Gallery of Literature

20/03/2022

Somewhere between sunsets, I asked myself:

“Am I a sunset or sunrise?”

It occurred to me while driving that I’m more of a sunset type of person, not the latter.

I am the sunset who never gets to meet the sunrise, no matter how long I’ve waited.

Why can’t sunrise and sunset be together?

Why can’t we enjoy both at the same time?

Why can’t it be both coffee and tea?

Why can’t it simply be you and me?

I chase sunrise but sunrise never chases me.

I hide.

I come out.

I ran away.

I stayed.

I find myself crawling back to the shore,

Until the sea breeze whispered,

“There’s nothing more!”

Somewhere between sunsets,

I’ve learned to dance with my flaws

Crash the waves and wash the fears

Never get wet with my bucket of tears

Sunsets taught me to hold on to every spark of hope that I can grab.

Moon taught me to embrace darkness.

As I watch the sun veiled by a thick cirrus of clouds, I learned to gradually fade.

Fade as if there’s no tomorrow

Fade because this life is borrowed

Whenever I see a fish gets caught,

I sigh!

To some, life is a battle never fought

Bliss turns to sorrows

Sorrows into bliss

In between sorrows and bliss

Could there be anything I missed?

Sun departs to kiss a brand new day

I am a beautiful sunset who rolls with the days in the calendar.

I’ve taught countless of stars to shine

Even the brightest star failed to make you mine.

I felt the sand between my toes

And so I wonder, “Where did all those years go?”

Somewhere between sunsets, the answer came to me:

I am a dazzling sunset.

A mystic sunset I will be.

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Photograph Courtesy: Sebastian Voortman
Courtesy: https://goo.gl/KEP4fK
AS/Hutum/IM/Jane/Rogel/Amira/Naim/QC/UC
|| ©Gallery of Literature ||

31/07/2021

There are memories that stay locked firmly in my mind of which I am both unable and unwilling to let go of between us.
I find myself crawling through them from time to time, remembering what it was like to hold you so close.
Like an itch, scratching in the deepest chamber of my heart, thumping out its rhythm across our lives together.

I still think of those extra kisses crawling across my lips and swimming between each other’s teeth.

I think of that early morning moment where you crawled out of bed earlier than ever before just to look out the window as the sun crested the mountains.
A serene skyline, followed by the steam of a hot shower shared.
Gently caressing curves, pushing and pulling each other as the water flowed over our faces and laughter erupted from our chests.
The glitter of your brown eyes then has never left me.

Other times, the memories pass like a panic attack, like a war inside my brain.
As though I’m locked in that apartment of my mind, on the ground and unable to find my way back to you.
I’m having the damndest time picking myself up again, processing all that has passed.
Now all I want to do is crawl my way against your lap.
Fingernails digging, clawing into the carpet like yours used to into my flesh.
I’m pulling myself towards that shut door that might never reopen itself.
I can still see your footprints on the floor, each depression unable to bounce back from the weight of what passed between us.

But now, when I twist the k**b and feel the heat of the shower, I see you in my memory.
You’re like a shady cloud of burning ash whispering in my ear.
Your face is dark, but simultaneously as bright as the day we met.
Infected by my gloom, but still smiling as though all of this will come to pass.
I press my lips on yours, and I taste silken darkness, sweetened with bitter dirt.
Like a specter out of time, but in my mind I know it’s not you here, alive.

I am haunted by those kisses, the ones signed crimson at the bottom of every note you ever left me.
They beat violently through my veins and orchestrate a symphony of panic in my brain.
They are moments of joy that I’ll never reclaim in the same way ever again.
They’re crawling away from me as the beat of time presses ever onward.

As I move to grip the doork**b and fo**le the lock, I realize the keys are missing from my pocket, and I might never make it back into the shattered heart apartment locked in my chest. I’ll just have to keep crawling back through all of us instead.

I am not numb to what I have done, to the pain I have caused. But I hope someday I might hear your key fall into the tumbler lock of our love.

29/05/2021

The universe will turn to you without asking if you’re ready, and it’ll give you precisely what you wanted, even if it comes in a different package. It will open the door you haven’t seen and push you through without first knocking.

