Wellthy Living for mums

20/06/2025

What teenage boys are trying to tell us and why we need to start listening.

I’ve spent decades working in wellbeing, much of it supporting women. I know the importance of self-worth and of lifting girls and women up and helping them find their voice. But in recent years, as a mum to a son and through countless honest conversations with boys, young men, and mothers of boys, I’ve started to truly see what’s happening for them.

They’re not broken, but they are confused. Unsure how to show up without being judged. Constantly second-guessing how to be in a world that keeps changing the rules without including them in the rewrite.

I wrote this article for Men’s Health Week, but the message extends far beyond that. It’s not a defence of toxic behaviour or a call to swing the pendulum back, it’s an invitation to broaden the conversation, based on what I’ve been seeing and hearing.

I’d really love to hear your thoughts, especially from parents, teachers, and anyone raising or working with boys. Let’s open this up.

And if this resonates, please share it. These are conversations we need more of



Maggie Dent Steve Biddulph's Raising Boys Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families Rebecca Sparrow

In a world that’s fighting hard for equality, boys are quietly slipping through the cracks. Let’s stop talking about them and start…

13/06/2025

Today marks 13 years since the first production of my ‘babyweights- bond with your baby through exercise’ decks.

I remember the day so clearly. After months of working on this baby, it came to reality. I was so proud of what I had produced. I took an idea and with no physical product development experience & brought it to life.

Methodically, I worked through each phase of development, on a very tight budget and with no team.

Looking back, as a more experienced business woman now, I’m quite impressed with myself.

I played content creator, creative director, production manager, sales agent, PR lead, marketing lead, social media manager and more.

I wrote my own press releases and landed exposure in Practical parenting magazine, Woman’s Day magazine, the Sydney Herald sun newspaper, the Body and Soul lift out, Weight watchers magazine, the Stonnington Leader, Mums lounge, amongst blog articles on a number of websites for mums.

I got stock into Readings bookstores, Dymocks books and a number of independent bookstores in Victoria, NSW and QLD. Additionally I secured an order from Sussan ladies wear when they trialled maternity wear, it was stocked in a number of physio clinics, a bunch of pharmacies, including a Priceline store, baby hamper companies, some gift stores and finally on Catch of the day. All these stockists with no sales agent, just me (yes, in hindsight, I’d do that differently).

I went on to develop online programs for mums to support their use of the cards, I spoke at maternal child health mothers groups and womens health and fitness conferences.

Did I reach the potential of this product- absolutely not! Unfortunately, it’s extremely hard to do that when you’re one person doing it all, with limited funds and limited skills in delegation(maybe some control issues here).

In addition behind the scenes in launch year, I was dealing with an emotional marriage separation, my mums cancer diagnosis and parenting a 4 and 7 year old. Looking back, I’m not sure how I even did what I did!

13 years on and this baby, in its current form, and I haven’t been very active in this business for a while, I don’t plan on any more physical production but I did find about half a dozen boxes (approx 100 units) of stock in my garage.

Nowadays my time is focused more on Wellthy Living facilitation, coaching, developing some digital products and doing some professional development. This time last year I became an accredited mediator and I have just completed a ‘culture and character’ practioner accreditation.

I may even revamp some some of the online programs I ran in 2015 centres around ‘babyweights’ and new mums.

If you want to get your hands on one of the remaining decks, for yourself or as a gift, DM me.

Love to know what you’ve been up to? I know some of you on this page have been here since I launched babayweights, so love to know how mum life is going for you now. Maybe you have a house of teens now? I’d love to hear from you.

Much gratitude

Lisa ❤️

Babyweights stock has arrived!

29/03/2025

There’s a much talk about boys/ men and emotiobsl intelligence and the need for healthy masculinity.

So I thought I’d share this list of men’s events for the men in your life who may be interested.

26/03/2025

I don’t see myself as an out of touch parent. I have always and continue to have lots of open and honest conversations with my kids, however sometimes it’s like they speak a different language. Between acronyms and slang it’s not easy to keep up.

Watching Adolescence was an eye opener to not necessarily the themes but the definitely the language and social groups formed online. I hadn’t come across the Incel culture. So if you, like me want to understand it more, this post is helpful.

The world of our young people can be tricky to navigate and it takes a collective effort of learning, understanding and supporting them. This Netflix series has certainly opened up many peoples eyes and important conversations are being had.

25/03/2025

So powerful.

24/03/2025

I’m sure by now many of you have watched the Netflix series Adolescence, if not you’ve been hearing about it. I am currently compiling my thoughts and takeaways and I’ll share that soon but for now here is some info worth sharing. Thanks The Peer Project Podcast for this.

