
04/22/2025
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God is directing me to gain a clearer view of where I am today. Am I fighting this season, or working with it?
I feel drained, exhausted, drowning at timesโand sometimes, I lose my train of thought.
Before, I was at my laptop, juggling a full workload and telling God that I wished to be a housewife, away from all the stress. Now, that prayer has been granted.
During breastfeeding, cleaning the house, preparing meals, caring for my children, reading them books, playing with them, and helping them through each day, I feel my body and mind slowly wearing down. I long for rest, and my bed seems to pull me in like a magnet in no time. I can say that my days currently are about surviving.
Where am I now? I am in both the winter and wilderness season of my life.
Itโs like when Jesus went into the wilderness alone to seek God. He was alone, hungry, and exhaustedโexperiencing all the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual trials of that season. Thatโs how I feel now. Alone. Just trying to regain strength. No one speaks, no one affirms or blesses. But I know God is here, holding me, reminding me of His faithfulness. I wouldnโt be writing, contemplating, or praying if He werenโt with me. He is here.
Iโm in the winter season in the wildernessโlike a perennial plant whose roots grow deeper, seeking nutrients below the frozen ground. I am like that plant, deeply connecting with God. Iโm not lonelyโIโm just alone, leaning in so I can hear Him more clearly, talk with Him, and praise Him. God is preparing me for something I donโt yet understand, but my heart tells me to be equipped and embrace the preparation.
God is helping my attitude align with this season. I have a choiceโto respond with frustration, or to humbly ask for His provision.
I thank the Holy Spirit for telling me this and reminding me of the truth of my existence, assuring me that God is not rejecting my prayers, ignoring my tears, or forgetting His promises.
Even when no one else is speaking or affirming, Heโs asking me to trust Himโand to enjoy His voice.
This season is deeply significant in preparing me for who I will become in His time of harvest.
I must endure this season in order to step into the next level of faith.
To the one reading this,
God is not neglecting you.
He is preparing something beautiful in you.
He loves you.
Itโs not an accident that you are here. The deep sorrow, hatred from the past, loneliness, unmet expectations, tiredness, and doubts.
God is asking you to trust Him, and inviting you to prepare with humility and faithfulness.
Heโs with you. Listen to His voice.
In Jesusโ Name. Amen.
Light and Love,
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