And there you will face first with change and very likely afraid.
When the world looks different, and your balance feels off, and your worries start climbing up your heart.
This will be the moment when your limits will be tested and your potential will be stretched.

You will have a choice between standing still or standing tall,despite it all.
You will have a choice between facing this change or closing your eyes and trying to run away.
You will have a choice to be fuelled by fear or ruled by fear. And darling, I hope you choose wisely.

Because I know what it is like to be afraid.
I know what it’s like to procrastinate on my dreams because I’m too afraid to see if I can do it.
I know what it’s like to have a taste of success and then question the flavor.
I know what it’s like to play games with myself—over and over again.

But I also know that this dance with destiny is not something I can continue doing.
There will be a moment when the world will stop coddling you and force you to step into who you were meant to be.
There will come a time when the universe will toss you into the ring and tell you to win this thing.

When you’re launched into unstable grounds and unsure how you will even be found, I hope you don’t just look fear in the face;
I hope you smile as you introduce yourself.

There will come a time when you will have a choice to cave or to engrave your story in the sky for everyone else to see. You will have a choice to be a playful part of your life or just to watch your life play out. You will have the option to continue to wait for inspiration or to inspire everyone else.

And if, even after knowing all of this, you still feel yourself questioning your power, then I ask you to remember just one more thing. You would not be faced with this opportunity, this challenge, or this moment if you could not handle it. The universe is daring you to stop settling and to affirm every wish you’ve ever made.

So when you feel unbalanced or afraid, come back to your purpose.
Come back to what puts a spark in your soul.
Come back to what lights you up.
Come back to inner knowing and know that you are unlike anyone else.

There will be a day when you are called to be brave.

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Photograph Courtesy: instagram.com/zozo.soumi

Courtesy: https://goo.gl/KEP4fK
AS/Hutum/IM/Sonya/ExpressInward/Matej/Riordan/QC/UC
|| ©Gallery of Literature ||

16/05/2021

You’re allowed to close the doors that failed you.
The doors that didn’t welcome you in and made your stay a little more comfortable.
The doors that pulled you in promising to keep you warm only to make your stay cold and lonely.
You’re allowed to close the doors that brought you pain and locked you in. You’re allowed to close the doors that didn’t set you free.

You’re allowed to close the doors that didn’t bring you closure or justice.
The ones you opened a little longer in an attempt to be the bigger person or the more forgiving person.
The doors that didn’t honor your presence.
The doors that looked pretty and joyful from the outside but turned dark and gloomy the moment you stepped inside.

Know which ones make you feel at home and which ones suffocate you but no matter what you do, close the doors that lead to nowhere.
And while you’re at it, close the doors of the painful past, the sudden heart wrench, the unforeseen losses and all the ways you failed yourself. Close the doors that didn’t appreciate or celebrate you.
The doors that made you feel restless and stuck.
The doors that became too heavy to open and too dull to look at.
The doors that started to make more sense when you left them behind.

Because the thing about closing doors is that it teaches you how to walk away, how to find new doors that could embrace you, how to walk into something and have the courage to walk out once you realize that you don’t belong there. You’re allowed to change your mind about the doors you once had the keys to and give the keys back as you exit gracefully. It’s time to leave behind the doors that ripped you out of your joy or your self-worth or your value and you’re allowed to keep trying every key until you open the door that feels right. The door that has your name on it.

The door that feels like home.

:-+ naim

08/11/2020

Don’t treat her like she’s second-best.
Don’t chase her if she’s not the one you truly want to be with.
Don’t play games just so you can get over someone who never loved you or someone who abandoned you.

Don’t ask her personal questions.
Don’t let her open up to you about her past, her childhood or her fears.
Don’t let her reveal her heart to you if you’re not ready to love her.
Don’t ask for a place in her heart if you’re not planning on staying there.

Don’t gaze into her eyes and whisper softly in her ears.
Don’t tell her your secrets and talk to her for hours because you know that she will do her best to comfort you and she will stay up all night with you until you fall asleep. Don’t awaken her love if you’re not ready to love her. Don’t hold her if you’ll easily let her go. Don’t claim her if you can’t be the one she needs.

