Geopack ventures

24/11/2024

Unakumbuka ukisema salamu bila pesa means nothing 😂 tena ukasema no money no love ukaongezea you can't date a hustler 😂alafu ukasema you don't do men below 40yrs😌😌 ukasema you can't hustle na kuna wanaume WA pesa 😂 ukisalamiwa ulkua unajibu your are not my type oooh I can't love you coz you dress in mtumbaa 😂 ukasema mambo mingi my hustlers wakaachana na wewe wakakuachia wadosi😃😃😂sai umetambarizwa uko Tu sasa kuchafulia wanaume ulkua unakataa majina aty ooh men are dogs ooh men are not serious ooh men don't want to marry you with your kids😂oooh pastor saidia😪🤣🤣badala wanaume wakutafte ni ww sasa wa naeza toa wapi mwanaume atanipenda na watoto wangu😁😂 oooh somebody to love and dont judge my past😪😪🤣aty bora tu anapumua pesa mtatafta wote 😔😔wakati walikutaka ukiwa bado shining ulisema huwezi tafta na mwanaume pesa ukaaacha pride ikakutawala😌😌wanaume wako wazuri sema tu ni ww ulijiharibia mwenyewe 😊😊🙏

23/11/2024

“😭😭😭kumbe kukaa na dem lazima mkule breakfast daily.😢 alichukua my favourite towel akaifanya duster aty juu nimeitumia for 9 years.😭huskii hadi nimetafutiwa uniform za kulala. 🙄actually nilidhani fruits ni za harusi ama christmass..😂saii nazikula daily k**a mgonjwa.🫢
Bana shopping ni mara mbili kwa wiki na blueband ni lazima, 🙄nilikuwa nimezoea kitunguu na nyanya then royco..saii nimejua spices zote hadi puplica 🫢sijui mawat. kwanza nalalia pillows za pink. 🙆kitu ingine hanunui nyanya za 10 na kitunguu moja...anaokota kila kitu kwa kibanda bana⛹️⛹️⛹️ nilidhani kuoga ni sabuni ya kipande na kagunia..msee nilibuyiwa gloves na scented soap..naoga k**a chiwawa😂😂🙆then glass zangu za maji zilitupwa zote na vile hizo yoghurts zilikuwa expensive plus kuosha hizo mikebe🤔🤔
introducing towel in my house was the greatest shock, nilizoea nikimaliza kuoga najitingiza k**a mbwa nakauka😂⛹️ I thought mtu huoga akienda town but guess what naoga ata nikienda kulala....Hadi nmeanza ata kukuwa brown brown😂😂😂
☺️

15/08/2024

HUU HAPA UTATUZI WA UUME LEGEVU NA KUWAHI KUFIKA KILELENI KWA MWANAUME. Soma hapa CHANZO, DALILI NA TIBA YAKE.

Yamkini wewe ni miongoni mwa wanaume wanaoteseka na tatizo hili na bado hujui sehemu ya kupata utatuzi wake. Wahi sasa ujiunge na tiba iliyoonyesha maajabu kwa wengi waliokuwa na tatizo hili, hujachelewa bado.

Miongoni mwa matatizo makubwa kabisa yanayowakabili wanaume katika suala la kujamiiana ni kuwahi kufika kileleni mapema kabla ya wapenzi wao.

Malalamiko yanayotolewa na baadhi yao yanakariri kwamba, muda wa kumaliza tendo huwa kati ya nusu dakika na dakika tatu kwa tendo la kwanza, huku wengine wakipoteza hamu katika hatua za awali tu za hamasa ya kimahaba. Hata hivyo suala la kutangulia kufika kileleni kabla ya mwanamke limekuwa likiwahuzunisha wanaume walio wengi.

Ndoa na wapenzi wengi wameachana kwa kasoro hii waliyonayo wanaume. Karibu kila kona kunasikika vilio toka kwa wanaume wakilalamika kukabiliwa na tatizo la ufikaji kileleni mapema, ambalo limewafanya waonekane sio keki kwa wapenzi wao, na tatizo hili ni kubwa miongoni mwa matatizo ya upungufu wa nguvu za kiume.

