12/03/2026
I thought our first worldschooling trip was going to be all about fun, nature, showing the world to my child, teaching her about a part of her cultural Latin heritage and one of her native languages
Turns out it was about all of this but also about reconnecting deeply with my child and
very unexpectedly with my own inner child (that I’ve been unknowingly abandoning most of my life)
On this trip (almost 5 years into motherhood) the first years of mothering solo, which pretty much led into a burnout, started to finally make much more sense than ever before
My inner child said to me these months: “you’ve always tried to give all of yourself to others first, thinking that’s the healthiest and the best way to be, especially as a mother. And then you’re wondering why you disappeared in suffering, anger, invisibility, very little support and always overwhelmed?
You’re abandoning yourself
Why would you do that?
because early on in childhood you learned that love looked like giving everything, needing nothing, putting yourself last, making others comfortable, being responsible, being useful, being the one who holds it all together without expecting any help and that there is no room for you inside this love”
And it’s not just about motherhood, it’s about all relationships in life
but in motherhood everything always gets amplified, isn’t it?
do you recognize the feeling when every time you choose yourself, your needs, your timing, your joy, your boundaries, it feels like the opposite of love? As if you’re selfish and failing at loving others? You feel like it proves to you that you’re not as good as you should be and you feel super guilty
These 3 months worldschooling trip taught me that you will never be able to silence and “heal” the feeling of not-enoughness or too-muchness through more giving
because it comes from the wound which constantly asks for more self-sacrifice, and preferably in a perfect way
It heals through learning to repeatedly choose yourself with love.
Not instead of loving others.
But as an act of love toward the one person who has been waiting the longest to receive it from you
Yourself 💛