. We are more likely to have shaved heads and wear 3D printed wigs before a robot can assess the delicate intricacies of an individuals hair diversities and needs.

A friend told me of her experience with Job applications. They are rife with AI generated CVs, all shiny and perfectly laid out. At first she was delighted by the standard of applicants when advertising for a job in her parlour. When they decided to meet the shortlisted few however, things went awry. Communication skills are essential in that line of work, and judging by the applications had assumed these would be in abundance after reading them. Sadly not. The people met bore little similarities to their expected charisma. It was, in a way dishonest.

So where does it help in that respect? Will I now have to meet every person who applies for a job for a true representation? I’m baffled. Maybe An essential “AI” watermark on everything that has used it should become mandatory.

I love humans and our idioms. Who knows, once AI learns to be gently sarcastic, I might start to like it.

Proverbs 4:24;
“Put away from you crooked speech, and put devious talk far from you.”

09/03/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

I’ve been posting less regularly for quite a while now. At first I thought it was because I had run out of things to say, or that I was finding it hard to balance my theological musings with my point of view. I am now realising that neither were true, and that I was completely overwhelmed by what has been happening in the world that I had choice paralysis in what to muse about.

Today marks a five year anniversary since the first Covid lockdown. I can’t believe that such time has gone by. During the pandemic, life was simpler. We had fewer options in almost every aspect of our lives. Our focus was kept on the here-and-now and not on the what-will. It is no wonder that everyone has been experiencing overwhelming feelings.

We were promised a more empathetic world, a shared trauma acting as a suture to a fractured globe.

I really believe that the world is a much kinder place to live post pandemic, but one that is much more fragile, more defensive in wanting to defend its localised status-quo’s.

Let’s spread the love my darlings. Be wary of the wolves in sheep’s clothing using the words of our holy books to create division. It’s ok to be diverse, but never divided.

Proverbs 10:29
“The way of the LORD is a refuge for the blameless, but it is the ruin of those who do evil.”

28/02/2025

26/01/2025

Church in the shower thoughts.

There is a small chance this week that you saw or heard of Bishop Mariann Budde. She gave a sermon in which she upheld some very basic human and christian ethics. President Trump didn’t like it.

For many of my peers, it’s not the first time we had heard or seen Bishop Budde. In 1998 a young man called Matthew Shepard was brutally attacked and subsequently died. The motive of the killing was his sexuality. His parents held on to his ashes for 20 years in fear that any marked grave would be targeted and vandalised. in 2018 Budde asked his parents if the would like the ashes to be laid within the cathedral. Protected and visited by many, his legacy lives on forever.

Trump has used Christianity to a much bigger extent than his predecessors to get his shoe in the Whitehouse door. He knew by weilding the bible he could empower the white-Jesus following - right wing - uneducated xenophobic masses of middle America into believing that he was chosen by god to run the country.

Luckily, there are more types of Christian’s out there, and now is a time to be loud and proud about it.

Bishop Budde is part of the Episcopal Church. For readers interest, that is also who my mum is affiliated with. No surprise then that if I was to choose a branch of Christianity, it would be this.

I’ve said it before, and will say it many times more; if jesus returned, or had arrived here in current times, he would be seen as a liberal and branded as a left wing rebel.

Be more like Jesus.

“He was a radical, a revolutionary, yet tender and kind and loving. He was doing things completely against the rules of the day. He was a mix of justice, kindness, judgment and grace.”
- Brett McCracken