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Ageless Expat

More than 4 decades in Thailand and still loving it.

31/12/2025

Happy New Year from Chiang Rai, Thailand. I am working on my resolutions. How about you?

16/12/2025

I just finished a four day fast. Technically about ninety hours, which makes it the longest one I have done. The fourth night’s sleep was not great, but overall it went smoothly, and I noticed a real decrease in joint pain, probably from reduced inflammation.

I had hoped to rehab my hip this year. I have gotten stronger, but a recent MRI confirmed that there is a genuine joint issue. At this point in life, I do not see a realistic path back to an athletic outdoor life, even with a hip replacement. The pain is manageable, so for now I have decided to keep doing what I am doing in the gym and accept that my hiking days are likely behind me.

That kind of acceptance seems to be showing up in other areas too, less as resignation and more as a settling into what is actually there, the reality of my life.

When my old computer failed, I lost a large part of my photo archive. Everything else had been backed up, but not the photos. Being without a computer for a couple of weeks while it was unsuccessfully repaired, and then waiting for a new one to arrive, turned out to be unexpectedly revealing. It made me question what I actually get out of being online, and what I do not.

Some people have expressed concern about my increasing tendency to retreat into a smaller, quieter world. Others warn me about AI, or solitude, or disengagement. I understand the concern, but I do not feel genuinely lost. I feel like I am adjusting.

My wife is in a very active phase of her life right now, and I would not dream of asking her to slow down to match my pace. This is just another season of being together differently, and I want her to keep doing what she loves while she can.

There are social events coming up, Christmas gatherings and group meals, and I will go. I always do. But I have learned something about myself over the years. I am far better one on one. Big groups tend to leave me drained, not enriched. Knowing that does not make me less social. It just makes me more honest about where my energy actually lives.

11/12/2025

It surprised me to notice that nearly two months have passed since I last posted. I didn’t make a decision to step away. It just happened. Part of it was going without a computer for a couple of weeks, but the larger part was simply losing the impulse to share anything here.

What I’ve been sitting with lately is how little I miss it. I keep asking myself what I’m actually looking for when I post. The honest answer is unclear. I find more satisfying conversation in unexpected places now. A quiet exchange with one of the new AI platforms often holds more substance than most online interactions. It’s strange, but it’s the truth.

Meanwhile life keeps moving in its own steady way. I finally committed to a regular gym routine, and the rhythm of going to town three days a week has been grounding. It makes the days at home feel deeper somehow, like I can actually settle into my own space.

There’s no shortage of things I could talk about. I just haven’t felt the pull to turn my life into posts. Maybe that will return, maybe it won’t. Right now I’m paying attention to the quieter signals—the ones that tell me where my interest actually lives, not where I think it should be.

19/10/2025

So while she was playing in the mountains I had to endure a Thai massage. The sacrifices I make for love. ❤️

19/10/2025

Getting an early start.

18/10/2025

It’s a hard life. While she is out running 30km in the mountains I am stuck here.

16/10/2025

Driving home this afternoon, I found myself heading straight toward a dark, restless wall of rain, the horizon flashing with distant lightning. Just before the long bridge over the wetlands, this cloud caught my eye—massive, alive, and full of motion. I pulled off, grabbed my iPhone, and caught this image in that strange, breathless pause before the storm broke. For a moment, the world seemed to hover between calm and chaos, waiting to exhale.

15/10/2025

A New Experience After All These Years

I thought I had seen everything Thailand had to offer after all these years — but last weekend reminded me otherwise.

My wife and I attended the funeral of a dear friend’s mother in Chiang Mai. Our friendship began in Bangkok more than twenty years ago, and it continued even after we moved to Chiang Rai eighteen years ago. She was single when we met, and over the years we watched her career grow, saw her get married, and eventually have children later in life. Life carried her between cities, and months would sometimes pass without meeting, but we stayed in touch — a quiet thread of connection that never quite loosened.

This was a city funeral, more formal and restrained than the village ceremonies I’ve known. Yet somehow, we found ourselves not just attending but taking part.

I was asked to begin the ceremony by turning on the ceremonial lights before a Buddha image — a gesture marking the start of the proceedings and honoring the life that had passed. Later, we offered robes to the monks, placed flowers before the casket, and stood among a small circle of close friends at the cremation.

I don’t follow any particular religion these days, but I felt deeply honored to be included. For me, it was simply an act of respect — for our friend, her family, and the life that had come full circle.

Even as the only farang, I didn’t feel out of place. After so many years here, I seem to have settled into a space that isn’t really Thai or Western — just my own way of belonging.

When the ceremony ended, there were no speeches or long goodbyes. Just quiet embraces before everyone drifted away in separate cars.

On the long drive home, my wife and I talked about what it meant to be invited into such an intimate moment — the kind of inclusion that can’t be asked for, only given. It left us both quietly moved. It reminded us again that friendship doesn’t always speak; sometimes, it simply stands beside you when words have nothing left to add.

07/10/2025

Driving home today I found myself caught between earth and sky. To my left, a cliff face rising sheer, ancient and unmoving. To my right, clouds swelling with light and texture, alive in their becoming—expanding outward, not yet surrendering to rain.

There is a strange comfort in moments like this. They remind me that we are both small and essential—brief lives held within something vast and timeless. In the second photo, look closely at the bottom left corner. A solitary man stands in the field at the base of the cliff. Against the immensity of rock and cloud he is almost invisible, yet his presence gives meaning to the scale. Without him, the measure of the moment would be lost.

05/10/2025

I am very proud of my wife for taking on this challenge. After a DNF last year she was determined to come back and finish this year. She did a little bit better than just finishing.

04/10/2025

Seems like forever since the last time we were on a road trip. My wife found this amazing place for us in the jungle on a stream. Beautiful area and walking distance from the race start point.

24/09/2025

Every time I drive past this spot, I feel like there’s a picture waiting to be taken. Today I finally pulled over, wandered around a bit, and tried to find the right angle. The light probably would have been better later in the day, but after a long gym session and some local shopping I was ready to head home. Still, I didn’t want to pass it by yet again. Sometimes you just have to take the shot that’s in front of you instead of waiting for perfect conditions. This place has been calling to me for a while, and I’m glad I finally stopped. Hope you enjoy these.