15/04/2025
He came to me with teary eyes and said "mom, am I really that fat?" I was like yoo wait a minute, what's going on?
It was a Tuesday afternoon he returned from school, and I pleaded that he gets some items from the provision store while I rounded up with the customer's document I was typing.
Minutes later, he returned looking dejected with teary eyes. He sat on the bed reluctantly and asked, almost like a whisper because he was just about to cry. You could tell he has been holding those tears for a long time, waiting to reach home.
He said "mom am I really that fat?" I paused, making sure I understood very well before I answered because I could sense that he was hurting.
Then I asked, where is that coming from? He said he met some children on his way home and they mocked at him, calling him fat.
I took a deep breath and told him to come close, and I held his hands, looking into his eyes reassuringly then I answered, you are the most handsome and cute boy I've seen. You are not fat, neither are you thin, you are chubby and cute, just the way God created you.
Remember people see you just the same way they see themselves. Someone who is filled with negative thoughts about themselves, will find it difficult to love and appreciate others, they will always see the negative things about others because that's how they are inside. It could be because they have been insulted countless times that they feel it's okay to mock others, or they were not brought up in the fear of God to know that it's wrong to mock others.
So you see son, it's not about you, it's about them. You can't stop people from having an opinion about you, but you can control how you react to their opinion of you.
You can't stop a bird from flying over your head, but you can stop it from building it's nest on your head. So when next you see them, ignore them and if they try to get your attention, just walk pass silently okay?
I saw his confidence growing up again and then he hugged me and smiled.
I felt relieved and happy too.
Two days later, I sent him to that same store to buy some things, and to use 200frs to get something for himself.
He came back with a smile and said mom guess what, while I was eating cake I bought with the money you gave me and coming back, I met those same children on my way, they were staring at me as if they wanted to beg, but they couldn't.
We laughed over it and we were satisfied. I felt so glad that this incident didn't affect his self esteem, but I thought him one lesson, how to react to people's opinion of him.
Have you had to deal with a similar situation? How did you handle it?
Do you think I handled it well?
I know many parents can relate to this