Angry People in Local Newspapers

28/07/2025

That’ll flood the engine.

Spotter: Lisa

28/07/2025

Meanwhile in Germany: Drunken youth at folk festival thinks the sausages are too expensive, so he calls the police, several times. Then he finds himself arrested after continuing to be a dick after being told by the police to stop being a dick.

Spotter: Dave

Ein Betrunkener will im oberfränkischen Hof den Preis für ein paar Bratwürste auf einem Volksfest neu verhandeln. Dafür ruft er sogar die Polizei. Doch am Ende des Abends hat der Mann ein ganz anderes Problem.

28/07/2025

Let’s just drive a coach and horses through the Malicious Damage Act (1861) and risk two years hard labour by demolishing the joint (which in its present state we may call a hovel) as part of a riotous assembly. You go first.

A council has served a legal notice on the owners of a former pub site that collapsed into the street after a "massive" fire broke out.

28/07/2025

Good Lord, there’s a gardening crime wave going on and I blame Titchmarsh.

The mower was found by police hidden in woodland outside the village

28/07/2025

“He came at me with a sharpened cucumber, your honour”

Nope. Got nothing for this one.

Spotter: Paul

Samuel Rowe, who was returning from allotment, seeking to overturn caution for possession of offensive weapon

28/07/2025

He just wants to know what love is.

28/07/2025

“One had a stroke, but the other two couldn’t reach”

DISTRESSED veterans got more than they bargained for when they came face to face with a swarm of naked cyclists flashing through Clacton.

28/07/2025

Pretty certain her car would have survived the two-hour drive home without exploding, but that’s just me.

Spotter: Martin

Emma Drinkwater's car was fitted with defective airbags blamed for the deaths of 35 people worldwide.

27/07/2025

Important vintage pie news

Spotter: Sean

27/07/2025

Things which may or may not be like a war zone because I have no intention of ever finding out: The latest theatrical production at the Savoy Theatre, just off the Strand in Central London.

Spotter: Kenny

27/07/2025

Vows never to return KLAXON

Spotter: Edward

They claim there was toothpaste in the sink, urine in the toilet, a sewing needle in the carpet and no running water in the food kiosks

27/07/2025

It’s at times like this we ask “What would Jesus do?”, and we are pretty sure the answer would be “Join in singing Dancing Queen”

Spotter: Gary, Neil, Paul, Stephen

Jonathan Baker complained over noise ‘in my house’, telling stunned singers night is ‘over’