🔎 Understanding the Hidden Language of Emojis 🔎

Netflix’s Adolescence has recently shone a light on something crucial for parents, educators, and mentors — a coded language young people are using online that often goes unnoticed by adults. What seems like harmless emojis may actually have deeper, and sometimes concerning, meanings.

Here’s what to watch out for:

🔴 Red Pill – Used in certain male-dominated online spaces to signal a belief that they’ve ‘woken up’ to hidden truths about women and society. Often linked to toxic and misogynistic ideas.

🔵 Blue Pill – Represents someone who’s considered ‘blind to the truth,’ still believing in mainstream ideas about relationships and gender.

💥 Dynamite – Known as an “exploding red pill,” this symbol points to someone who’s become even more extreme in these views, often tied to incel culture.

🫘 Kidney Bean – Another emoji linked to incel groups, sometimes used mockingly toward women.

💯 100 Emoji – Connected to the so-called “80/20 rule,” the belief that 80% of women are only attracted to 20% of men.

🕳️ Black Hole – Used to express feelings of depression, hopelessness, or being drawn into negative online spaces.

🌪️ Tornado – Represents chaos or feeling overwhelmed, sometimes tied to mental distress.

🐸 Frog – Often linked to extremist meme culture and, in some cases, connected to the controversial Pepe the Frog symbol.

🦅 Eagle – Frequently seen in far-right spaces as a symbol of extreme nationalism.

💀 Skull – While often slang for “I’m dead” (meaning something is funny), in some contexts it can hint at nihilism or darker themes like self-harm.

❤️ 💜 💛 💗 🧡 Heart Colours – These aren’t always just about love!

❤️ = Love
💜 = Lust
💛 = “Are you interested?”
💗 = Interested, but not romantically or sexually
🧡 = “You’ll be okay”

⸻

🛡️ How Can Parents Stay Informed and Support Their Kids? 🛡️

1️⃣ Start with Curiosity, Not Conflict
Instead of jumping to conclusions, ask open questions: “Hey, I read something about emoji meanings changing. Have you heard of this?” Keeping the tone casual can help build trust.

2️⃣ Create a Safe Space for Conversation
If your child feels they’ll be punished for sharing, they’re less likely to open up. Make it clear you’re there to listen, not just to criticise.

3️⃣ Learn Together
Ask your child to explain their digital world — what certain symbols mean, who they follow online, and why. Understanding their perspective can help you connect.

4️⃣ Encourage Critical Thinking
Help your child question what they see online. Ask things like: “Why do you think this group believes that?” or “Who’s benefiting from this message?” This empowers them to think critically rather than just following trends.

5️⃣ Open Dialogue Over Secret Surveillance
Instead of quietly monitoring their activity, make online check-ins a normal part of family life. This builds trust and keeps conversations flowing.

6️⃣ Talk About Manipulation
Explain how some toxic groups use flattery or ‘insider knowledge’ to make young people feel special or important.

7️⃣ Boost Real-World Confidence
Kids who feel valued, supported, and confident in everyday life are less likely to seek validation in dangerous online spaces.

The digital world moves fast, but staying informed and maintaining open conversations can make all the difference.

16/01/2025

Some great activities for those with younger kids:

https://www.facebook.com/share/v/1GreRUgTH1/

20/04/2024

MOTHER’S DAY SALE
Buy a deck of babyweights and receive a free deck to gift to another new mum.

Simply comment with YES PLEASE and I’ll be in touch to arrange payment and delivery.

*Babyweights is a deck of flash cards that include 48 ways you can work out with your baby.

09/11/2023

How much life changes in such a short time. With the speed of tech today, I cant imagine what this girl will be saying in a similar situation when she’s an old woman.

09/11/2023

Spot on…. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Nobody, I mean NOBODY can gaslight you like a teenager. Just in case it has been suggested to you that YOU are crazy, here is the Teen Gaslighting Playbook.

As an example, let's say you told your teen to clean their kitchen mess from last night as well as the rest of the dinner dishes before bed:

You come out in the morning to see all dishes still in the sink. Cookie sheet on the stove. Child has already left for school. You take a pic of dirty dishes and send to teen: "I asked for one thing." Teen, whose phone is permanently attached to palm, ghosts this text entirely. Walks in the door "oblivious."

Tactic 1: Act chipper and innocent. "Hi mom! How was your day? Did you get a lot done? Smells great in here!"

"I asked you to clean the kitchen before bed and you didn't."

Tactic 2: Play dumb. "What? You said to clean the cookie mess and I did!"

"Do you mean this cookie sheet, all the measuring cups, and the utensils in the sink?"