Vyanzo vya upungufu wa nguvu za kiume ni vingi sana navyo ni:

1)UPIGAJI PUNYETO MARA KWA MARA
2)MSONGO WA MAWAZO
3)MAZINGIRA YASIYORIDHISHA KUFANYA TENDO LANDOA
4)ULEVI ULIOKITHIRI
5)KUPOOZA/KUUGUA STROKE
6)KUUGUA KISUKARI KWA MUDA MREFU
7)ULAJI MBOVU WA VYAKULA HASA VYAKULA
VYENYE MAFUTA MENGI
8)KUTUMIA DAWA ZA KEMIKALI eg, vi**ra, estrogen, diuretic, tranquillizers, digoxin, NK
9)KUUMIA KWA GROIN
10)KIWANGO KIDOGO CHA TESTERON
11)KUUGUA CHANGO LA KIUME AU NGIRI

DALILI ZA UPUNGUFU WA NGUVU ZA KIUME
Mwanaume anayekabiliwa na tatizo Hilo la nguvu za kiume huwa na Dalili zifuatazo:

A) KUKOSA HAMU YA KUFANYA TENDO LA NDOA
Huwa Hanauwezo wa kutamani kufanya tendo la ndoa, tatizo hili husababishwa na msongo wa mawazo

B) KUTOKUA NA UWEZO WA KUSIMAMISHA UUME
Hali hii hutokea kutokana na kutokuwepo kwa
mzunguko wa damu wa kutosha Kwenye uume, pia kulegea kwa misuli ya uume.

05/08/2024

POSSIBLE REASONS WHY YOUR HUSBAND DON'T WANT TO HAVE S*X WITH YOU.

1. CHECK YOUR ATTITUDE
No matter how s*xy you are or dress, if you have a bad attitude, your husband will struggle to desire you. If you are ever complaining, negative, bitter, cold; he will keep off

2. CHECK HIS STRESS LEVELS
S*x starts in the mind. When a man is mentally strained, his p***s will struggle to erect. Worry and desire don't mix

3. CHECK YOUR HYGIENE
Your husband might want to do stuff to your body but if you don't keep clean or take showers, he might find it difficult to do more than just pe*******on

4. CHECK HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH P**N
A husband who is addicted to p**n or ma********on will rarely make s*xual advances on you, you will be in competition with the fantasies in his mind and on his phone, not to mention his hand. If he is addicted, don't judge him; support him to break the habit

5. CHECK YOUR TONE
The wife's tone can easily turn off a man. A wife's tone can even make a husband keep coming home late, not because he is cheating but because her tone is unwelcoming. Does your husband enjoy your company or do you expect him to love your presence even when you are harsh to him? If he won't enjoy your presence, he won't desire you

6. CHECK YOUR PAST RESPONSE TO HIS ADVANCES
Many wives turn down the husband's advances then expect he will easily come back when she eventually wants pleasure. Men get tired too. The more you poor cold water on his advances, the more you push him away

7. CHECK IF YOU PRAISE ANOTHER MAN MORE THAN HIM
If you are ever praising your pastor, ex, father, brother, boss, favourite celebrity or another woman's husband whilst you belittle him; you will bruise his ego. Men make love with their ego. Bruise his ego and you will discourage his fire for you.

8. CHECK HOW YOU TREAT HIM IN PUBLIC AND PRIVATE
If you disrespect him or talk down at him in front of others or the children, it will affect him just like it would affect you if he did it to you.

03/05/2024

My wife and I had an issue this morning before we left for work. It was a small misunderstanding between me and her.

We were both angry with each other. From my facial expression, my wife knew I was very prepared to keep malice with her that morning. She was also angry and didn't mind playing along.

I stepped out of the house and she locked the doors and followed me behind. Since we don't have a car, we always board the same bus to work every morning and ensure we sit together- side by side on the bus.

I was to drop at Manda hill and she was to drop at zesco.

But today, I didn't want to sit close to her. So I sat at the back seat and she sat in front, just beside a good-looking Police officer.

The man glanced at my wife. I saw the way he looked at her hair and face with so much admiration. Then he told her she looked beautiful. My wife smiled and told him thank you.

He asked my wife where she was going and she told him she was heading to work.

All this while, I was sitting behind and listening to their conversation.

"My name is Mwansa Mweemba. I am a police officer as you can see from my uniform. I was just posted to Lusaka a month ago. Right now I am heading to my place of assignment."

My wife nodded her head. When the conductor requested for my wife to pay her transport fare, the officer offered to pay. He pulled out a K50 and Said Two.

My wife thanked him and smiled.

Then the officer continued.

"So I will be dropping soon at Munali I am accommodated at Chelston Police Camp. I don't know if you can drop by someday to say hello to me. Can I have your number?"

I didn't waste any more time. I tapped my wife on her shoulders immediately.

She turned.

And then I asked her.

"Hope you remembered to put a spoon inside Kasubas lunch box? You know you always forget."

