27/01/2026
I keep adding things to my already overwhelming to-do list. Which feels… rude? To myself?
Like, hold up, Chica. Can we maybe clear the deck before we start stacking new dreams on top of old obligations?
Case in point: the church I attend offers free music lessons on Fridays. And I’ve always wanted to play an instrument.
Always.
When I was 13, my dad asked if I wanted piano lessons. I said yes immediately. Too immediately, apparently.
“Think about it,” he said.
My parents cared deeply about informed decisions, commitment, and understanding that choices come with consequences.
My 13-year-old nervous system heard: Abort mission, abort!
Instead, I wrote poetry for years. Then, on a whim, bought a guitar. Did not learn guitar. Kept the dream, skipped the discipline. (I don’t even think the thing was ever tuned.)
Now I’m 37, still deeply drawn to creative possibility, but finally aware that desire alone isn’t enough.
Just cause you can dream it, doesn't mean you should do it.
The Dreamer vs The Doer (aka the ongoing internal debate)
I’m a Dreamer.
Always have been.
Ideas. Vision. Strategy. Possibility.
“OOH. You know what would be amazing?”
The Dreamer is my default setting. My value proposition.
It’s the part of my brain that connects dots, spots patterns, and imagines what could be.
It’s why you like my writing.
It’s why clients hire me.
It’s the whimsical magnetism that pulls people into my orbit and makes them curious about the brain producing all this jazz.
But over the last eight years, I’ve quietly built something else: Doer-energy.
The kind built through triaging to-do lists, eating the biggest ugliest frogs first, using timers, focus sprints, and learning the hard way that activation energy is expensive.
And lately, the Doer has found its voice.
The Doer now asks annoying questions like:
Do we have capacity?
What’s the emotional cost?
What quietly suffers if we say yes to this?
Michael E. Ge**er talks about this tension in The E-Myth Revisited through the CEO, the Manager, and the Technician. Three roles. One person. Constant tension.
When I first read it, I felt deeply seen… and mildly attacked.
Because my internal boardroom is chaotic.
The Dreamer is standing at the whiteboard, connecting dots, pitching five new ideas before breakfast. The Manager is clutching a calendar, whispering about timelines and energy levels. The Doer is already tired, and we haven’t even started.
This past year on the Youth Commission team was the first time in a long time those roles didn’t all live inside me.
I got to be my unabashed Dreamer self.
I’d pitch something slightly unhinged. Someone else goes, “Love the enthusiasm, but what if…?” And suddenly the idea becomes viable.
For example, we have a super talented portrait photographer on our team who has such a gift for capturing the essence of a person in a single shot.
And for one of our camps, I thought it would be really wonderful if she would do a workshop/photoshoot with our confirmation class on identity. How loved and valuable they are as young people, especially in a world that's constantly getting us to compare ourselves with all the internet. She ran with it. I wasn't there, but the final result the teens received on their confirmation day was beyond compare.
Each portrait showed a fierceness that was always there but perhaps hidden, their joy unabashedly turned up to 1000, and even their fragility unmasked in a single frame.
Watching my idea go from rough concept to real-world impact without me carrying them alone taught me something.
Now, when a new idea pops up, I hear myself whisper, “Love the energy… but...” Every so often, it’s a firm “No.”
And instead of feeling restrictive, that restraint feels… comforting.
Because my dad was right.
Yesses are weighty. They take up calendar space, energy, and emotional bandwidth.
And every yes is a no to something else.
Fuel the Confessions
Confessions of a Solopreneur is crowd-funded by readers like you. If you’ve ever struggled with too many ideas and not enough capacity, consider supporting this newsletter.
Your fuel keeps these confessions coming: https://robynlee.gumroad.com/coffee
