Kim & Rog

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Kim & Rog

Kim & Rog: Living the Team Life. Relationship conversations for real people, by real people. New episodes every fortnight. Hey! Kim & Rog here. Intrigued?

We’re a couple of West Aussies who are shaking up the narrative you’ve
been “sold” about your relationship so you can start living the life
you both really want, together. Because every relationship can be so much more than two separate lives,
lived side-by-side. After 20 years together, we’ve found the secret ingredient to creating
a life that fulfills our dreams, and it has been staring us i

n the face
(literally) the whole time...each other. Now we’re sharing what we’ve learnt on our Podcast, Living the Team Life. In episodes you’ll:

Hear stories from inspiring (and entertaining) couples living their best lives;
Get access to easy-to-understand knowledge from relationship experts; and
Learn from our own experience doing life together for over two decades

We’re here to encourage you to take bold action and embrace going all-in
on your relationship so you’re building a life that works for both of you -
as a team. Get comfy in whatever tickles your pickle, pop your headphones in
and start taking deliberate steps towards your dream (team) life
— laughs included. Available on Apple, Spotify, Amazon or wherever you get your podcast fix.

24/07/2025

We often show love the way we want to receive it.

But when it comes to emotional connection, men and women usually bond in very different ways.

Where women tend to connect through emotional closeness, care, and presence (hello, oxytocin), men feel loved when they feel like part of a team.

His bonding hormone?
It’s called vasopressin — and it kicks in when there’s trust, purpose, and shared action. 🙌

Here’s how to help him feel more connected — not through more words, but through doing life side by side:

1️⃣ Take on a mission together
Tackle a DIY project, a weekend challenge, or even a fitness goal.
Bonding through action hits differently — because for him, teamwork is intimacy.

2️⃣ Show appreciation
Not just in passing — really notice when he handles something.
A simple “Thanks for sorting that” or “You nailed that” goes further than you think.

3️⃣ Get competitive (in a good way)
Game of cards. Mini golf. Even a cheeky race to see who can unpack the dishwasher faster.
That positive stress? It’s powerful for connection.

When he feels trusted, needed, and like he’s in something with you — vasopressin is flowing, and so is the bond.

✨ This is what we dive into in Episode 99: How to Feel Like You’re in Love Again.
Because feeling close isn’t about doing more — it’s about doing what actually works for each of you.
And it starts with understanding the hormones that drive connection — and how to “hack” them for more love.

🎧 The episode is live now — https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/99-how-to-feel-like-youre-in-love-again

And lastly — gents, if this hit home, share it with your partner.

P.S. We also created a version of this for the ladies.
Check it out in our feed if you haven’t already. 🫶

22/07/2025

At the start of your relationship, you didn’t have to try to feel close. You just did. 💫

But here’s the part most couples never get told:
That connection wasn’t magic.

It was biology.

Your body flooded you with hormones to get things going — fast.

And then one day… it stopped.

The chemicals wore off.
Life kicked in.

And what felt easy… now feels like effort.

Cue the questions:
🤔 “Are we still compatible?”
🤔 “Why don’t I feel as in love anymore?”
🤔 “Do we need to work on this… or is it just over?”

Here’s the truth:
You didn’t lose the spark.
You just stopped creating the conditions that made it. 🔥

This episode is for anyone who’s ever wondered why love started as fireworks — and now feels more like a group chat about groceries and schedules.

We’re breaking down the science behind long-term connection — and how to turn it back on without forcing it, faking it, or feeling weird about it.

You don’t need a couple’s retreat.
You need a few minutes and some hormone hacks that actually make sense. 👏

🎧 Listen via the link // https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/99-how-to-feel-like-youre-in-love-again

18/07/2025

Feel like the spark’s fizzled out? 🥺

When love starts to feel flat or disconnected, there’s often a very real — and very biological — reason behind it.

If she’s feeling distant, overwhelmed, or just a little off… her oxytocin might be running low.

Oxytocin is the hormone that helps her feel emotionally safe, seen, and bonded.
The good news? You can trigger it on purpose.

Here’s how to do it — in a way that actually lands:

1️⃣ Micro-touch moments.
A hand on her back. A longer hug. A no-agenda shoulder rub while she’s making coffee.
Touch builds trust without saying a word.