My wife was puzzled. She was probably wondering who Kasuba is, and why I had chosen to talk to her. Before she could ask any further questions I added.

"Try to pick her up from school earl

29/04/2024

A beer company was hiring a taster, Someone to taste the beers before they are taken for selling. So they placed adverts and one afternoon, my friend walked into the manager's office asking to be employed.

The manager tried to figure out how he could drive him away but couldn't come up with an idea, so he decided to give him a trial. He ordered his secretary to give him a glass of wine 🍷

He took a sip and said, "It's Red wine, Varietal, three years old, grown on rift valley, matured in steel containers."

"That's correct!" The manager exclaimed, "Well give him another one let's see." So he was given.

He took a sip again and said, "It's Guinness, a combination of barley, roast malt extract, and brewers yeast brewed around Thika road in Nairobi, Kenya 2 years ago"

"Incredible!" said the manager.

Now the manager went closer to the secretary and whispered to her saying, "Go get some of your urine in a cup let's see if he will get that."

So my friend was given the cup of urine. He took a sip, turned to the manager and said, "Female urine, 26 years old, 2 weeks pregnant and if I'm not given this job, Sir I will tell your wife who is responsible for the pregnancy"

both the manager and the secretary fainted.

My friend got the job.🚶🏼‍♂️🚶🏼‍♂️🚶🏼‍♂️🚶🏼‍♂️🚶🏼‍♂️🚶🏼‍♂️🚶🏼‍♂️

29/03/2024

Girls at the age of 18-24 years always attract serious men who are fully ready to marry them, but at this age most of our girls/sisters never wish to hear anything about marriage.
1. I'm too young for that.
2. Who cares about marriage.
3. I'm focused on my books.
4. I want to gather some money first.
5. Marriage is full of problems.
These are some of few statements ladies talk of at their youth age.
But these girls will be having serious & series of s*x relationship with small boys of their age, because at that age, they always have high rate of boys, guys and men coming for them, but they will prefer to choose those boys rather than the real men who want to marry them. They are still young to marry right, but they are not young to have s*x with boys.
No problem, God is watching you.

At age of 25-27, parents will start asking them the following questions;
1. How far?
2. Don't you have any one yet ?
3. Are you not planning to get married ?
4. Are you seeing that all your mates are getting married ?
5. Don't you know you are getting old?
But mind you, parents only see the outside of their daughters, not knowing there is nothing left inside.
With all these questions by her own parents, she will now be thinking and asking herself things like: My mates are marrying,
1. Does it mean am old enough to marry?
2. Hmmm, how should I go about it?
3. My boyfriends are not serious about asking my hand in marriage.
4. They are not even ready to marry yet.
5. Well, God knows the best. I believe in God.
See oooh...!, she has started putting her blame on God. "God's time is the best" OK, I agree for argument sake.
At age 27-30 they now start looking for men to marry not boys to have s*x and play with again.
They will start looking for serious relationship that will lead to marriage, but unfortunately, at this age of 27-30 not all men will be asking their hand in marriage.
You will see them forcing themselves to marry a man who don't want to marry them. Please we beg you, leave us al

01/07/2023

S*X IS SWEET.!!! - BUT READ TO THE END
DEAR WOMEN, KINDLY SHARE THIS TO EVERY MAN ON UR LIST TO SHARE THIS TOO
(A MUST READ)
Most downfalls of men are caused by MULTIPLE girlfriends.
S*x is a spiritual encounter I stand to be corrected, not every girl has a good spirit,some are demon, some has
poison in between their legs, some are killers and destiny destroyers, be careful. Worst is a man who can't control his s*xual urge. A man who can control
his s*xual urge is a man who can live many years on earth.
1. Having many girlfriends does not make you a man. It only makes you a womanizer and a cheat and a boy.
2. A real man has only one woman in his life.
3. For the fact that you are good in bed does not make you a man. A real man is the man who does not run away from his responsibility but faces it squarely.
4. You don't need to sag your trousers and walk round the street before girls will love you. Infact it is only small boys that sag trousers and it is premature little
girls that fall in love with men who sag trousers.
5. Don't use and dump ladies. Remember the law of karma. Whatever you do, you will receive the reward.
6. If you cannot make her your wife, don't make her a mother. If she can't be your wife don't sleep with her.
7. Do not obey your er****on at all times. Most times our er****ons mislead us to the wrong direction. Control your er****on. Don't let your er****on control you. If you
don't you will have few days on earth with much poverty on you. You may insult me but it doesn't matter to me now, because am done telling you this.
8. It is not everything you see under skirt that you should hustle to eat, some skirts contain snakes that will bite you and leave you uncomfortable. Control your
s*x urge. Self control and abstinence in most cases pays a lot.
9. Do not date a lady because she has s*xy curves, b***s and shapes. Those things are just packaging; and
packaging can be very deceptive avoid such, don't fall for wats called the irony of social Media.
10. Respect any lady that loves you. Yes, its not easy for a lady to throe her love on you and support your future.
11. Do not beat any woman, even if she is not your wife.
12. Real men don't gossip. Learn to keep secret shared with you by any Lady that is what makes you a man enough to enjoy the comfort of a lady.
13. The world only celebrates successful men. Nobody will celebrate you for having many girlfriends. Therefore
what is the benefit? Waste of energy and waste of protein.
14.Marrying a woman doesn't mean she is your property, Treat her with respect ..Make her your queen,love her, honour her and give her a reason to
treat you the same. Remember, what you give is what you get.
Finally Don’t be a cheating man. You’re losing life. You think you are playing the game and winning, but you are
actually losing. You can get over on some women but you can’t fool your Creator. You will reap what you sow,
so you better start trying to grow good things. Juggling women doesn’t make you a man. Being honest, loyal & faithful. May God bless your relationship.

