04/06/2025
Single ladies, before you say yes please read this.
š“How to Know If a Man Has Drive or Will Be Deadweight ......15 Signs to Watch For
1. He is content doing the bare minimum.
He shows up at work, does the least, comes home, and melts into the couch or bed. No hunger to grow, no interest in stretching himself. If a man is okay with routine survival, he won't suddenly become a visionary just because you married him.
2. He always says "one day," but that day never comes.
He has 10 ideas, 5 business plans, and 3 passions... but zero ex*****on. You've been hearing the same dream for years, and he hasn't moved a finger. Potential without discipline is just noise.
3. He shuts down when life gets hard.
Small pressure, and he ghosts everyone. Job loss? He checks out for months. He doesnāt pivot, he pauses. And if he's emotionally immature, guess who ends up cleaning up the storm? You.
4. He can't handle correction, even when it's gentle.
If everything sounds like an insult to him, he's not ready for growth. A man who refuses feedback will drag you into his cycle, where you're either silent or walking on eggshells. Thatās not peace, itās control.
5. You're the only one thinking about the future.
He doesn't ask about savings, health, family goals, or housing plans. Meanwhile, you're mentally raising a child, budgeting for both of you, and setting alarms for bills he forgets. Thatās not partnership... thatās parenting.
6. His life lacks structure, and he likes it that way.
He wakes up whenever, scrolls all day, and lives reactively. No daily readings, no consistent habits, no long-term goals. Men like this will frustrate you with inconsistency... then accuse you of being too serious.
7. He speaks like a king, but walks like a pawn.
Everything is bigābig plans, big money, big futureābut he wonāt show up early, read a book, or finish one task before jumping to the next. Real ambition is quiet and disciplined, not loud and scattered.
8. Youāre already carrying most of the weight.
He leans on you for emotional support, financial help, decision-making... even motivation to get out of bed. If you're doing all the work before marriage, donāt expect the ring to change anything.
9. He feels intimidated by your ambition.
Instead of celebrating your drive, he competes with it... or quietly resents it. He may not say it outright, but you'll feel it in how he downplays your wins or withdraws when you shine. Thatās not love, thatās a stress response.
10. His circle is full of stagnant men.
If his closest friends donāt challenge him, inspire him, or hold him accountable, donāt expect him to be different. A man is rarely more serious than the company he keeps.
11. He doesnāt plan for crisis, just vibes.
Ask him what he'd do if he lost his job or faced a health scare, and heāll say, āGod will provide.ā Faith is beautiful, but faith without wisdom is dangerous. You need someone who has a plan... not just prayers.
12. He is jealous of people doing better than him.
He sees a successful man and says, āHeās a fraudā or āItās just connection.ā He doesnāt ask, āWhat can I learn?ā He asks, āWhy him?ā
13. He is passive about your growth.
He doesnāt push you to grow, doesnāt ask about your dreams, doesnāt celebrate your wins, and doesnāt make room for your ambition. A partner who doesnāt sharpen you will eventually dull you.
14. He glorifies struggle in the name of love.
To him, your loyalty is measured by how much lack you can endure beside him. He wants to "build with you"... but has no blueprint. If all he brings is a dream and suffering, what exactly are you building?
15. Youāre exhausted, but still trying to convince yourself itās love.
Deep down, your spirit is already tired. Youāre parenting a grown man while calling it partnership. Love should feel like peace... not like youāre always one crisis away from collapse.
Written by
Ifedayo Agoro Itom (Dang)
