The Evening Harold

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The Evening Harold The village of Harold is situated between Fe****ng and Gdansk, and boasts two greenmongers and its o

The Evening Harold is a satire website using the format of a newspaper for comedic and satirical effect and is entirely fictional.

Michael Gove is about to be ennobled (Michael Gove!).Lord Wormtongue of Mordor, perhaps?Which reminded us of this classi...
12/04/2025

Michael Gove is about to be ennobled (Michael Gove!).

Lord Wormtongue of Mordor, perhaps?

Which reminded us of this classic from back in the day. We've absolutely no idea which day that was, but had to pop into the office to refresh our memories.

Lose points for observing that the honour is not to be sniffed at.

Michael Gove is said to be “serious but stable” in hospital, after being dusted with salt in a pub garden accident. “A customer was adding salt to their chips, when the lid of the…

While there was a huge pile of dirty dishes in the EH office, we are happy to report Cleggsy McCoy is still with us. He ...
11/01/2025

While there was a huge pile of dirty dishes in the EH office, we are happy to report Cleggsy McCoy is still with us. He was too busy attending to his fleas to notice.

Concerned employees at Amalgamated Holdings Ltd have been mystified by a growing collection of soiled cups. Initially, minor queries were raised with each other about whether the cleaning contract …

10/01/2025

Good afternoon, Haroldites.

We just popped back to see if we'd left a bag of barley sugars in the office. Sadly not.

For old time's sake we fired up the Amstrad PCW 8256 and, whilst it was warming up, nipped over to the Lickers for half a pint of anything that didn't have something wriggling in the bottom of the glass.

That took longer than might be imagined but upon our return we were distraught to discover that someone hadn't been paying the bills for the hosting site, meaning we couldn't read some of our fine prose of yesteryear, not to mention the dross.

Anyway, you'll not be surprised to learn that it was all down to Cleggsy McCoy, our long-term office blame monkey.

After we'd paid him the arrears of his pocket money, he tricycled to the Post Office for a postal order, and you'll be delighted to learn the system is now back up and running. Not the system where we write any new stories (what were you thinking?) but the much less taxing system whereby clicking on an old story brings it back in all its glory.

Too late for a "Merry Christmas", of course, but perhaps not too late to wish you and yours a reasonably content New Year. Or at least a peaceful weekend.

Toodle pip!

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