28/09/2025
The Predictator
It is with a heavy heart,
And it is the biggest heart,
Bigger and better than any other the doctors say,
But it's with this big, better, heavy,
But not fat, they don't say it's a fat heart,
But a heart that has seen more,
And felt more than anyone else's heart.
And so this heart must announce the end of days is coming
And it's coming as I predicted,
For I am the best predictator
This country has never wanted.
Putin laughed at me,
Jong-Un smiled and waved,
Xi grinned and nodded.
These phony dictators should follow my lead,
My tariffs stopped everyone in this country smiling,
The National Guard on the streets made everyone think,
No more immigrants, No more healthcare, No more pets in Springfield.
Just as I predicted,
For I am the best predictator,
This country has never wanted.
So now the end is near,
I wrote those words first and it was copied by others before I wrote them,
My words speak for themselves,
Flowing like verbal sewage,
To your phones, computers and television sets,
Inside your homes because of the curfews,
Just as I predicted,
For I am the best predictator,
This country has never wanted.
They tried to stop me,
With their escalators and teleprompters,
Tried to impeach and convict me,
Hit me with bullets and unlawful laws,
But I dodged each one with divine help,
Just as I predicted,
For I am the best predictator,
This country has never wanted.
As I was saying, and I say it quite beautifully,
The end is within striking distance,
Just like the submarines and planes,
Those big beautiful planes,
Just as I predicted,
For I am the best predictator,
This country has never wanted.
It will end quickly for many and painfully for others,
but take the pain, not the Tylenol,
And welcome the light, the big beautiful light,
Just as I predicted,
For I am the best predictator,
This country has never wanted.
Goodbye my fellow Americans, I will miss you all,
Signing off from my big, beautful, protected and secure bunker,
Just as I predicted,
For I am the best predictator,
This country has never wanted.
AIPY Sep 2025
