Onesikhmom

Onesikhmom Sukhi is a community organizer, college science teacher, content creator, and bookworm.

12/24/2025

When I went back to university a few years ago, little did I know how patriarchy would creep up behind me and say, “enough studying; focus on the kids and your family.”

Pursuing a higher education in my 40s showed my daughter that women can study before and after marriage; it showed my son that he can either crush a woman’s dream or choose to support her up to the finish line (and beyond).

So cycle breaking means showing my kids that there’s no age limit to schooling.

Education | Parenting | Momlife | Cycle Breaking

                               

12/23/2025

Which of these inspires your next outfit?

Wedding | Desi | Indian Wedding

🎵
 

To all the Guardians of Holiday Magic- it’s all worth it!🎅🏽Which part of being the holiday magician do you find to be th...
12/23/2025

To all the Guardians of Holiday Magic- it’s all worth it!
🎅🏽
Which part of being the holiday magician do you find to be the hardest?
🎄
Holidays Parents Kids Magic Christmas

12/23/2025

Let’s learn our OCCUPATIONS in Punjabi!

NOTE 1: We tried NOT to use names of occupations that are associated with any castes. If we accidentally did this in the video, we are unaware of it & apologize in advance.

NOTE 2: Pronunciations have been spelled out phonetically to help you learn the word.

NOTE 3: we are not wearing wigs; this is our real hair 😜

Let us know which occupations were new to you!

[Eye on Asia was a Canadian tv show]

 

12/23/2025

I never went to any high school dance, formal or prom (there’s one exception). I was too scared to ask my parents and I assumed the answer would be ‘no’ because I was a brown girl and good brown girls didn’t go to dances.

So instead, I sat in my living room, in the dark behind the curtains, and watched everyone else go. I missed out on socializing with my girlfriends, but I wasn’t alone; my other brown girl friends never asked either.

This is a common thread amongst children of immigrants; our parents opted to ‘protect’ us instead of ‘prepare’ us for situations like this.

So cycle breaking means encouraging my daughter to open the lines of communication and tell her parents what she wants; then to actually go and have fun with her schoolmates!
[happy to say she went to her first formal this year and had an amazing time dancing with her friends until 11pm].

Momlife | Motherhood | Parenting |
Cycle Breaking

12/23/2025

Many young adults over 30 are unmarried. For some, it’s a choice & reflects their economic independence, career aspirations or pursuit of higher education. For others, it’s not a choice but the result of not finding the right partner or being in long term relationships that just don’t end up in marriage.

The unmarried lifestyle seems to challenge our traditional norms; it results in shaming & stigmatization for being single- especially women over 30. Our community still believes that a woman’s worth is tied to her status of being married. None of her self accomplishments are even equivalent to finding a life partner; marriage is seen as the ultimate goal in life.

If a woman is 30+ years old and unmarried:
•she’s too picky in choosing a partner & should “just settle with anyone”
•she’s becoming a bojh (burden) to the family
•she’s selfish for pursuing personal fulfillment
•she’s constantly reminded that her window to have children is slowly closing

In “The Patriarchs,” Angela states that patriarchy groomed women for marriage & this is one reason why we think that women “must be married.” There could be many reasons why someone is unmarried, but understand that (1) we never know the whole story, and (2) it’s really none of our business😉.

So cycle breaking means allowing women the freedom to make their own choices regarding marriage without judgment, scrutiny, harassment or discrimination. Whether they’re focusing on their career/schooling, or they just haven’t found the right partner yet, if you can’t support them, then keep your comments to yourself.

Will you help us break this cycle?

Featuring 💜

🏷️ Parenting | Cycle Breaking | Unmarried | Single
               

12/22/2025

Why does our community praise men for washing the dishes or ‘helping’ with the laundry? They’re labelled as an “amazing son” or “such a considerate husband,” but when women do the exact same things…it’s just something that is “expected” of us… because it’s a part of our role.

Some moms are studying for a second degree or starting a new business venture from their basement or volunteering their time within the community, all while working a job AND keeping the household afloat. But the same community that overpraises men never sees or acknowledges anything that we are doing😔

As much as we shouldn’t need external validation or praise, it still feels nice to hear it once in a while. It keeps us going and makes us feel seen.

So, if a man deserves praise for a small task, be sure it’s equally given to his partner for that same task as well😉

Parents | Moms | Dads | Desi | Double Standard
             

I have a feeling this will become an annual cookie now! The combination of spices in this cookie with the anise 🤌🏽… so d...
12/22/2025

I have a feeling this will become an annual cookie now! The combination of spices in this cookie with the anise 🤌🏽… so delicious!

Let me know if you make these and what you think!

Cookies Baking Holidays Moms Pfeffernusse German Cookie

12/22/2025

I just want to share the reality of mature women (especially moms) who go back to school. I couldn’t do it without the support of my family, especially my partner.

For the past year and a half, I’ve missed summer pool days, family movie nights, visits to the grandparents, countless hockey games and so much more. When my partner works 12 hour shifts, I feel like a single parent for days. But on his days off, he steps up and takes over so that I can catch up on my studies.

I wish we all had a partner like this.
Someone who believes in our abilities, encourages us to fulfill our dreams, and pushes us to excel- all while quietly putting their own dreams aside, for now.

Shoutout to all the cheerleaders in our lives💜

 

As a first generation Sikh Canadian, my fear is that our faith, language and culture will become diluted with each passi...
12/22/2025

As a first generation Sikh Canadian, my fear is that our faith, language and culture will become diluted with each passing generation.

And most parental conversations- and dilemmas- seem to stem around this time of year, with Shaheedi month and the Sahibzaade up against Christmas.

When you live in a country that has a 2 week “winter break,” where all schools and most companies pause for a religious holiday, you have to take advantage of this. Including the “culture” of Christmas in your home may look like a family gathering, or learning to make traditional food, exchanging gifts, putting up a Christmas tree, or maybe even joining in the magic of Santa and his elves. But none of this is religious- it just feels more like a Canadian/North American thing.

If Sikhi is our compass, and our faith is practiced daily, then nothing can replace that. And as devastating as the stories of the Sahibzaade are, reminds us that it’s a time to be inspired by their unwavering faith in Sikhi. It’s also another opportunity for parents to share stories of our history and real life heroes.

So, it’s not really an either/or mentality- we can do both, if we choose to (*and we DON’T judge others on what they choose to do*). We can allow our children to partake in the occasional traditions of this country, because instilling our faith is a daily and deeply spiritual practice.

As parents, we help our children learn their faith, language and culture each and every day. If we lay down a solid foundation, then celebrating Christmas won’t shake that.

*many will disagree, and that’s ok. Do what you think is best for your family*

Sikh Sikhi Holidays Parents Kids

12/22/2025

I remember talking to my mom long ago and asking her why she couldn’t say sorry to me. She said “parents don’t apologize to their kids.” Why not? Is it a sign of weakness? Are parents perfect in everything they do? Aren’t they human like us?

Some of it comes down to ego- thinking that someone younger than you (especially your children) cannot possibly know more than you (an elder). But our parents sacrificed so much to provide an education for us, and then they don’t want to hear us using that knowledge on them. Others think it’s just disrespectful to correct your elders while many think it’s a sign of weakness.

So cycle breaking means that I apologize to my kids:
1-to show them empathy
2-that I take responsibility for my actions or errors
3-to help build trust and respect in our relationship
4-and to show that I’m not perfect.

Are you trying to break this cycle?

Inspo from 💜

Dadlife | Momlife | Parenting | Cycle Breaking
                               

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