Don’t stop her from finding the one who would put her first.
Don’t act like you’re jealous or you’re committed when you know she’s in your life to fill a void.
Don’t lie to her and tell her that she’s the only one when you’re still juggling.
Don’t treat her like a fool because you’re only fooling yourself.

If she’s not your first choice, please leave.
Leave and don’t disturb her peace. Leave instead of half-loving her.
Leave instead of lying to her. Leave because she doesn’t need you. Leave because she will eventually leave you.

Naim

28/09/2019

As we fall and rise through life, we need to remember to be soft. I think we all start off being soft but somewhere along the line, our vision gets blurred and we tend to lose our essence. We get bitter, our hearts harden, we stop giving as much and lock ourselves up. This is a normal reaction to getting hurt and getting disappointed but maybe you need to give yourself a chance to be soft a million times over.

Hearted people is what the world really needs. The world needs people who have empathy, who are kind and loving and who are not afraid to show it or to give in large doses. In a world where sadness, anger and suffering exist, we need those who can take the hits and shake them off. We need those who can heal others and give them hope by being an example.

Having a heart means you refuse to let the world change you. It means that you are strong and brave and willing to stand up after every difficult round and open your heart to the world again. It means that you choose to stand by yourself and give the world what it needs more of.

No matter how much you’ve been hurt, you can always heal and it’s often by opening your heart to the world again, by choosing to see the good and to be good.

You should never force yourself to be soft, but when you feel those tender, giving, sweet thoughts and feelings coming to the surface, don’t lock them away in a cage because you feel threatened and fear being hurt. The truth is, we all need soft people in our lives, people who love us, light our way, who are gentle, kind and sweet. It helps us survive. Imagine being that for someone, imagine being the reason someone learns to trust others and open their heart again.

Humans have an immense capacity to give and be highly compassionate and it’s in the ways that we can give back to the world and our fellow humans that we feel truly fulfilled and accomplished.

To be soft is to care for others, it is lifting others up as much your lift your own soul. It is seeing past bad behavior from a point of view of compassion, understanding, and acceptance. To be soft, you have to always forgive others and yourself. To be soft, you have to let love and gentleness flow through you. To be soft, you must not shy away from your heart and always remember that the world always deserves a second chance.

Amira

18/08/2019

28/07/2019

You had a dream of white picket fences.
Life was lovely and predictable and magnificent
because you were living it out with the one who makes your heart skip a beat.

You had a dream of dancing till the sun came up and falling into a king-sized bed with white sheets and fluffy pillows and ordering room service that was way too expensive,but it didn’t matter because you were there with the one who made your heart skip a beat.

You had dreams of rocking chairs on front porches and wrinkled hands clasped for the rest of your days as you watched the grandkids play on the front lawn.

You had a dream of visiting cities that you’ve always read about, trying food that you’ve never heard of, and meeting strangers in every place you land.
It didn’t matter that you were miles and miles from the only home that you’d ever known because you were traveling the world with the one who makes your heart skip a beat, and your home was wherever you both were together.

And then one day the heart doesn’t skip a beat.

One day it breaks.

It smashes.

It’s pulverized into a million pieces, and the dreams you had, the life you were living, and the love that made you warm and fuzzy daily, were gone.

Just like that.

And suddenly the world feels cold.

And you cling to that.

20/07/2019

Maybe right now, your journey is about being alone.
Maybe this is the season you are being challenged,to learn how to wake up in the middle of the bed,
to finally find hope in the vacancy, hope in the quiet, hope in the way you stretch into your life and give yourself permission to take up space within it.

Maybe right now, you are being shown that you can take care of yourself,
that you can depend on the person you have become, that you can be your own home no matter what comes your way.

Maybe right now, your journey is about redemption.
Maybe this is the season you are being challenged to make amends with your heart,
to stand up for the vast ways in which it loves, and cares, and believes in the goodness of vulnerability, and expression,
and being the person who softens even when the world is not gentle.

Maybe right now you are getting a second chance,to trust in it, and to forgive yourself for giving it away to those who could not value it;
but most importantly, maybe right now you are being called to protect it, to find your way back into your tenderness, to find your way back into your soul.

