Hfnzone (2025)

24/10/2025

REST IN PIECES: BALTIMORE MEMORIAL STADIUM.

Baltimore's Memorial Stadium, built in 1954 and nicknamed "The Old Grey Lady of 33rd Street" or sometimes “The World’s Largest Outdoor Insane Asylum" because of crowd noise, was home to the Baltimore Colts and also baseball's Baltimore Orioles. The stadium was a horseshoe with a Greek-Roman colonnade.

The stadium was built primarily for Colts football and could seat up to 80,000 fans. Home games for the Maryland at College Terrapins football and the Naval Academy Midshipmen were also sometimes held at the stadium, attracting a national audience and media coverage.

The Colts won back-to-back NFL Championships in 1958 and 1959, and made it to the Super Bowl twice, losing to the New York Jets in 1968, and winning in 1970 versus the Dallas Cowboys.

Memorial Stadium was not without its shortcomings. Traffic and a parking shortage made accessing the stadium difficult. Concrete poles blocked views, and unsheltered areas grew hot in the summer. Most of the seats were bench-style, with few having chair backs — let alone more modern amenities. Memorial Stadium's limitations remained, and its amenities continued to deteriorate over time. A decade passed and still neither the Colts nor Baltimore could agree to much needed improvements to the aging stadium. Owner Robert "Scumbag" Irsay responded by sneaking the team out of town at midnight, transplanting them to Indianapolis.

Memorial Stadium was torn down in 2001.

24/10/2025

THERE'S SOME VERY GOOD NFL FOOTBALL THIS WEEKEND.

There's some good NFL football every weekend. As usual the erudite and astute staff at HFN will offer some predictions and prognostications.

San Fiasco at Houston.
The 49ers are on top of the NFC West with a surprising 5-2 record, surprising because so many of their best players are all busted up. But QB Macaroni Jones has played like an elite starter and RB Christian McCaffrey is back to his old 110%. Even without defensive stars LB Fred Warner and DE Nick Bosa the 49ers defense is among the best in the NFL.
Houston? They are a disappointment. The Texans have a 2-4 record and look to be watching the post-season on TV. QB CJ Stroud might deserve some bench time or a trade when the season is over. Their offense stinks, their defense is mush, and they get penalized a lot. Niners by 14.

Dallas at Denver.
The Cowboys are riding a high after beating up a Commanders team that has turned out to be mediocre.
Watch out, Cowboys; the Denver Broncos are a team that seems to always have their defense in gear. Year after year, they finish at or near the top of the NFL in stopping everyone. The Dallas Cowboys aren’t so steady.
Where the Cowboys have been doing well is on offense. QB Dak Prescott stopped throwing to everyone else's defensive backs, and WR George "Slim" Pickens is looking elite. Denver QB Bo Chapman Nix has shown he can carry a team.
The Cowboys have not beaten the Broncos since the 1995 season and have not won in Denver since 1992. HFN says it looks like that streak will continue.

Green Bay at Pittsburgh (Sunday Night Football)
Steelers QB A-A-Ron Rodgers gets to play against his old team.
Pittsburgh's offense looks to be designed to keep Rodgers comfortable and untouched. That might not happen this weekend. The Men of Cheese defense looks to be the best Old Man Rodgers will face this season, and he may be eating some turf this game.
This actually looks like an easy win for the Packers.

Other games:
Miami at Atlanta.
Dullfins have become creampuffs

Da Jints at Philadelphia
Eagles get back on Track.

Tampathetic Bay at Nawlins.
A rebound win for the Yuckaneers.

Rout of the Weak:
Tennessee Tuxedo Titans at Baltimore Colts.
Final score could be 63 - 0. Colts look Super Bowl, Titans look trash heap.

23/10/2025

THE NEGRONI IS PUNISHMENT.

The Negroni, a cocktail made of gin, Campari and sweet vermouth, is more of a punishment than a cocktail to be enjoyed. The word "Negroni" itself is Italian for hatred.

It tastes awful. Serve to people you never want to see again.

