The Bunion

The Bunion News for the Boston University community without the sugarcoating. Visit thebunionpaper.com for the All sources and quotes are fabricated.

The Bunion is a satire newspaper for entertainment purposes only. The use of the names or likenesses of notable Boston University figures or students is entirely fictional and for satirical purposes. Any resemblance to actual events is coincidental. Editor-in-Chief:
Emma Quarequio

Contributors:
http://thebunionpaper.com/contributors

Founded by:
Kevin Flynn

september 9th. be there. are you funny?
22/08/2023

september 9th. be there. are you funny?

rsvp will be available sometime. welcome to bu!!
18/08/2023

rsvp will be available sometime. welcome to bu!!

shame your roommates and their building in the comments below.
08/08/2023

shame your roommates and their building in the comments below.

introducing the bunion eboard of 2023-2024 through informative infographics
15/06/2023

introducing the bunion eboard of 2023-2024 through informative infographics

Hey s***s, Giving Day is just around the corner and you know what we love more than making you laugh? Hearing your stupi...
02/04/2023

Hey s***s, Giving Day is just around the corner and you know what we love more than making you laugh? Hearing your stupid f*cking opinions! Come down to the GSU on April 11th from 11 AM - 2 PM to tell us which chipmunk is getting the best head and we’ll return the favor. With food and merch. Not head.

Hey guys so we got fed up with our editor in chief and sent her to a big farm upstate, sorry if it’s a slow news day
01/04/2023

Hey guys so we got fed up with our editor in chief and sent her to a big farm upstate, sorry if it’s a slow news day

It’s that time of the year again: in the midst of an intense breakdown triggered by wanting to switch your major for the...
07/02/2023

It’s that time of the year again: in the midst of an intense breakdown triggered by wanting to switch your major for the fifth time, you come to the shocking realization that you haven’t fulfilled your Scientific Inquiry Hub. There’s no chance you’re taking CH101, so you’re left to scramble among 8AM lectures and 9PM lab periods. Your lineup for next semester screams stereotypical COM kid, and mom thinks that taking a science class would be “a wonderful opportunity to branch out”....

It’s that time of the year again: in the midst of an intense breakdown triggered by wanting to switch your major for the fifth time, you come to the shocking realization that you haven’t fulfilled …

By Lauren and Luciano I’ve been the Warren 15A common room couch for 85 years, and you wouldn’t believe the horrors, the...
06/02/2023

By Lauren and Luciano I’ve been the Warren 15A common room couch for 85 years, and you wouldn’t believe the horrors, the absolute travesties I have seen with my own two back cushions. Things that would make war criminals blush. The acts these eighteen year-old boys have committed on these four legs. The Alpha-Sigma-Sigma Initiation of ‘56. The Swordfighting Crusades of ‘79....

By Lauren and Luciano I’ve been the Warren 15A common room couch for 85 years, and you wouldn’t believe the horrors, the absolute travesties I have seen with my own two back cushions. Things that w…

We are hiring! The application for all staff positions is now LIVE on our website ❤️ DM us with any questions you might ...
30/01/2023

We are hiring! The application for all staff positions is now LIVE on our website ❤️ DM us with any questions you might have and we look forward to reading all of your (hopefully) funny submissions!

“You must be at LEAST 5’10”,” he says. His eyes are so full of hope and yearning, I almost lie. But I can’t. He must kno...
13/12/2022

“You must be at LEAST 5’10”,” he says. His eyes are so full of hope and yearning, I almost lie. But I can’t. He must know the truth.

“I’m 5’8”. And so are you.”

By Helena Flynn (COM ’25) “You must be at LEAST 5’10”,” he says. His eyes are so full of hope and yearning, I almost lie. But I can’t. He must know the truth. “I’m 5’8”. And so are you.”&nbs…

In that time it’s best to avoid some uncomfortable conversations including having to explain to your grandma that the bo...
12/12/2022

In that time it’s best to avoid some uncomfortable conversations including having to explain to your grandma that the boy you accidentally brought up at the table is actually a symbol for the multiple people you’ve been hooking up with over the last four months....

In that time it’s best to avoid some uncomfortable conversations including having to explain to your grandma that the boy you accidentally brought up at the table is actually a symbol for the multi…

GSU? But what could those mysterious letters stand for? What was this mysterious and mystical place where the flocks of ...
11/12/2022

GSU? But what could those mysterious letters stand for? What was this mysterious and mystical place where the flocks of students chose to reside?

Have you ever been utterly deceived? I remember the first time I was wronged–I never spoke to my mother again after she confessed that I was adopted. How could a child look into the face of someone…

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The Bunion is a satire newspaper for entertainment purposes only. All sources and quotes are fabricated. The use of the names or likenesses of notable Boston University figures or students is entirely fictional and for satirical purposes. Any resemblance to actual events is coincidental.

Editor-in-Chief: Tim Choi (COM ‘22)

Managing Editor: Sam Vatalaro (COM ‘22)

Contributors: