Rogue Football Guy

Rogue Football Guy Game's gone ❌

I'm bringing it back 1 rogue video at a time ⚽

Not another generic football account ✅

03/09/2026

MIKE DEAN: OFFICIAL STATEMENT - The latest on the Mike Dean mini games scandal.

Mike's PR team would like to address the recent comments made on Jamie Vardy's podcast. We apologise for any disrepute he might have brought the game into.

It's regrettable that he didn't leave the centre circle for 15 minutes. And of course he wishes now he'd decided to actually use the only piece of equipment a referee is meant to use. But give him a break. There were extenuating circumstances, such as Mike on occasion dressing up as a VAR monitor.

He also strongly denies the allegations regarding the cucumber, pineapple and 1 litre tub of vaseline.

We'd also like to strongly condemn the vicious and unnecessary hate Mike has been receiving, please refrain from adding to the vitriol.

We have strongly advised against future Mike Dean podcast appearances, but fully expect something like this to happen again in the near future.

**THIS IS A PARODY AND IS IN NO WAY THE OFFICIAL STANCE OF MIKE DEAN. PLEASE DON'T SUE ME**

02/09/2026

Fixing Transfer Deadline Day.

Deadline Day used to be so good. Jim White in a yellow tie. Harry Redknapp talking out a car window. Reporters getting bombarded outside stadiums. Real drama around the latest transfer news. Those times were special.

Nowadays we have over-inflated transfers and a feeling of disappointment. But there is a clear and easy way to fix deadline day and make it as good (if not better) as it once was.

Forget the transfer window. Forget medicals. Even Fabrizio can do one. Tell me this idea isn't way better...

26/08/2026

(TUTORIAL) How to bottle a 4-goal lead - Celtic Edition.

Celtic fans look away. After becoming the first ever team in Champions League history to lose a play-off tie after being 3 goals in front from the first leg, it seemed fitting to immortalise the feat in a quick, 5-step tutorial.

LASK from Austria just defeated the Scottish Champions after a heroic 5-1 win on the night. The game went to extra time and LASK even had time to miss a penalty.

So, if there are any teams out there that want to follow in the footsteps of Celtic, here's how to do it.

19/08/2026

**OFFICIAL TRAILER**

The Premier League returns again this week, but so too does something way more terrifying...

This August, one of the most anticipated horror films of the century lands on our dodgy boxes.

From the makers of Inglourious VARsterds, 28 VARs Later and VARanormal Activity.

The Premier League presents... VARMAGEDDON. Clear and obvious mistakes WILL be made.

18/08/2026

Part 1 of ranking all 20 Premier League stadiums to find out which team has the best chicken shops.

RULES:

1. Shop Density - How many chicken shops are within a 1.5km radius of the stadium. Kebab houses posing as chicken shops do not count. Must primarily sell poultry to be eligible.

2. Quality - Basically the best rating of any shop close to the stadium according to the reliable source of Google reviews. Must have over 50 reviews because I'm not having someone's uncle ruin this scientific process. I then double the review score to get score out of 10 (E.g. 4.3 x 2 = 8.6. Round up = 9/10).

3. Proximity - How close is the nearest chicken shop. Pretty self explanatory.

Then I combine the three scores and put them into the Chicken Premier League table, where after 20 teams have been rated, we will find out which one has the best chicken in the league.

If scores are tied, tie-breaker are the three individual criteria, starting with density.

Yes, I have thought this out meticulously.

So, why am I doing this? Some say boredom. Others say madness. I just say that I'm here answering the questions the people want answered.

First up was Hull, and who knew they'd have such a big chicken scene. Fair play.

16/08/2026

MARESCA OUT!

Get him out right now. Enzo Maresca is not the right manager for Man City.

They just lost the Community Shield 3-0 in a pathetic performance against Arsenal, and it doesn't get any better from here.

Just because you were Pep Guardiola's assistant, doesn't mean you're him. He's not the right man. The boring, non-clinical possession-based football isn't going to work.

Mark my words, City go down if Maresca stays. Get him out now before it's too late (*I'm not a City fan by the way, just someone who loves football and hates Maresca's style of play).

16/08/2026

3 Ways to make the Community Shield more relevant.

Let's be honest, 99% of fans do not care about this glorified friendly. So ahead of Arsenal taking on Man City in Cardiff, I came up with ways that would make it so much more interesting and important.

No longer will we see players strolling around acting like they're still on the beach.

No longer will VAR plague our game and spend 3 days deciding if a toe is offside in a game that doesn't matter.

These ideas will truly revolutionise the Community Shield as we know.

Follow if you can back them, or call me a donkey in the comments if you disagree.

12/08/2026

5 football Mandela effects, but 1 of them is made up!

Can you spot which Mandela effect is the imposter??

11/08/2026

Jeff Bezos buying Liverpool will be the WORST thing to happen to the club.

Just wait till he starts making decisions and turns it into an Amazon subsidiary.

Liverpool Prime replaces season tickets, players are handed zero-hour contracts, Alexa takes over the half-time team talks and suddenly next-day delivery doesn't seem so great when it refers to crossing.

Give it a year and Anfield could be one giant Amazon Locker, with Virgil van Dijk running the warehouse night shift. Liverpool fans, enjoy it while it lasts.

09/08/2026

Is Cristiano Ronaldo signing for Chelsea?

The transfer of the season, no, the CENTURY, is rumoured to be happening. Ronaldo to Chelsea is being talked about as a serious transfer, and it would be insane if he went to Stamford Bridge.

I truly think CR7 would win Chelsea the Premier League, and it's not even just what he'd do on the pitch. Off the pitch, his profile, experience and shirt sales alone would make it the best transfer in football history.

Tell me I'm wrong.

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