The Negroni was Benito Mussolini's favorite drink.

23/10/2025

THE STANFORD BAND IS PUKE AND SHOULD BE BANNED FROM PLANET EARTH.

There was a time long ago when the Stanford band wasn’t so disgusting and offensive, or even unusual at all. Until the mid-60s, it marched in regular, military order, until band director Jules Schucat was fired. This sparked rebellion, ultimately leading Stanford to hand authority over to student leaders. Thus, the birth of the notoriously self-absorbed marching band, that thrives on the combined fuel of individual spirit and bad taste, with a large dose of insulting and awful misbehavior.

The student-run portion of the band sets it apart from other schools, where band directors are all-powerful; on the Stanford Farm, the band writes its own bad music, bad half-time shows and even trains its own bad musicians.

The Stanford Band was banned from the Rose Bowl for an offensive routine, then later banned from the State of Oregon for another foray into bad taste. The Band was banned from Notre Dame in 1991 and again in 1997 and banned from BYU in 2004. In 2015, the band got in trouble for alleged violations of Stanford’s alcohol and sexual harassment policies and was not allowed to play at away games.

HFN says pack them all into a rocket and shoot them into the Sun.

23/10/2025

COLLEGE FOOTBALL THIS WEEKEND.

It's getting into the meat of the season, where each game matters to those teams wanting to get into a bowl game or the playoffs. Toss in a few rivalry games and it looks to be a good weekend to watch intercollegiate varsity football.

Friday:
Columbia at Dartmouth (ESPNU)
The Dartmouth Big Green are going to kill the Columbia Lions. It could get ugly.

Saturday games:

Colorado at Utah.
It's not been a good year for Colorado or for their head coach Deion Sanders. The big problem for Neon Deion is that his team isn't very good. Men of Ute, even without QB Devon Dampier, should win easily.

Hahvahd at Princeton.
Cantabs look to be headed to the playoffs.

Alabama at South Carolina.
Gamecocks will lay an egg. Easy win for the Men of Tide.

Texas A&M at LSU.
Tigers will be LoSUrs. LSU Head coach Brian Kelly is coaching career toast.

Missouri at Vanderbilt.
Can the Commodores make the NCAA playoffs? It's very possible.

Virginia at North Carolina.
Belichick's coaching sucks.

Kansas State at Kansas.
The Disappointment Bowl. Both teams were expected to do better. Jayhawks win, but not by much.

Michigan at Michigan State.
Men of Sparta suck bad this season. Michiganders win by 21.

UCLA at Indiana.
Upset special. Bruins have arisen from the ruins. Westwoodies beat the Hoosiers by a field goal.

Ole Miss at Oklahoma.
The Rebels are a bit underrated. Sooners have a top defense but an offense that could do better. Rebs by a TD.

Rout of the Weak:
Wisconsin at Oregon.
What happened to Badger football? Men of Feather win by 35.

23/10/2025

THURSDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL: MINNESOTA VIKINGS AT SAN DIEGO CHARGERS.

Venue: SoFi Field in Los Angeles
Kickoff: 5:15 PM, Pacific time
TV: Amazon Prime Video
Announcers: Ancient Al Michaels and Kirk Herbstreit

The last month has been rough on San Diego. After starting this season a solid 3-0 the Chargers have lost 3 of their last 4, including a loss to the mess otherwise known as Da Jints. Their only win in that span was against another mess, the Miami Dullfins. Their worst loss was a thumping by the Baltimore Colts.

QB Justin "Time" Herbert, along with the rest of the Chargers, have been playing some mediocre football.

The not-any-better Vikings have plenty riding on this game. Right now, this very minute, the Men of Norse sit at the bottom of the NFC North, behind the Packers, Lions and surprising Chicago Bears. So far the Vikings haven't beaten anyone. Wins were against the Bungles and Browns. That's not a promising sign.

Carson Wentz is filling in for JJ McCarthy at QB, who is out with hurt feelings. Wentz is a better passer than McCarthy, although in the last game a couple of his passes ended up in Eagles' hands. Oops.

