The Spring Back Guide

26/11/2024

👀 READ CAPTION: THINGS WE START DOING AT THE END OF MAT/PAT LEAVE👩🏽‍🍼👨🏻‍🍼

GOOGLING👩🏾‍💻:Yes, an astronaut looks straightforward👩🏻‍🚀- zookeeper🦒 ? NOTHING wrong with these btw😂, and I’ve had clients make some incredible career changes… BUT - energy is precious. Slow + steady before we make life-altering decisions🐢Googling is a bit like running. What is it that’s truly panicking you right now🤔

HOMESICKNESS🤢:those big inhalations of baby’s hair😌Smelling their clothes (is it just me who’s into smelling everything?). That horrible pit of the stomach + the midnight anxiety😰 I FEEL you. But I promise the dread of the return is worse than the return. What’s your big fear? Write it down✍️Share that with a close friend (or me). You’d be surprised at what that does to this fear🤷‍♀️

2ND GUESSING CHILDCARE😬:Ok you’ve picked nursery. “What about [insert other nursery with a 2y long list]? What about all the 1:1 care baby needs? [they will be fine. And if they’re not fine, you change it.] What about all the bugs they get [they’re going to get them all at some point, whether it’s now or in 4y]” There’s no childcare choice without cons💯

LESS PATIENCE😤:you may not have noticed this one until reading this. When we have unresolved stress this can come out as a short fuse, with the baby, with your partner or with your parents/inlaws🤬This is normal btw before you beat yourself up. Be kind💜It’s a big unknown and you’ve never done this before.

WORRYING YOU’VE FORGOTTEN EVERYTHING😰:Things may have changed less than you think 😂. It’s normal to take a few days to get your head back ‘there’. EXPECT that there’ll be some childcare hiccups. Have a plan with your partner/support system to make it very clear who does emergency pickups to avoid miscommunication📱

RE-READING THE CONTRACT📄:If you’re not ready to end your maternity leave, that’s ok. Sometimes we plan for x months off, but change our minds. You’re ALLOWED to change your mind. You’re ALLOWED to want to see the full set of options📑

…If you’re doing any of these, you’re in the right place💜✨THERE IS NO PERFECT WAY TO GO BACK✨However.if you want help finding YOUR way, then..

14/11/2024

Loneliness on (+Paternity) is REAL 😞

I remember an old colleague of mine telling me how much she’d “LOVED” her matleave: “All I did was drink Prosecco in the park”!(If this is you - happy for you - this isn’t the post for you 😉 )

So when I had my first , and felt deep, true loneliness - it made me feel like a freak. 😔

Maybe it was just me?

Nope - it wasn’t. And I WISH someone had told me that this was really, really common. 🤷‍♀️Why does it happen? And what can we do about it?

1. ➡️ Our journeys are so different. I had a sick baby, a weird birth, a horrible NICU experience and no breastfeeding. I couldn’t have felt more separate from my (very nice) NCT group. ✨ BE KIND TO YOURSELF - THERE IS NO ‘PERFECTION’ IN BIRTH, FEEDING OR MOTHERHOOD✨
2. ➡️ Exhaustion is real. My 1st didn’t sleep for 2.5years😵‍💫. Sleep deprivation can make us feel unhinged. When we are used to being ‘busy’ all day at work, being in core survival mode can make us feel ‘useless’. Speak to your partner / a family member to prioritise ONE night of sleep… You’ll feel 10x better. And remember ✨YOU WILL SLEEP AGAIN (promise)✨
3. ➡️Our friends may be at different life stages. Before babies, we’re sort of on the same ladder. Babies suddenly make it… a jungle gym. ✨PUT YOURSELF OUT THERE, GO TO THAT BABYGROUP! NEW FRIENDSHIPS TAKE TIME TO FORM (and then they’re so worth it)✨
4. ➡️Postnatal Support.Until it’s fixed, I’m afraid it’s slightly DIY - but there are good things about this. You can be selective and find the right support for your own situation - but you have to ✨ASK FOR HELP (sort of what we are here for!
5. ➡️ partners (generally) haven’t gone through the experience of growing a human. And birthing it. And then the broken glass b***s at the start feeding it. AND the rest...masculinity in our society doesn’t have the greatest ability to empathise - but generally they are truly trying. And it’s better than it was for our mums?! ✨LIVED EXPERIENCE = EMPATHY. Try and leave the baby more with them, as much as you feel comfortable with... little by little they WILL start to get it✨

Signup to Go Back Happy 💌for the full piece… tomorrow!

13/11/2024

✨ You’re not the only one. 👶💻 - do you feel …. Meh? 🤷‍♀️

13/11/2024

New look 👀

01/02/2024

Another in-person event 😱😬🤸

Next Wednesday 7th, in London 🇬🇧! Ok so there is a brilliant UK network for women in comms, called (if you work in PR or comms DEFINITELY take a look). I will be joining a brilliant fireside panel - with Gabriella Griffith, Richard Ottoy ( a dad working for whose wife’s back to work experience made him passionate about… yep… ) and Claire Mullarkey who is UK Sales Director at .

