08/04/2022
โจ๏ธSometimes I get asked, how I am able to do what I do...some days I wonder myself. I am not immune to the pain, sadness, loss, and regret that I hear in people's stories when they talk about how much they miss their loved one, or wish they had more time with their loved ones before they go.
โจ๏ธI am in a unique position because of the fact that the stories and songs I create about them are intended to be shared publicly 99% of the time, through my own lens as a songwriter. It is essential for this work that I place myself into the feelings and position of the person I am writing for, to best capture their stories, their essence, their energy, in music and words. I then think of all the people in similar lines of work, where devastating and traumatic stories take a toll on the person making space for them. Therapists, doctors, nurses, social workers, funeral directors, and many more...We don't get into these lines of work because we are unaffected by what our clients are going through; we get into this work most often because we can deeply empathize with what are clients are going through, and feel like our experiences or platforms can help support someone where we may have not felt supported ourselves.
โจ๏ธTruthfully, my relationship with grief and loss is complicated and as messy as the next person's. While I certainly have thoughts about my own inevitable experience with dying, one of my biggest fears in life, ever since I can remember, has been losing people and beings that I love. What that grief can do to a person, how it demands transformation. The stories I hear are a constant reminder of our limited time in these human bodies. Working to balance life and death is something I am continually negotiating with. Sometimes I get overwhelmed, pulled into a dangerous fear spiral of "what if's". Like us all, I cope, I seek out friends, therapy, lighter moments, walks with my dog. It can be painful, and yet I feel compelled to make space, for myself and others, to feel the depths of our emotions, even the ones we think might be the end of us. ๐And to not forget the people who made us who we are.๐
More thoughts on this to come I am sure. Thanks for reading