2️⃣ Plan something, start to finish.
Book the babysitter. Pick the place. Handle the details.
Show her she matters — without her needing to ask.

3️⃣ Be consistent and follow through.
If you say you’ll do it, do it.
Reliability creates safety. And safety builds love.

4️⃣ Bonus: Dream with her.
Talk about the future. Let her see she’s in it with you.

We unpack all of this (and more) in the latest episode of Living the Team Life.

👊 Gents — if you’re ready to feel closer, more connected, and back in sync with your partner, this one’s for you.
🎧 Episode 99 is out now — https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/

🤍 Ladies — if this sounds like something your partner needs to hear, send it their way.
A little nudge can go a long way 🫶

P.S. Keep an eye out for Part Two.
Next week, we’re flipping the script and talking all things vasopressin — because he needs to feel loved too 🤍

10/07/2025

You don’t need to fight less.
You just need to get better at coming back from it 🫶

Because the fight isn’t the problem.
It’s what happens after — the silence, the distance, the stuck-ness — that slowly chips away at connection.

What most couples are missing?

✨ Repair.

And not just saying “I’m sorry” — but actually knowing how to rebuild safety and trust. Just like Rog’s demo 🙌

Here’s the 3-step repair process we use (yep, even after 23 years together):

1️⃣ Initiate the repair
Go first. Even if you’re still a little salty.
It’s not about blame — it’s about choosing your team.

2️⃣ Take responsibility
Own your part (even if it’s just how you reacted).
It signals safety — and that’s what opens the door to connection again.

3️⃣ Show empathy through validation
You don’t have to agree with everything your partner says — but you do have to show that you care.
Saying something like “I get why that hurt” goes a lot further than “Sorry you feel that way.”
It’s in those small moments of empathy that real reconnection begins.

Found this helpful? SAVE this post for the next time things feel tense.

And if you want to hear the real talk, research, and examples behind each step —
🎧 Episode 98: How to Repair After a Blow-Up is out now!

👉 Listen via the link //
https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/98-how-to-repair-after-a-blow-up

Because repairing well isn’t magic.
It’s a skill — and you can learn it 🙌

09/07/2025

SAVE this post if it resonates, and keep reading if you want to learn more ⬇️

Every couple has blow-ups (us included 🙋‍♀️🙋‍♂️). The real issue?

It’s when you get stuck in that weird post-argument space…
Where neither of you knows how to reach out without it turning into round two.

This week on the pod, we’re sharing the exact repair process we come back to again and again — the one that doesn’t just smooth things over, but actually helps rebuild trust, safety, and momentum.

You’ll learn:
💬 How to re-open the conversation (without reigniting the conflict)
🤝 How to take ownership and bring safety into the space between you
❤️ How to use empathy to shift from shutdown… back into connection

If you’ve been craving more warmth, more team energy, and less walking-on-eggshells after a fight — this one’s for you.

🎧 Tune into Episode 98: How to Repair After a Blow-Up
Let’s make repair feel less awkward… and a whole lot more doable 🙌

👉 Listen via
https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/98-how-to-repair-after-a-blow-up

05/07/2025

This is a true story ⤵️
A small rupture.
A big reaction.
But what happened next?
That’s the part that matters.

In this week’s episode of Living the Team Life, we’re diving into the moment after the blow-up — when things are raw, pride is high, and no one wants to be the first to reach out.

Here’s what most people get wrong:
They think avoiding conflict will protect the relationship.

But research says the opposite.
The couples who thrive aren’t the ones who never fight — they’re the ones who know how to repair.

In Episode 98, we walk you through the exact steps:

✅ How to make the first move (without reigniting round two)
✅ Why taking responsibility makes space for your partner to soften
✅ What real empathy sounds like (no “I’m sorry you feel that way” here)
✅ How strong repair builds trust, emotional safety, and what we call your love map

You don’t need a perfect relationship.
You need real repair skills — the kind we’ve learned (the hard way) and use ourselves.

These are the tools no one teaches you.
We’re here to change that.

🎧 Listen now to Episode 98: How to Repair After a Blow-Up
Available wherever you get your podcasts
🔗 https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/98

03/07/2025

You’ve had the fight. Now comes the hard part… knowing what to do after.