Each team has a patchwork defense and fair to middling running games. The team with the more effective passing attack will win, and that looks to be the Men of Bolts.

20/10/2025

STILL STANDING: ARROWHEAD STADIUM.

Arrowhead Stadium has been in use since 1972 NFL season, and is currently the oldest stadium in the AFC. It has a seating capacity of around 77,000, making it the 25th-largest stadium in the United States and the fourth-largest NFL stadium. Next door is Kaufman Stadium, home of the Kansas City Royals.

In the first regular season game at Arrowhead Stadium in 1972, the Chiefs were defeated by the Miami Dolphins, the team that defeated the Chiefs in the final game football game at Municipal Stadium, a double overtime playoff game on Christmas Day 1971 that is still the longest game in NFL history.

On November 5, 1972, 82,094 people (the largest crowd to see a game at Arrowhead Stadium) saw the Chiefs defeat the Oakland Raiders, 27-14, to mark their first regular-season victory in their new stadium.

Arrowhead Stadium has hosted five Big 12 Conference football championship games: Kansas State versus Oklahoma in 2000 and 2003, Colorado versus Oklahoma in 2004, Nebraska versus Oklahoma on December 2, 2006, and Missouri versus Oklahoma in 2008.

From 2007 to 2011, Arrowhead Stadium hosted the Border War between the Kansas Jayhawks and the Missouri Tigers. The 2007 game between the No. 2 Jayhawks and No. 3 Tigers, dubbed "Armageddon at Arrowhead" by media and fans, drew the second largest crowd in stadium history, at 80,537.

In 2009 and 2010, Arrowhead Stadium hosted the annual "Farmageddon" game (a reference to the shared agricultural roots of the two competing schools) between the Iowa State Cyclones and the Kansas State Wildcats.

Arrowhead Stadium was chosen as one of the 16 venues that will host soccer games (that funny sport the rest of the world plays) during the 2026 FIFA World Cup.

20/10/2025

NOTES ON THE NFL SEASON SO FAR.

Some erudite and astute observations about the NFL season after week whatever this is.

The Jets are a train wreck. They're winless and look to be a lock for the #1 draft choice in 2026, when they'll pick yet another failed QB. The Jets do have a defense, but on offense once-promising QB Justin Fields has shown that at best he's mediocre. The team had so much hope for success in pre-season.

Miami Dullfins QB Tua Tagovailoa: career over. He's been awful on the field, where his best effort seems to be at throwing picks. He was benched in Miami's 31-6 blowout loss to the almost-as-bad Cleveland Browns. What's worse, Tagovailoa's concussions in past seasons may have finally caught up with him. One may wonder if there's an early onset of CTE.

The Jacksonville Jaguars are the worst 4-3 team in the NFL. QB Trevor "Arabia" Lawrence is crap on his best days, and the Jags should seriously consider trading him at the end of the season.

Half the 49ers roster is the injured list, including QB Big C**k Brock, DE Nick Bosa, LB Fred Warner, and WR's Ricky Pearsall and Brandon Aiyuk, but they win anyway. The 49ers are currently first in the NFC West.

Monday Night's game between Tampathetic Bay and Detroit might have a final score of something like 55 - 49. Can't pick who will win, probably whoever has the ball last. Must see TV.

The Tennessee Tuxedo Titans are spending bank on a new stadium, even though they already play in a new stadium. These morons might have spent a little more time and money working on putting together a good team. They have the league's worst offense and their defense couldn't stop a team of ten-year-olds.

Ditto the Raiders.

The NFC North is still the toughest division. The Pack lead the division with a 4-1-1 record, with the surprise Chicago Bears and Detroit lions close behind at 4-2. Minnesota stands at 3-3.

Pats QB Drake Maye, where did this guy come from? Maye eclipsed one of Tommy Brady's team records during Sunday's 31-13 pounding of the Titans after throwing for 222 yards and two touchdowns as the New Englanders captured their fourth straight win to improve to 5-2 this season. Maye completed 91.3% of his passes in the game.