Next week (Wednesday 7th of Feb!) we will be discussing the aptly named “The Power Of Your Village” - to explore how work and home can be improved, by utilising the resources around us to and ensure all parents, and carers, feel validated and supported at work.

Join us next week to learn about how we can all become an ally to those who are parenting or caring in the workplace, and empower those around us to bring their most authentic selves to work.

Also, if you want to just come say hi, let me know!

👀 You can find tickets 🎟️ with

21/12/2023

03/10/2023

Ok so - def not the first person to come up with this term (Really wish I was though 😂). We all know what Maternity is. Returnity (in my view) is the back to work journey 🏡💻

It is definitely not yet a ‘thing’ in our workplaces. But it definitely should be🤔

For us AND our Bosses. And I’m gonna tell you why 🤓 

Mat policies are centred around the physical act of becoming mum👶🏾 , that has to be legally acknowledged✍️(unless you live in the USA🇺🇸😬….). And even that ‘acknowledgment’ can fall short when you’re scraping by on statutory mat ‘pay’💸(Mine barely covered formula & nappies 🤔).

It tends to basically be bullets of how much your £ will diminish by 💸💸and over what time period⏰. With some KIT days chucked in 😥. And perhaps a phased return (if you’re lucky)😬

‘Back to work’ is therefore usually lumped into a Mat Policy. An afterthought. Because - your Mat Leave has ended - right? So you ‘just’ …. go back… Right?😅

We all know the hideousness of the nursery bugs🦠🤒 . The nursery number flashing up on your phone 📱😖- juuuuuust as you’re stepping into a client meeting 🆘. You and your partner battling over WhatsApp “But MY meeting is more important” (Define important 🙄). It creates tension at home - AND tension at work🫣

Boss: “Can’t someone else collect them?” You: “Um - no?”

✨A Returnity approach from workplaces fixes this
✨It acknowledges the transition period as a very real ‘thing’. Sometimes we simply want to feel heard👂
✨It professionally accepts the teething issues that come with a baby who’s still adjusting to life outside of the mummy bubble with its emotional + physical results💜
✨It decreases our mumguilt, decreases our workguilt, and makes us feel valued + supported💕
✨So it makes us more likely to stay. Up to 95% more likely to stay, actually (DM me for sources)

⚠️ Given that a whopping 85% of women quit their existing role within 3y of coming back after a baby (thanks and the awesome Jess Heagren for this statistic)- 💖VALUING and SUPPORTING 💖your female talent is integral to retention - and therefore money saving. It’s also the right thing to do 🤫

Let’s make it a thing??

12/09/2023

It's official: “working mum” is out of fashion😬…

Let's break it down though 🧐. WHY is it out of fashion?

1. All mums ‘work’, right? There’s paid work, + unpaid mumming = work😅!
2. The majority of mums now work👩🏽‍🦱, when the majority used not to👵🏽. So for some it feels out of date to say ‘working mum’.
3. It excludes the Dads🧔🏼‍♂️ - almost all of whom are working. Facts!

I agree with ALL of these btw 🙌. But.

…I’m still calling us working mums for now 🤷‍♀️ .

Why?

By cancelling the name, we aren't able to describe "this group": who need specific support💜.

"This group" is at a biiiiig crunch point😖. And NEEDS special support: from our politicans🤓 our workplaces 💼, and people like me 👋. It’s why I am DM’d EVERY single day about a “working mum” problem since this biz was launched 3m ago 😟.

Cost of living, childcare, structural sexism, not-very-subtle maternity discrimination, w/mental load still on women.. etc. “This group” is up against a lot, and need help 💪.

Postnatal support is not famous for being great 😏... Throw in a back to work journey, with an unhealed birth injury❤️‍🩹, for example, and holy cr*p 🤯😱.

So - my view is that taking away the name of the group isn’t the most efficient way to affect change.

“But Letty, why can’t you just refer to them as working parents?”

Because: when we give birth, we go through enormous physical, social, mental and emotional changes 🧬 🩸🤱🤰🏻😴. We grow life for 9m. We nurture it for the 3+ infancy years after - where we are still no.1 for our little people. BFing is a huge resource too, if you choose to / are able to.

⚠️⚠️⚠️ I’m NOT denying the dads go through changes too! But it’s not to the same extent as those who give birth, AND I am not best placed to serve this group 😂 who have THEIR OWN unique challenges (Btw , and absolutely is 👏👨🏻‍🍼)

So: this account is specifically for working mums, working mums-to-be, AND the partners / blokes trying to understand their person's perspective better (I see you!! You are brilliant 🤩).

What are your thoughts 💭 ? And who can come up with a better name!?!👇