12/11/2022
A WEEK IS A LONG TIME, here are 30 stories that made the news this week...
1. An Anti-Corruption Court in Nairobi this week finally allowed the Director of Public Prosecution (DPP) Mr. Noordin Haji to withdraw a graft case against Deputy President Rigathi Gachagua. Mr Gachagua, who has been in office for the last two months, faced a Sh7.3 billion graft case. However, the magistrate said that should investigators get new evidence, he risks being re-arrested. Yeah, we believe him…
2. Members of Parliament have threatened to down tools if National Government Constituency Development Fund (NG-CDF) monies are not disbursed to their constituencies by next week. Minority Leader Opiyo Wandayi asked parliamentarians not to engage in any business of parliament if the funds are not disbursed.
3. Charlene Ruto has been meeting people on behalf of the Kenyan government or on behalf of herself, no one knows. This week she met the Moroccan Minister of Youth, Culture & Communication, Mohammed Mehdi and then she met young parliamentarians in the Moroccan Government and now you people are crying tears of a painful stomach, saying you didn’t kick out dynasties only for Ruto to start a new one… some of you are saying you want a detailed report from the government, clarifying if Charlene Ruto is the new CS for Devolution.
4. President William Ruto has been making announcements left right and center this week… Hustler Fund loan will be given to ‘Micro’ businesses that will be able to pay a small fee (not cool), Kenya Power (KPLC) will no longer charge new customers Sh70,000 for connecting electricity (cool), pensioners acquire land through the affordable housing plan (somewhat cool). Etc etc.
5. Those who have been talking about how poor Siaya people are… this one is for you. Tuna factory ya jus. Governor James Orengo commissioned Ramba Fruit Processing Factory in East Asembo Ward, Rarieda Constituency. You can’t tell us nothing.
6. Kenyan mortuary attendants want the Kenyan government to recognize them as medical practitioners. The morticians are adamant that they will not relent until the government recognized and awarded them benefits enjoyed by other medics.
“With entry points and scheme of service, morticians will at least feel as part of the medical community,” they added. They made the demand during the first-ever mortician conference, held at Tom Mboya Labour College in Kisumu. If they were not considered medics all this time, what were they?
7. Pastor James Ng'ang'a, the founder of Neno Evangelism, will be praying and fasting in his church. He will also charge between Sh500 and Sh2000 for special prayer rooms per night. Hallelujah money.
8. Jubilee MPs are threatening to dump Azimio over PSC positions. They have said that they are tired of conmanship and political banditry in Azimio. Led by Sabina Chege, Jubilee MPs earlier this week expressed their displeasure with ODM after the party missed out on the Parliamentary Service Commission slots.
9. A Kenyan family has asked the Kenyan and Italian government to help them find out what happened to their daughter. When the body of Amani Justine Luwali arrived in Kenya from Italy, it came with instructions from her in-laws for her family not to open the coffin, but to proceed with burial.
They opened the coffin and found that the body had several scars and stitches. So they requested a post-mortem examination to be conducted at Malindi Referral Hospital mortuary. It revealed the body was missing vital organs, including the heart, kidneys and liver, major blood vessels, eyeballs and the kneecap. The autopsy concluded that organ harvesting had taken place. The lady left Kenya in 2016, got married to an Italian man but after some time, she filed for a divorce. Luwali was 35 when she died.
10. Kenya Airways pilots went on strike for 4 days before resuming work after being hit by a barrage of threats. KQ now claims that it lost about Sh1.2 billion in the four days of pilots' strike. Next year, KQ will post a loss bigger than the size of Africa; wait for it.
11. Nakuru children who ate chameleons due to hunger on Tuesday received food, beddings from Susan Kihika. Molo mother Joyce Chemng'etich and her mother Received the gifts as Nakuru Governor Susan Kihika started fulfilling the promises she made to them.
12. Dr. Resila Atieno Onyango, the only female police officer to attain a doctorate degree (PhD) in the National Police Service's (NPS) history, has been tapped to replace Bruno Shioso as the official police spokesperson.