19/10/2025

SHOULD ANY FOOTBALL FAN EVER DRINK AN APEROL SPRITZ?

No.

The Aperol Spritz, an Italian cocktail made from ingredients no true football fan should ever meet his or her lips, Aperol, prosecco and club soda, has become very popular among wussies, sissies, pansies and Dallas Cowboys fans. Surprising it's become so popular, because Aperol tastes like crap.

A real football fan would pound down 10 or 12 martinis by halftime instead.

18/10/2025

THERE'S SOME NFL FOOTBALL SUNDAY.

The astute football fan would note that one-third of the way through the 2025 season things are beginning to shake out. HFN prognosticates the best games tomorrow.

Washington at Dallas.
The Cowboys have already been eliminated from the playoffs simply because they're the Cowboys. Look for the Commanders and QB Jayden Daniels to bounce back against a crappy Dallas defense. Dak Prescott will throw 20 picks just in the first half.

Philadelphia at Minnesota.
The Eagles are hurting. They'll hurt some more this weekend. What happened to their run game / pass game? The Vikings have a defense that will throttle what's left of the Eagles' offense.
Sirianni is again on the hot seat.

Baltimore Colts at San Diego Chargers.
When did Daniel Jones get to be so good? This one will be a real head knocker. Two quality teams. San Diego by 3 late in the fourth quarter.

Oakland Raiders at Kansas City.
The Raiders travel to Kansas City to play the Chiefs and their referees. KC is on the rebound. The Raiders need a rebuild. Chiefs by 14.

Atlanta Falcons at San Fiasco 49ers (Sunday Night)
Niners lost team leader LB Fred Warner to a broken and dislocated ankle. Half the team is on injured reserve. So what? They'll find a way to win.

15/10/2025

NFL REFEREES ARE ON THE CHIEFS' PAYROLL.

Are NFL referees favoring the Kansas City Chiefs? A recent study thinks so.

The Kansas City Chiefs have faced scrutiny regarding their penalties and officiating. A study suggests that the Chiefs may have benefited from biased officiating, particularly in the playoffs, where penalties against them were more likely to result in first downs and cover more yardage.

A research study conducted by the University of Texas El Paso suggests what we are feeling and thinking isn’t an anomaly or coincidence. Yes, the Kansas City Chiefs are receiving favorable calls in their biggest games.

A database that spans more than 13,000 penalty calls from 2015 through 2023, researchers found that “postseason officiating has disproportionally favored Mahomes and the Chiefs, coinciding with their rise as one of the NFL’s most marketable franchises.”

The theory, developed by the lead author of the study, assistant professor of finance at UTEP Spencer Barnes, Ph.D., considers essential moments such as playoffs and nationally televised games.

15/10/2025

THURSDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL.
Pittsburgh Steelers at Cincinnasty Bungles.

The game features Bungles ancient QB Joe Flacco against even older Steelers QB A-A-Ron Rodgers. Both are over 40. The recently traded Flacco probably knows only a few of his teammates' names.

Cincinnastyi has been awful without Joe Burrow. With four consecutive double-digit losses and the Steelers clicking, it doesn't feel safe to think the Bengals have a chance to win.

Pittsburgh's bend-but-don't-break defense - one that's tied for fourth in red zone efficiency - should give Cincinnasty's weak offense fits all game long.

A-A-Ron Rodgers' throws in the quick game have helped him become one of the league's more efficient quarterbacks through the first four weeks of the season. Entering Sunday's slate, Rodgers was 11th in the league in completion percentage (68.5) and ninth in passer rating (102.5).

This game will be an easy one for the Men of Steel. The Bungles have become doormats.

Hfnzone

24/10/2025

24/10/2025

23/10/2025

23/10/2025

23/10/2025

23/10/2025

20/10/2025

20/10/2025

19/10/2025

18/10/2025

15/10/2025

15/10/2025

Address

Website

Alerts

Shortcuts

Share