DharmaSharing

DharmaSharing Share Dharma and come for healing with Guan Yin & Medicine Buddha.

27/07/2026

Yesterday, I attended the Dhamma Vijaya-Sati Vihara Vassa Retreat event, invitation by Founder and Abbot, Bhante Dr. A. Siri Yasassi, marking the commencement of the three-month Rain Retreat (Vassa).

Bhante shared a Dhamma reflection, followed by the chanting of the Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta, reminding all of us of the Buddha's first teaching: that dukkha (suffering) is an inherent part of life; the cause of suffering is craving (taṇhā); the cessation of suffering is possible through the abandonment of craving; and the path leading to the cessation of suffering is the Noble Eightfold Path.

We take this opportunity to wish everyone good health, peace, and happiness always.

Sādhu! Sādhu! Sādhu! 🙏 🪷 🙏

13/06/2026

Happy birthday to my Teacher, Venerable Bhante Ayagama Siri Yasassi Thero, Chief Abbot of Dharma-Vijaya Sati Vihara, Ara Damansara. May the Triple Gem and the Devas bless you with good health, happiness and peace of mind. May you continue to guide and enlighten us. Sadhu Sadhu Sadhu 🪷 🪷 🙏 💕🪷 🙏 🪷 🙏

Dhamma Sharing: How to protect yourself from gossippers, backstabbers and betrayals?Betrayal by close friends cuts deep...
31/05/2026

Dhamma Sharing: How to protect yourself from gossippers, backstabbers and betrayals?

Betrayal by close friends cuts deeply because it violates trust, and repeated backbiting and gossiping create a toxic environment that can make you doubt your own judgment. You deserve relationships that feel safe.

Let me be honest: "You cannot control other people's behavior. You cannot make them stop gossiping or betraying you. What you can control is how you respond, how you protect your mind, and whether you keep giving them access to you."

With that said, here are practical and Buddhist-informed remedies—some aimed at changing the dynamic, others aimed at protecting your peace regardless of what they do.

1. First, distinguish between influence and control

· Things you can influence: Setting boundaries, changing how you react, limiting what information you share, calmly naming the behavior.

· Things you cannot control: What they say when you're not there, whether they feel guilt, whether they change.

Focus your energy on the first list.

2. Practical remedies to stop (or reduce) the toxic behavior

These work best if you are willing to lose the friendship—because real change often requires that willingness.

A. Direct, calm confrontation (once only)
Pull aside the person you trust most in the group. Say:
"When you said [specific thing] about me to [person], it hurt because I considered you close. If there's an issue, please tell me directly. If this continues, I'll need to step back from this friendship."

· Don't accuse wildly. Be specific about one incident.

· Toxic people often deny or deflect. That's your answer: they won't change.

B. Starve the gossip machine.

Gossips need fresh material. Stop sharing personal struggles, wins, or opinions with anyone in that circle. Give neutral, boring answers: "Things are fine, thanks." Without fuel, the fire dies.

C. Change the subject or leave the room.

If someone gossips to you about another friend, say: "I don't feel comfortable talking about them when they're not here." Then change the subject. This signals you're no longer a safe audience.

D. Distance as a remedy.

Sometimes the only way to make behavior stop affecting you is to physically and emotionally withdraw from that friend group. Not out of revenge—out of self-respect. You don't need to announce it. Just become gradually less available.

3. Buddhist remedies for your own mind (since you asked about mind-purification earlier).

Even if they never stop talking, you can become unshaken by it. That's real protection.

A. See gossip for what it is
The Buddha called idle chatter and divisive speech one of the four wrong forms of speech. But here's the liberating part: gossip about you is just sound + your reaction. Without your wounded identity grabbing onto it, it has no power.

Practice: When you hear they've spoken behind your back, say to yourself:
"Words have been spoken. That is all. No wound exists except the one I add."

B. Loving-kindness (mettā) for the difficult ones.

This sounds counterintuitive, but it works. Sit quietly and repeat:
"May you be free from the anger that makes you gossip. May you find better ways to connect. May you be at peace."

Why do this? Not for them—for you. Hatred ties you to them. Loving-kindness cuts the rope.

C. The "second arrow" teaching.

The first arrow is their betrayal (painful, real). The second arrow is your rumination, your story of victimhood, your sleepless nights. You can't stop the first arrow always, but you can refuse to shoot the second.

D. Examine your own expectations.

In Buddhism, dukkha (suffering) arises from craving—including craving for friends to be loyal in the way you imagine. That doesn't excuse them, but it frees you. When you stop expecting undying loyalty from flawed humans, their betrayal stings less.

4. When to walk away completely.

If after trying the above:

· You feel anxious before seeing them
· You've directly spoken once and nothing changed
· The pattern has repeated multiple times with no remorse

Then the remedy is compassionate distance. Not hatred. Not revenge. Simply: "I wish you well, but I cannot be near you."

The Buddha himself left his family and palace not out of anger, but because the environment was not conducive to his peace.

A final thought

You asked how to make them stop. The honest answer: you may not be able to. But you can reach a point where it no longer destroys your peace—and that is VICTORY.