31/12/2022

*MYSTERY OF DNA*

(A MUST READ)

If you have S*X with a man, his DNA lives in you forever.

Workman noted that a research by university of Seattle USA has proven that;
There is now a greater understanding of why God asks us not to have S*X before we get married.

*This research proves that any man, that a woman has S*X with leaves a part of his DNA in the woman*.

The man who has had more S*X with her, leaves more of his DNA in the woman. So when a woman ovulates, the eggs that she produces contain more of other DNAs.

So we need to educate the girl child to remain a virgin till marriage.

*Anytime you have S*X with another man you become one with that man (spiritually too) and carry the man's DNA and according to Workman this is called S*X Web especially when the woman has multiple S*X partners*.

At some point when you have too many of the male DNA in you; you change, because your cells are changing.

That also proves why when married couples live together for a long time they end up looking alike. *The woman's DNA changes when she has s*x with men*. This is very serious.

*The world should know this and stop silly S*X promotions*.

It is bad than good.
Unfortunately women are the victims.

This was found out in many other research articles mostly released this year. So it is new and we all have to know.

*The fact is,women retain DNA from every man they have slept with*.

Cells transferred from a man to a woman during in*******se become integrated into the woman's body after S*X, every single time they have S*X.

*This study found the presence of genetically distinct male cells in the brain of women*. This also means these other male cells will be found in a foetus when the woman gets pregnant.

(This is called microchimerism.)

*Every male you absorb s***m from becomes a living part of your life*. S***m is a living substance. Living cells. It enters your bloodstream and collects in your brain and spine.

*Stop experimenting with S*X*.

24/12/2022

A bottle of water is sold by a hawker at 20 shillings. The same bottle of water is sold at a supermarket at 50 shillings. The same bottle of Water is sold at a bar at 100 shillings. The same bottle of water is sold in a good restaurant at 200 shillings. The same bottle of water is sold at the airport at 500 shillings. Same brand same product. The only thing that changes is the location. Sometimes you have to change your location to change your value. Dont belittle yourself and stay at a place where your not given the value for what you deserve. Have the courage and change your location because your valuable
Merry Christmas

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30/11/2022

ICANJAMA NA MÎNYONYO YA AGÎKÛYÛ SATURDAYS
1. Kûhotha dowry through WhatsApp groups.
2. Kûracia mbere ya mûirîtu ûria Mûkûrû aracitie
3. Gûtua mwatî na harika mbeca
4. Gwîtia ithîgî na mûndû ahikire na agîciara tene
5. Kûhingîrîria mûndû ûhikanîtie kîhingo
6. Gûtua Njohi ya mûratina fanta kana tusker kana mbeca
7. Kwaga kûracia marigû ma mûraru, mûnjûû na mûtahato
8. Gûthiî ûthoni mûkîrîte andû 20
9. Kuuma ûthoni ûtukû kana kûrara
10. Kûhe athoni nyama cia ngûkû
11. Kûgûra mwatî na harika thoko ûcoke ûkaracie
12. Kuuga mbu/ wapi nduru ûthoni. Kûu ni kugeka kîhiko
13. Kûhumbîra airîtu na mashuka ati mûrûme acagûre
14. Athoni kûheyo nyama ciî na mahîndî mathûgûnage ta ngui.
15. Aa Mama na aa Agendi kwaga kûneyo ngoima ciao
16. Kwanjia ûthoni utahatite mîruru.
17. Kûracia Mûkaguo Ena ihu
18. Gukunya mbakî ûkîroka ûthoni
19. Gûthiî ûthoni ûnyuîte Njohi
20. Atumia gwikira nguo cia cumîcumî magîthiî ûthoni
Kiriungi Wa Kîmotho Mûceera wa mbarî ya huria nondîrariunga weerû ngiugaga nî thaayû na nî thaayû