No, maybe right now your journey isn’t about love. Maybe, right now, your journey is about hope.
Maybe this is the season you are being challenged to remind yourself of the beauty life has to offer you.
Maybe right now, you are being given the space to discover the kinds of places that leave your bones dripping with feeling,
the kinds of songs that are yours and yours alone, the kinds of people who love you in a way that does not seek to change you.

Maybe right now, you are being given a chance to reclaim your joy, to make it the most natural extension of who you are,
to let it spill out of your words, and your laughter, and your tears to let it be something you believe you are worthy of,
to let it be something you believe you deserve.

Maybe right now your journey is about you.
Maybe this is the season you are being challenged to be your own savior, to be your own safe place.

Maybe right now you are being reminded that the people who walked away were only ever leading you back to yourself, were only ever leading you here.
Here, you are healing.

13/07/2019

I honestly do not know to heal. I lost my way. I know I cannot keep going on like this.
All I know is that somewhere down the line, some incidents must have hit me hard.
I am not even sure what broke me or what can mend me which is also part of a painful realization.
I wish I knew the magic formula of how to take care of myself and eventually heal myself.
It feels as if I was walking in a field of roses and now I am walking on shattered glass.

And the thing is, I always feel guilty for it.
I feel guilty for not knowing how to fix myself, for not laughing like I used to, for not opening my heart like I used to.
I used to do it so well. I used to welcome the world with such open arms.
I wish I knew how to regain what I was so skillful at.

My pain always creeps up and is deep-seated.
It’s the kind of sadness that wears you and sleeps and wakes up with you every night and morning.
The intensity and consistency of it shocks me and those around me.
It is paralyzing me. It is wanting to feel light but feeling as heavy as the ocean.
It is wanting to run but barely managing to walk.

Others try to guide me but it breaks my heart to see them spend their energy and their love with no positive result.
I know it is my job to take care of myself.
It is my job to heal and trace all the places where it hurts and replace them with a warm blanket.
It is my responsibility to see where my feelings were neglected and acknowledge and validate them.
It is my duty to change my perception and accept my experiences as part of my journey in this life without grudges.
It is time to fly.

Although, I don’t know how I am going to reach there. I am going to start by believing.
I am going to believe that beautiful moments are ahead of me.
I am going to believe in the other side of pain.
I am going to believe I can heal.

And, I am going to choose to let my heart mend and not drown in chaos.
I am going to give myself space, acceptance, love and no certain timeline to do it.

06/07/2019

What is it about her that makes you smile?
That makes the butterflies flutter uncontrollably in your stomach when you see her.
That gives you goosebumps with just one graze of her finger on your arm.
That intense urge of needing to be in her presence and a feeling of loss when she is not around.

The way you giggle at her jokes, dumbfounded at how everyone around you is not impressed at her humor.
How her charm sends you melting into a warm puddle beneath you every time she opens a smile for you.
How your lips tremble as she draws closer towards you with one hand masking the side of your cheek while the other accompanies your hand.

You’ve cried hard over her. she has stood you up on many occasions, cancelled plans with you.
she has repeatedly broken promises to you, knowing from the start she could not uphold them.
she called you every night filled with happiness and desire but turned her feelings off during the day when others were around.

You hid your attraction to one another for months, until the secrecy was too much to bare.
Yet you still winced every time someone would ask you about her, knowing that it wasn’t exactly a relation to describe whatever it was.
And every time you thought you were done playing the rollercoaster of games, her name reappears on your phone sucking you back in to what feels like a never-ending ride.

Out of all the ladies that have caught your eye, that you’ve dated, your heart, what is it about her that constantly has you yearning for more?
What is it about her that has captivated your attention more than anyone else, despite the pain?

What makes your heart jump when your phone rings, hoping it is her on the other end?
What makes your heart race when she says that she wants to see you after it had been months since your last embrace?
And what makes you agree to letting her spend the night even though you know that the morning will only bring more tears and heartache?

You may not ever know what it was about her that compelled your heart, but you do know what it was about her that broke it.