30/05/2026

Presenting my FULL song "Sumana Wesak"! 🪷 🎶 It's a special beautiful Wesak song reflecting my bubbly spirit and devotion to the Triple Gem. 🙏 I can be serious or playful, but I promise to behave this Wesak! 😉 My Buddhist name, Sumanaratana Yip, was given to me by Venerable Bhante Dr. A. Sri Yasassi during my Monk Novitiate Program. Sumanaratana means Joyful Gem. As tomorrow is Wesak eve, I release the song now to wish all my brothers and sisters in the Dhamma "A happy blessed Wesak....the Sumana way!" 😂 🪷 🙏
If you love the song, please help Like & Share ya. 🙏

Question to DeepSeek:In Buddhism, we believe in karma. Some of the consequences can be felt in this very life itself or ...
22/05/2026

Question to DeepSeek:
In Buddhism, we believe in karma. Some of the consequences can be felt in this very life itself or next life. Recently, a student was caught in a freak accident. His head was decapitated as a result of the accident caused by a reckless driver. Is it karma comes into play? I feel truly sorry for the boy and sympathetic to his family. Often times, whenever something bad happened, we would immediately said it's karma because of our past action. The boy and his family is Buddhist. In the Buddhist context, what say you?

Answer from DeepSeek:
This is a deeply painful situation, and your compassion for the boy and his family is understandable. In Buddhism, however, we must be very careful not to assume that a specific tragic event is a direct “punishment” for a specific past action. The Buddha explicitly discouraged laypeople from trying to trace precise one-to-one causes of karmic results (vipāka), because only a fully enlightened being can see the intricate web of karma across lifetimes.

That said, the general principle is that killing or causing severe harm in a past life can potentially ripen as a life cut short by violence or accident in this life. For example, if someone in a past life deliberately beheaded a living being, one possible karmic result could be losing one’s own head in a future life, under conditions where no one intended it as retribution—just the impersonal fruition of a past action. The Lonaphala Sutta (Salt Crystal Sutta) also teaches that a small bad action can produce a huge result when combined with other unwholesome mental habits or lack of counteracting good karma.

However, there are four key points to remember:

1. We cannot know – Claiming “this child died because he killed in a past life” is a form of wrong view if stated as certainty. The Buddha said such speculative inference is impossible for ordinary beings.
2. Multiple causes – The reckless driver’s actions in this life are also a direct cause. The driver’s own karma (negligence, recklessness) is far more immediately relevant than the child’s past karma.
3. No victim-blaming – In Buddhist ethics, expressing sympathy for the family is primary, not analyzing the child’s past deeds. Doing so can harm faith and increase suffering.
4. The family’s practice – If they are devout Buddhists, they may take comfort in practices like dedicating merit to the boy for a favorable rebirth, rather than dwelling on what “he did wrong.”

If pressed for a doctrinal answer: The kind of action that could produce decapitation as a result would likely be a severe act of intentional killing (particularly beheading) in a past life, combined with the absence of powerful counteracting karma (e.g., great generosity, meditation, or virtue). But again, this is a hypothetical principle, not a diagnosis of that boy’s situation.

In practice, the most compassionate response is to grieve with the family, support them, and focus on the driver’s responsibility and the preciousness of this life—not on speculating about the boy’s past.

Amidst the political drama — the racial slurs, the condemnations, the anger and swearing — humanity emerged from a tragi...
21/05/2026

Amidst the political drama — the racial slurs, the condemnations, the anger and swearing — humanity emerged from a tragic freak accident.

A Chinese Malaysian father lost his 18-year-old son in the most heartbreaking way. In a freak accident, the boy’s head fell onto his father’s leg. No parent should ever have to bear such a moment.

But in the days that followed, humanity prevailed.

People of all races surrounded the father with tears, hugs, and silent prayers. Social media, often a battlefield, became a garden of condolences — Malay, Chinese, Indian, and others, all speaking the same language of sorrow and love.

For one moment, we were color blind. We didn’t fight over politics. We didn’t ask about race or religion. We just grieved together. We became one true Malaysian family.

And in the midst of this pain, many noticed something remarkable: the father’s calmness. In interviews, he spoke with a composure that felt almost supernatural.

And that is the Buddha’s teaching, alive in a broken heart.

Ananda who cried after knowing the Buddha was dying, was told by the Buddha not to cry.
The Buddha’s last words to Ananda were: "Impermanent indeed are all conditioned things. Their nature is to arise and pass. Having arisen, they cease; their stilling — Nibbana — is true bliss."

And Kisa Gotami, the mother who lost her child and went mad with grief, was gently awakened by the Buddha: nothing in this life is permanent — not joy, not sorrow, not even the ones we hold most dear.

This father… he is like a lotus flower. Rooted in deep, dark mud, yet untouched by it. The storm could not shake him. The loss could not harden him.

Yet, he is still a human with emotion. He did cry next to the coffin of his son. I could deeply understand his feelings because I, too was at the bedside of my Mum as she took her last breath.

But nevertheless, the Father did stay calm during interviews, something that I may not be able to do so if I were to be him.

May he continue to walk the Dhamma path — strong, calm, and patient. May his beloved son find the bliss of Nibbana and be welcomed into Amitabha’s Pure Land of light and peace.

Namo Amitofu. 🙏

Rest in peace, dear boy. And to his father, condolences to you and your grief reminds us what it means to be human — and Malaysian.

Namo Amitofu 🙏 🪷 🙏 🪷 🙏 🪷

Address

Puchong

Website

Alerts

Be the first to know and let us send you an email when DharmaSharing posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.

Shortcuts

Share

Category