Repair doesn’t mean pretending it didn’t happen.
It means choosing to come back together — even when it’s awkward or uncomfortable.

And yep, it’s a skill.
One we’ve had to learn ourselves (the hard way).

Here’s what those 3 steps really look like in practice 👇

1️⃣ Initiate the repair 🤝
Someone’s gotta go first.
Not because they were “wrong” — but because the relationship matters more than the ego.

Try saying:
👉 “This doesn’t feel finished… can we talk about it?”
👉 “I want us to sort this out.”

2️⃣ Take personal responsibility 🧠
Even if it’s just for your reaction.
It doesn’t mean you caused the whole blow-up — it means you’re willing to own your part.

Try saying:
👉 “I shut down and that probably made things worse.”
👉 “I was trying to be right instead of hearing you.”

3️⃣ Show empathy and validation 💬
This is what helps your partner feel emotionally safe again.
You don’t have to agree with everything — but you do need to acknowledge how they felt.

Try saying:
👉 “I can see how that really hurt you.”
👉 “I didn’t realise how much that upset you — thank you for telling me.”

Find this helpful? Save this post so you can come back to it later 💾

And if you want to go deeper, we unpack all 3 steps inside this week’s episode — with real talk, science-backed insight, and stories from our own relationship.

🎧 Listen now: How to Repair After a Blow-Up
Available on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you get your pods.
🔗 https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/98-how-to-repair-after-a-blow-up

26/06/2025

Ever catch yourself thinking… “Do they even see everything I do?” 👀

You’re juggling work, family, life admin, all the little things no one else remembers.
And honestly? You just want to feel appreciated. Noticed. Seen 🥺

It’s one of the most common struggles in long-term relationships — not because your partner doesn’t care, but because somewhere along the way, showing love quietly turned into assuming love.

This week, we’re flipping that script.

We’re talking about how to bring love back into view — not with grand gestures, but with small, everyday actions that speak volumes 💛
Little things that say: “I see you. I appreciate you. I’ve got you.”

If you’ve been craving more connection, more warmth, and more “we’re in this together” energy — this one’s for you 🔥

🎧 Listen to How to Feel Seen and Appreciated in Your Relationship via the link -
https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/97-how-to-feel-seen-and-appreciated-in-your-relationship

21/06/2025

Love is a verb.
It’s not just something you feel — it’s something you do 💛

Because no matter how deeply you love your partner, if that love isn’t being shown, it can start to get lost in the noise of daily life.

One thing we both believe?
When you do love, the feeling often follows. (Shoutout to Terry Real 🙌)

So if you’re looking for simple, meaningful ways to show up with love — here are a few easy ones to start with:

💬 Compliment them — even on the small stuff
☕ Make their morning coffee
🧹 Handle a task they usually do
📲 Send a “thinking of you” text
🤗 Initiate a cuddle or shoulder rub
🎮 Join them in a hobby they enjoy
🍝 Cook their favourite meal
📺 Sit with them during their show
🙏 Say thank you often
🧺 Tidy up without being asked

It doesn’t have to be grand. Just intentional.
That’s what makes love feel real 💛

🎧 For more practical ways to feel seen and appreciated in your relationship, tune into Episode 97 via the link
// https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/97-how-to-feel-seen-and-appreciated-in-your-relationship

12/06/2025

When you're stuck in me mode, everything feels heavier.

You carry the mental load alone.
You make decisions in isolation.
You react instead of respond.
You start protecting yourself instead of protecting the relationship.

But when you shift into team mode — that’s when things start to flow 💫

You plan together.
You problem-solve together.
You’ve got each other’s backs, even when one of you is running low.

Here’s the truth: it’s not always about splitting things 50/50.
It’s about showing up for the team — and trusting that it balances out when you’re both committed to the same goal.

This graphic shares 4 simple mindset shifts that help you move out of me mode and back into strong we energy.
They’re straight from Episode 96 — and they’ve been total game changers for us.

Save it. Share it with your partner.
Chat about which one you're working on right now.

Because the best relationships?
Aren’t built on “me.”
They’re built on “we.” 🙌

🎧 Full episode linked here:
https://living-the-team-life-with-kim-and-rog.castos.com/episodes/96-4-simple-mindset-shifts-that-move-your-relationship-from-me-to-we

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