30/10/2025
It is a Crime to be a Girl
Just like Ochanya’s story, countless girls have been defiled by the very men who vowed to protect them. Uncles, fathers, stepfathers, pastors, neighbours, husbands, lecturers and all other titles they bear. And sometimes, mothers and aunties would turn a blind eye, choosing what they term “peace” over “justice”.
This is not new.
This is Nigeria — a place where a woman’s silence is called “wisdom” and “strength” and her pain is called exaggeration.
A lot of people in this nation were raised in homes where “protect your marriage at all cost” is a commandment higher than “thou shalt not kill.”
And so, an auntie watched her niece suffer — r***d by her own husband and son — and said nothing?
Because society taught her that saving her marriage is more important than saving a child.
If this isn’t madness dressed in culture, then what is?
Every day, we teach our girls to shrink — to smile through trauma, to forgive the unforgivable, and to die quietly so the family name can live loudly.
We ask them to protect the image of monsters while bleeding inside.
And when they finally speak, we call them bitter. We call them broken.
But we forget — they were broken by the silence we glorified.
I often ask: Who is this “society” that silences women?
It’s every person who says, “Don’t talk about it.”
It’s every friend who whispers, “Let it go, you’ll heal.”
It’s every pastor who says, “Pray about it.”
It’s every mother who says, “Don’t disgrace us.”
It’s every commentor who says, “Don’t disgrace us.”
And so evil multiplies ; unchallenged, uninterrupted, undisturbed.
Tell me, how long will we keep burying our daughters alive?How long will we call oppression “tradition” and cowardice “patience”?
How long will we blame a child for being born female?
In this country, to be born with a hole is to be born into war. You become a battlefield of other people’s lusts, opinions, and control.
Everyone wants to own your body, silence your voice, and rewrite your story.
But today, let it be known —
The girls are not quiet anymore.
We are done apologizing for surviving. We are done calling predators “husband”, “father”, “uncle”, “friend”, or “family!”
We are done protecting rapists in the name of respect!.
Ochanya deserved better.
Orah deserved better.
Every nameless, silenced girl deserved better.
If this society will not protect its daughters, then we, the daughters, will protect each other. Because the time for silence has expired. The time for justice has come.
Let it burn where it must.
Let it break what it must.
But let truth finally breathe.
Chioma Rosemary Onyekaba, B.A. Hons, MPD
Publisher / Author / Multibrand CEO /
Entrepreneur / IATA Best Performing Student in Nigeria 2025 / The Future Awards Africa 2025 Nominee / Realtor Web/Graphic Designer / Brand Strategist