Dr. Resila, an Ivy League graduate, is a Senior Superintendent of Police (SSP) and before her recent appointment served as the Deputy Director of Planning at the Office of the Inspector General of Police. She earned her PhD and Master of Philosophy in Criminal Justice from the Graduate Center /John Jay College of Criminal Justice-The City University of New York (CUNY) in 2013. Until August 2021 she was a Criminal Intelligence Officer on contract at the International Criminal Police Organization (INTERPOL).
She has taught Criminal Justice both at John Jay College of Criminal Justice USA and locally at the USIU-Africa. She is also invited regularly in her capacity as a Criminal Justice Expert to speak at Drexel University, USA. Okay, this lady eats books for breakfast lunch and supper… how do you feel about your Masters…? (She is the happy cop in the photos.)
13. At least 1, 500 boda boda riders have been arrested by the police in the last week following a crackdown by the police on boda boda gangs.
14. The University of Nairobi Vice-Chancellor, Prof John Kiama, on Friday, criticized the grading system used by the Kenya National Examination Council (KNEC) over what he described as a deliberate move to fail candidates.
Speaking on Spice FM, Kiama argued that the grading system adopted by the examination council reduced the number of students transiting to universities hence ending the dreams of many hoping to further their studies. Kiama warned that the low number of students qualifying to join university was an alarming trajectory for the country with regard to efficiency in the education sector.
“Since about 2016 and 2017- KNEC decided to fail everyone in the country. Today the mode for the national exam is D-. What are we doing for children it is not possible," Kiama claimed.
15. A woman from Muruka village in Murang'a was arrested for allegedly poisoning her 4-year-old child (on 7th or 8th) so that she could be free to travel to Middle East after securing a house help job there.
Kandara sub-county Police Commander Michael Mwaura said the woman is suspected of feeding pesticide to her 4-year-old after the husband refused to take care of the child while she was away. The police report narrated that the woman bought yoghurt for the child and fed it to the 4-year-old, who died a few minutes after severe vomits.
16. Residents of Nairobi County are up in arms over the crime rate that has surged in the city in the past weeks. Daytime muggings, robberies and a spate of knife cases. And while the public cry, Nairobi Police Commander, James Mugera, refuted these reports. Speaking to Citizen TV, Mugera on Thursday claimed that the reports were meant to tarnish President William Ruto's new administration.
17. Miguna Miguna has not insulted anyone for the last 3 to 4 days i.e he has not posted anything on social media. Someone should check on the guy…
18. Winnie Odinga and Kennedy Kalonzo have both been nominated by ODM and Wiper Party for EALA seats. Not everyone is happy... Most people think they got the nominations because of their parents… they have told Kenyans that everyone has a parent, you should not bring for them. Kennedy Kalonzo defended himself, saying he had served at the regional assembly and was conversant with the task ahead. Winnie Odinga on the other hand launched a manifesto, part of which claims that she has travelled around East Africa and understands the issues of the region, she also said she wants to empower young people of Eat Africa.
19. There is a problem in Nyeri. Bei ya waru imepanda. A 17Kg bucket that sold for 900 bob last month currently sells for 1, 300 bob.
This is after traders at the main market in Nyeri town have increased potato prices by between Sh400 and Sh500 due to a persistent drought that has affected production, an increase of 200 percent. Because of this, a plate of fries goes for Sh150, with no accompaniment. Just out of curiosity, Nyeri people; a plate of fries used to be accompanied by what huko kwenyu? And how much was it…?
20. South African President Cyril Ramaophosa was in the country for a two-day State. At the end of his visit, it was announced that he had signed 4 trade deals with Kenya, including Kenya’s export of meat products to South Africa from next month, and the removal of visa requirement for Kenyans going to South Africa (for at least 90 days) – you will however, be required to show that you have some money in your account and that you have been invited to SA by someone etc.
21. Safaricom's net profit for the six months ended September fell by 10 percent to Sh33.5 billion on the impact of a cut on the mobile termination rate (MTR) and higher costs associated with the entry into Ethiopia. However, CEO Peter Ndegwa explained that the entry to Ethiopia was a success. They are at 740, 000 subscribers, and growing at 20, 000 subscribers per day. He also revealed that the company made Sh 98 million 30 days after entering Ethiopia. Someone call polis, Safaricom is about to take people’s lunch in Addis.