Tactic 3: Act outraged. "I cleaned everything! I cleaned the mixing bowl! I did it! Why are you mad???" Me: "Would you like to see (again) the pics of your dirty dishes in the sink?" Teen, risking their life: "Yeah, show me those pictures. Let's see them!"

*Shows pics of dirty dishes all over the kitchen*

Tactic 4: Act blind. Create alternate reality. Reject the evidence entirely. "That IS clean!"

"Not only did you not do it, you also didn't clean a single other dish like I asked."

Tactic 5: Reinvent history. "You didn't say that! You just said MY mess!"

*Repeat given instructions word for word* - "What did you think I meant by that?"

Tactic 6: Play dumb Part 2. Teen acts like the instructions were given in Mandarin instead of the utterly plain, obvious, and clear meaning. A baby born last Tuesday could understand the instructions. "I didn't know that's what you meant."

"You didn't know 'clean the kitchen' meant to clean the kitchen?"

Tactic 7: Act hurt. "I'm trying as hard as I can! You're acting like I'm a bad kid!"

"I'm acting like you didn't do the one thing I asked and now you are pretending to be confused then pretending you did it despite physical, visual evidence."

But Jen, why would the teens do this to us? you might ask.

Oh! Please don't forget this: they think we are dumb. They think we can be talked out of reality and that they are good actors. They believe we don't know about the structure of a lie, Finsta, hidden accounts, fake sleepovers, sneaking out, putting water in Vodka decanters, smoking on the house roof, nothing. We are just old moms who only know about dinner and carpool.

Remember this, dear parents: THEY ARE LYING. They know you said clean the kitchen. They know they didn't do it. They know those dirty dishes in the sink are *actually* dirty dishes. They know you texted them. They know what you meant. This is all a sham, like it was when we tried it 30 years ago. They will try any tactic to avoid responsibility, like when you cycle through innocence, humor, camaraderie, and tears to get out of a speeding ticket.

A few teens know when the jig is up and act accordingly ("I'm sorry. I blew it.") but these make up the tiny, tiny majority, moms. Most teens will go down with any sinking ship even after it is taking on water, half sunk, falling apart, and labeled the "Titanic."

Don't fall for it, parents. IT'S NOT US, IT'S THEM. Don't let them distract and gaslight you. This is fake. It is all a fake show to get out of trouble. Stay calm and take no bait. They are bad actors, double entendre intended. Don't let their sulking and fake hurt feelings move you either. They can take it up with Jesus.

We did it to our parents. These teens do it to us. Our only joy will come when their kids do it to them one day. God, I can't wait.

What tactics have I missed?

08/11/2023

When I first started this page, my focus was around supporting mums and promoting women's empowerment. The goal was clear: to help mothers be the best role models for their daughters, guiding them towards self-worth and holistic well-being. I was absolutely passionate about boosting girls' self-esteem and empowering them to thrive in our complex world and felt that the best avenue for me to achieve this was working with mums.

But, when I had a son as my second child, it became abundantly clear that many of the pressures and challenges that affect girls' self-worth are also very real for boys. A difference was the lack of resources and projects aimed at supporting parents of boys or the boys themselves.

We've seen movements like "Me Too" make significant strides in raising awareness and advocating for women's rights and safety. However, it's also important to acknowledge that this shifting landscape has left young boys in a bit of a bind. They're grappling with expressing their feelings and navigating ever-evolving social dynamics, all while walking on eggshells, afraid of being misunderstood or accused of inappropriate behaviour. This growing disconnect has left some feeling isolated and, in many cases, severely impacted their self-worth.

Expanding our focus to include boys and parents of boys isn't just a response to gender equality; it's a necessity. The alarming rates of su***de among young men can no longer afford to be overlooked. The expectations and stereotypes that dictate how boys should behave, suppress their emotions, and navigate the journey to self-discovery have left many feeling lost and alone.

The statistics on su***de among young men are deeply troubling, and this heartbreaking share below from Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families shows how vital it is that we shed more light on this issue. These young men are not only dealing with the typical challenges of adolescence but also carrying the heavy weight of societal pressures that discourage them from discussing their struggles openly.

Creating safe spaces where boys can be themselves, express their thoughts, and navigate the intricacies of growing up is essential. We need more men role modelling healthy relating, self worth and whole person wellbeing to our boys.

Perhaps we need to bring back intergenerational conversation circles where boys are not just learning from their peers but from their wiser elders.

I certainly don't have all the solutions but I do believe conversations about mental health need to be normalised and both genders need to feel safe to share openly and honestly without feeling like they will be judged harshly by doing so.

My heart goes out to Justin and all of Logan's family who are grieving his premature death. 💔

26/10/2023