23/10/2025
And not in a flippant, fleeting way. I mean in the way it settles deep in your bones, usually late at night or when you come across an old family photo, a memory from when your son was tiny, or when you pick up a piece of jewellery he lovingly bought for you once upon a time.
That grief? It’s real.
That confusion? Also real.
But here’s what I’ve learned, over and over again:
You can love someone.
You can have built a good life.
You can still see the pain in their eyes and wish it didn’t hurt so much…
And still know in your heart that it’s no longer right for you.
I get it.
He’s a good man.
Mine was too.
That’s why we chose them.
That’s why we built lives and memories and futures together.
But sometimes the truest act of love, of self-love and love for them, is letting go. Not because we don’t care, but because we’ve outgrown the box we once fit so neatly inside.
It’s a bit like trying to keep wearing your favourite old shoes that you once loved so much. They carried you through many seasons, and you want so badly to make them fit again.
But now… every time you put them on, something feels off. They pinch. Rub. Leave you limping a little.
And maybe, just maybe, you’re meant to walk a new path barefoot for a while until you find what really fits.
If you’re in this in-between place, heart full of doubt, grief, guilt, love, fear, please know:
You are not alone.
And if you need a little love and support on how to even start to have the conversation with your male partner, I can help.
I’ve got 12 free prompts, leave “TALK” in the comments and I’ll send it to you.
*xuality ***an ***anmom
