05/06/2026
Shortly after we got married, we had our first serious disagreement. We were staying in a hotel, and food was brought to our room. In my mind, I decided I was not going to eat. I was doing “shakara,” thinking that if I refused to eat, my husband would also refuse to eat.
To my surprise, he sat down and enjoyed his meal. He even ate my own on top. 😂
I was shocked.
We had just quarreled, yet he was eating comfortably.
Seeing my confusion, he said something I have never forgotten:
“The fact that we have a disagreement does not mean we should stop living our normal lives. Should I die because we had an argument?” 😀
That lesson stayed with me.
Many people allow temporary disagreements to change the value of permanent relationships.
The moment they have a little quarrel:
They stop wearing their wedding ring.
They change their spouse’s name on their phone from “My Love” to “Madam,” “Oga,” or simply their first name, “Emeka.”
They begin to expose private matters. They start discussing marital issues with friends, family, or even on social media.
They stop providing financially or become unnecessarily stingy to “teach the other person a lesson.”
They start keeping malice and switch to no greetings, no smiles, no hugs, and no kindness.
They start sleeping in different rooms. Instead of addressing the issue, they create physical distance.
They stop praying together.
They are always threatening divorce.
But maturity teaches us that disagreement is not the same as disconnection.
You can be upset and still be committed.
You can be offended and still be respectful.
You can have unresolved issues and still honor your relationship.
A disagreement should not make you forget the value of the person you love.
Healthy relationships are not built by people who never disagree. They are built by people who refuse to let disagreements destroy what they have built together.
Never allow a temporary conflict to make you permanently dishonor a valuable relationship.
~ Be Refreshed 🔥
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