16/08/2026
Oan Ur Travels Tae America
Weel ah rode richt intae Texas in ma aine Wee Tartan Hoorse, shair, Ah caud huv took the train, bit Muckle Heenrie caudnae o went o across Muckle Henry reelished, o the een on him, the sheriff wisnae best pleased, Eh! Can ye git rid o him!!! Weel Heenrie wisnae huvin it. In fact he bit him oan the erse, as he goat his gun an aimed at him, weel he now jist booked his hearse, he grabbed him by the neck, an shook him silly, in fact he shook him so hard. Richt oot his claithes and bit aff his willie, noo a crowd appeared, things wur gittin kinda crazy, o the local lads wur cheerin an the maids wur dancin Blue Maisie. So ah hurled masel aff Heenrie, said Weel hoos ir gan. Ivverie wan wis cheerin and tae Heenrie a real well done, fur the sherrif wis an as***le, a bent wan at that, he'd book ye fur nuthin, he wis also blin as a bat, sae in the bar we went, A wh***ey fur the laddie, an huv ye a cairit fur Heenrie. Oor new mascot horse fur the toon o Big T. Weel we pairtied tae the sma oors, ah taucht thaim hoo tae jig. The funniest thing o nicht, wis Wild Billy losing his afro wig. He wis wheekin roon the dance flair, daen The Dashin White Sergeant, as he went fur eicht and back fur eicht, he went heid oor tit, ah proper Scotsman he jist aint, sae next day in toon we set aff agane, the streets wur lined we weemen an followed us the men, safe tae sae this weelcome. Became the norm fur us, fur ivverie toon fae Louisiana, Mississippi tae Florida, bit we shair missed Texas.