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28/11/2022

DANGEROUS GÎKÛYÛ MIGIRO

Mûgiro nî ûndû mûkananie. Ûngiuna mûgiro mûndû anyitagwo nî THAHU naguo Thahu Ûkarehe Kîrumi nakîo Kîrumi gîkarehe Gîkuû.

1. Nî mûgiro mûndûrûme kuonga nyondo cia mûka kana muhiki. Wonga , ucio wonga atuikaga nyûkwa

2. Nî mûgiro kuonana kîmwîrî na mutumia Ena mambura ( menstruation). Gwîka ûguo ûtûraga ûrûrûraga na thahu na mûico gîkuû

3. Nî mûgiro gûthiî kana kuuma ûthoni ûtuku. Wauma ûthoni ûtukû ,ûrakaragia ngomi cia kwa mûirîtu mûciî

4. Nî mûgiro gwîkîra gîthuma ( condom) tondu ûcio nî ûragani. Kwaga gwîkîra condom ti kuuga ûkarware HIV/ AIDS na STIs. Ni kwirwo ukindirie kwa Mûkaguo

5. Nî mûgiro kûnyua ndawa kana gûthecwo cindano îngîgiria mutumia ohe nda. Mwana akûre ee nda. Gîkûyû believes in natural family planning

6. Nî mûgiro gûkunya mbakî ûkîroka igongona

7. Nî mûgiro kwaga kûracia na noûrakoma na mûkaguo

8.Nî mûgiro mûirîtu mûgîkûyû guota mwaki akinyîte mahiga.

9. Nî mûgiro mûthuri mûgîkûyû gûkua mwana na ngoi

10.Nî mûgiro mûndû wa Nja kwagarara gîthima kîa maaî kana irio ciî riiko mambura ma mûtumia Mee igûrû. Gwîka ûguo nî kûroga andû aku na kûmathiûrûra

11. Nî mûgiro mûtumia kûraria nguo cia mwana nja( yetagwo ngoi). Angika ûguo ciahûragwo na kamûtî ikîûragio ûraire kû

12. Nî mûgiro gûthiî mathiko matakwîgiî

13. Nî mûgiro mûthuri kûmîa nyûmba .

14. Ni mûgiro mûirîtu gûturamîra irio ciî riiko

15. Nî mûgiro gukoma na mûtumia mûkuire

16. Nî mûgiro kûgîa na ndûgû cia macakayainî

17. Nî mûgiro mûthuri kuona njaga ya mwarî

18. Nî mûgiro mûthuri gûkoma rûgito

19. Nî mûgiro mûtumia gutagarara mûthuri

20. Nî mûgiro Mūtumia kūnyita nyau mūting'oe ( wîtaûrîre gaka)

21. Nî mûgiro kûhata nja kana nyûmba ûtukû amu noûhate arangîri aa Mûciî kana thigari cigîûka kûrandûra mathiirî.

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03/07/2022

Karua labelled the DP as unfit for the presidency.

02/07/2022

The two were reportedly driving alone with no security when the incident occurred in the outskirts of Nairobi Town.

14/02/2022

Hapa kuna kaukweli

13/11/2021

A Maasai man walks into a bank in NAIROBI and asks for the loan officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to DUBAI on business for four weeks and needs to borrow 5,000. The bank officer tells him that bank will need some form of security for the loan, so the maasai manhands over the keys to a brand new Mercedes Benz S class 500 parked on the street in front of the bank.produces the log book and everything checks out. The loan officer agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all enjoy a good laugh at the maasai for using a KSH 15 Million Mercedes Benz as collateral against a 5,000 loan. An employee of the bank then drives the Mercedes Benz into the bank's underground garage and parks it there. Four weeks later, the maasai returns, repays the 5,000 and the interest, which comes to 150.41. The loan officer says 'Sir, we are very happy to have had your business & this transaction has worked out very nicely but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out & found that you are a multi millionaire. What puzzles us is, why would you bother to borrow 5,000 The Masai man replies: 'Where else in NAIROBI can I park my car four weeks for only 150.41 and expect it to be there when I return???

27/08/2021