22. Nurse Elizabeth Lukresia Robai alias the dancing nurse, has become a viral sensation after a TikTok video of her dancing to cheer up a sick baby surfaced online. She has received a one-year ambassadorial deal plus a paid vacation in Zanzibar for four days courtesy of Expeditions Maasai Safaris. When asked if she is singu or not (because this is always a Climate Change level issue) Robai, answered; “I am very much single and open to a relationship.”
23. Lamu Port was commissioned in July 2021. Since that time, only 13 ships have docked at the port. This is equivalent to handling 1,821 twenty-foot container equivalent units (TEUs) and 213 tonnes of conventional cargo.
24. Nairobi has been ranked ahead of London in a global index that tracks price movements in the top five percent luxury residential properties across 45 cities in the world, raising the status of Kenya’s capital as a favourite investment destination in Africa. The Prime Global Cities Index by realtor Knight Frank, which listed Nairobi as the only African city listed among 45 global cities that recorded annual growth in the third quarter of 2022, shows that the city’s ranking has moved up seven places to 29 in the 12 months to September from 35 in the same period last year. London is ranked 31. Translation; Nairobi is expensive.
25. A man called Macdonald Wanjohi was presented at Makadara Law Court on Friday. He admitted to stealing a general-purpose machine gun mounting stand, and a Land Cruiser door belonging to the Kenya Defence Forces (KDF) at the heavily protected Embakasi Garrison in Nairobi.
On said night, KDF soldiers manning the garrison heard a commotion inside the compound at around 10pm and upon going to check, they met Wanjohi with the two items. Both items combined are valued at about Sh 56, 000.
26. Private universities want the government to determine the available funds to support students’ university education before selection and placement are done. They argue that the present process of placing students to the universities and colleges system has led to a funding crisis. According to them Universities Fund, having determined the available money to support government-sponsored learners, should advise the placement agency on the number of students to select and place.
27. There was an article in the Standard about why women use hip boosters and fake ass… According to the piece, they do it for 5 reasons; fake ass boosts confidence, they do it because of societal pressure (because men like women with voluptuous bodies – hate that word; voluptuous), apparently, they are trendy and celebrities use them, full features attract more attention, and lastly fake asses are cheaper than surgery, pills and injections.
28. The opening of the Nairobi Expressway has seen land prices along the Mombasa Road commuter belt and its satellite towns grow in the past six years, unlocking value for investors in Syokimau, Kitengela and Athi River. According to HassConsult’s third quarter report, house prices in Nairobi and its environs jumped by 10.3 percent in the year to September. In case you are wondering, the HassConsult report shows that the asking price of an acre of land in Syokimau rose by 20.1 percent from last year to Sh27.7 million on average, with some quoting up to Sh31.6 million, Mlolongo is Sh33.2 million
29. An MCA will earn close to Sh400,000 besides being awarded a development budget if proposals by the new County Assemblies Forum (CAF) are adopted. Members of County Assemblies (MCAs) currently pocket a monthly salary of Sh144,376 and the proposal will almost triple their pay. By the way, Kenya has 2, 100 MCAs.
30. Kenyan quartet girls, the Moipei's, won the prestigious Julie Wilson award in the United States of America. Mugiithi singer Samidoh lost his YouTube channel to hackers. The channel has over 300k subscribers. The musician is currently in the US for a two-month music tour. Some women, who are not his wife (ves), have also been fighting over him. Socialite Amber Ray has announced her engagement to boyfriend Kennedy Rapudo. Amber shared the news with fans on Thursday by posting the proposal video on her Instagram account. The video, whose accompanying soundtrack is Ed Sheeran and Beyonce's 'Perfect Duet' song, ends with Rapudo on his knees, executing the proposal. Eric Omondi’s girlfriend Lynn finally broken her silence on the miscarriage she suffered while carrying his baby. The comedian was the first one to share the heartbreaking news via his Instagram, terming it as his biggest loss and longest night of their life. Comedian Crazy Kennar returned to the country from the US where he was part of Meta Digital Content creators summit. Singer Bahati has a new song out. Rapper Nonini received an award in US for raising albinism awareness.
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