30/09/2026
You don’t have to earn your rest.
I’m still learning this too.
I’m quite good at pushing through. Work, family, jobs that need doing, people needing something from me… and sometimes I can get so caught up in all of that that I stop listening to myself.
The funny thing is, my body usually tells me.
Aches, pains and little twinges. Feeling tired. My eating goes to rubbish and I start eating my emotions. Or I find myself starting five different things and somehow finishing none of them.
Those are some of my signs that I need to listen.
And I’m getting better at noticing them.
For me, looking after myself might be putting some music on and having a dance. Picking up my guitar and practising the basics. An audiobook. Walking the dog. Seeing friends. Sitting down and actually enjoying a coffee.
And sometimes it’s simply sleep.
Do I ever feel guilty about stopping when there are still things to do?
Absolutely.
I just don’t automatically listen to the guilt anymore.
Because to be the therapist, husband, dad, friend — and person — I want to be, I need some space for me too. Space to rest, recover and regroup.
The chores don’t always have to be done now.
I don’t have to jump every time somebody wants a piece of me.
And people-pleasing? I’m actually OK with that part of myself. I just want it to happen on my terms, because I’ve chosen to give something rather than because I’ve forgotten I have a choice.
Does it still catch me out? Of course.
I’m a work in progress too.
So rather than asking yourself whether you’ve done enough to deserve a rest today, maybe just notice:
What is your body, your mood or your behaviour trying to tell you?
You might already know what you need.
Martin
New Horizon Counselling