09/10/2025
“ပွင့်လန်းလာသော အနှိမ်ခံပန်းတပွင့်”
A Blooming Suppressed Flower (English Version)
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A fully dressed police officer in his thirties stood up and stuck his p***s out in front of Gam. Gam was forced to sit on a chair and perform a sexual act. Gam felt unable to respond and was overwhelmed by fear, shame, sadness, anger, and humiliation.
“It was impossible for me to believe that something like this could happen to me at that moment,” Gam said. “The only thing on my mind was that I had an arrest warrant and needed to get through the checkpoint as quickly as possible. In the end, even when he tried to r**e me, I felt I had no choice but to let it happen. I will always remember this trauma in my life; the moment when I had no chance to fight back.” But Gam was lucky.
While he was being forced to perform this sexual act, another police officer, around fifty years old, arrived and slapped the policeman in the nape of his neck. He then kicked the policeman out of the dorm and asked Gam for tea money for the policemen before releasing him. Gam didn’t even know how many banknotes he had taken from his bag.
It was only because of that police officer that “Gam” escaped from the hellish cell. This incident happened on February 17, 2022, at the Thanlwin Bridge checkpoint in Hpa-an, Kayin State. However, this was not the only time that Gam was subjected to such abuse.
“Gam” is an LGBT born in Mawlamyine, Mon State. Life as an LGBT person from a young age has not been easy for “Gam”.
Gam was the only son in his family. Therefore, Gam's mother had high hopes for her only son, wanting him to get married and have children. Therefore, Gam had to suppress his wishes and live in a state of despair, looking at his mother's face.
“When I first found out I had a boyfriend, my mother kicked me in the face. I would say it was domestic violence. But it was out of shame and anger. And then I was beaten with an iron rod until it broke,” Gam recalls childhood as an LGBT person.
Now, “Gam” says that his mother has come to accept his existence because of his efforts and circumstances.
“Gam” studied at a military school from a young age and, like other LGBT people, was bullied by fellow students.
“When soldiers’ children see LGBT people, they think they are a laughing stock. In the neighborhood, there was a popular LGBT community selling citrus flakes (shout-thee-say-pyarr), and they had a culture of their own, so when they saw us, they would clap their hands and ask us to dance, and they would surround us and physically touch us and do things that were deeply uncomfortable," “Gam” said, recounting experiences as a student as a child.
Despite being bullied since childhood, “Gam” was not one to give up. After graduating from high school, he moved to Myitkyina, Kachin State in 2003, where he devoted himself to his passion as a fashion designer. After taking a design course, he began to gain popularity among the people of Myitkyina and won competitions before moving to Yangon. “I started as a designer in Myitkyina,” he says with a smile.
“I am very interested in competitions. Since 2007, I won first prize in the Miss People Style Competition 2007, the largest competition in Myanmar. Since Myitkyina, I have won prizes in competitions at Manaw Stadium.”
As the designer’s career progressed,Gam’s achievements continued to grow. In 2016, Gam designed the Myanmar Puppet Art Costume, which was worn by model and actress Htet Htet Htun. With that dress, Htet Htet Htun was crowned Miss Universe Myanmar, and the Best National Costume Award was won by the designer La Zaing Gham Hwee, who represented Myanmar.
“The designer award I won with Htet Htun is a “Masterpiece” in my life. It has left a mark on Myanmar and earned me a place in the world of art as the first.”
“Success is not something that awaits you. You have to work hard. When I was abroad, I had to set tables, distribute handouts, and do various jobs, but in the end, I was hungry for fashion and design, so no matter where I went, I always went back to that path,” he said, explaining how he tried to achieve this vision.
Gam, who was enjoying such success, when the military took power in 2021, instead of success, he resisted the military dictatorship and faced difficulties. Gam's life began to fall apart.
“Since the time I started expressing my wishes, I led the designer team in deciding what to wear each day so that I wouldn’t fall behind in fashion. I also took part as a strike leader on Kyuntaw Road and Central Road in my neighborhood, Sanchaung, for four months before I managed to escape. Day and night, I expressed my wishes for freedom.”
The warrant was issued on the 15th of April 2022, they arrested me on the 16th, and the military sealed my house on the 17th.”
“Gam” had already reached Hpa-an before the military forces arrived. Leaving Yangon had not been easy for him. Around 1:00 p.m., the car carrying Gam arrived at the Thanlwin Bridge checkpoint in Hpa-an. When the soldiers guarding the checkpoint searched his phone, they discovered deleted photos showing Gam participating in protests.
“Come here, strike leader,” they said, forcing him to stand under the sun for over an hour. Later, a police officer took him to a dormitory in the western part of the town and attempted to sexually assault him. However, thanks to the intervention of another police officer, Gam managed to escape.
“I want people to know that there are individuals like us — LGBT people — in all walks of life. I am certain that the police officer on duty there had previous experiences with LGBT individuals. He seemed to decide that if he discovered I was LGBT, he would have a victim to exploit and abuse, and that’s exactly what he tried to do to me.”
Although he managed to escape the sexual assault at the checkpoint, Gam, as an LGBT person, could not escape such forms of abuse entirely. Because of an arrest warrant, he was forced to abandon his successful career and flee Myanmar. On February 18, 2022, at around 4 a.m., Gam crossed the Thaung Yin (Moei) River and sought refuge in Mae Sot, Thailand.
“I had to make a very difficult decision to leave the country. But I kept living a normal life, thinking that if there were more people like me, then Min Aung Hlaing would be happy. There were people who would help me carry the burden, but they didn’t. Compared to the comrades who sacrificed their lives, families, and body parts in the forest during this revolution, our lives are much better. I feel very sorry for those who are experiencing a more painful and bitter life than me,” he said, leaving behind his successes and starting a new life in another country, but he has no regrets.
Shortly after arriving in Thailand, “Gam” and his friend (who was dressed as a woman) were arrested by Thai police while riding a motorbike. When the Thai police realized that they were LGBT, they groped and sexually assaulted “Gam” and made fun of them in a language they only understood.
“Thailand is a country that is recognized worldwide as an open and welcoming country for LGBT people. Since it was not our own country, but a foreign country, we had no right to resist and we were subjected to what they did,” Gam recounted his experiences in Thailand.
Currently, “Gam” lives in Mae Sot, on the Thai-Burma border, and goes to some camps in the jungle to teach military uniform sewing classes and provide basic sewing classes for reconstruction in some liberated areas. As an LGBT person, he continues to participate in various activities for the revolution.
“I am an LGBT person, but I am not the kinda one to be too respectful. The main thing is to be humane. If I am happy, I am happy. If I have to cry, I cry. If I have to be angry, I leave. If I love, I love. That is how I value the life I am living. As long as my happiness does not harm others, I believe that I am right, so I live it lightly,” he said, explaining his approach to being LGBT.
“Gam” has faced various forms of oppression and discrimination throughout her life, but he has been trying to realize her beautiful dream of a future by participating in the military dictatorship revolution because she wanted to improve the lives of other young people.
“During this revolution, many young people lost their future, so when the revolution is over, when they are young, I want to support them so that they can become not just ordinary tailors but also designers and design professionals as a profession,” he said, describing his dream of a future after the revolution.
ဆောင်းပါး - နွေဦး
Article - Nway Oo
Translated by Thara
#ပွင့်လန်းလာသော_အနှိမ်ခံပန်းတပွင့်
