28/07/2024
I'm getting a Divorce...
I was blinded by love.
I could sense his behavior change. He lays on the couch instead of the bed, He makes uncountable excuses just to stay away from home, I sense the lies when I try to confront him, but he denied it.
He made me believe Iâm the only love of his life.
I know he had a past but I shouldnât judge him with his past, right?
He made me believe Iâm the only woman he truly loved.
Why will I doubt him? I came from a family where a âyea' is a âyea', and where a â Nay' is a âNay'.
My father, a man who loves God, and his family, was willing to sacrifice everything on the altar of love.
He taught us the need for honesty in everything we do.
My mum has always trained us with so much love.
Not until I left home for some work did I meet David, my husband.
He saw me coming back from work very late at night and in the rain, offered a drop.
I rejected the drop because of how I was rraised but insisted and later took my digits. On getting home that night, He called to make sure, I reached home safely. It was so nice of him.
Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, we still communicate, and finally, He decided to come and see my people and make me his wife.
He was welcomed warmly after his intention was made.
Father: You look mature, how old are you?
David: Iâm 38, sir.
Father: And you havenât been married before?
David: I was waiting for the woman I truly love, and it happened to be your daughter.
Father: If you both love each other, I give you my blessings.
David: Thank you, Sir. I promise I will forever love her and take care of her.
I have been married for 2 years and have a child with my husband.
We have had our ups and downs, like most couples.
When we first got together, he told me he didnât have kids.
I would have been fine with it if he did, it wouldnât have changed how I felt about him, but he was very clear about not having them.
Well, guess what? I came to find out the hard way.
I had travelled with my child to see my parents because they were sick.
We agreed that I will stay for 2weeks and booked my going and coming back flight.
But then, I stayed for one week but had to return home because of an emergency I have in my hospital. I am a medical doctor who specializes in women and children.
I returned home unannounced and I met the very shock of my life.
I met this girl of 7 years playing in my compound, and when I asked her how she got access into the compound, she answered, â Mummy brought meâ.
I asked where her mum was, and she replied, â Inside with Daddyâ.
My spirit left me. I rushed inside and saw both of them na*ked on my matrimonial bed.
He had told me about the lady and the child.
But he said, â Baby, this is Anita, my brother's ex. He had an affair with her and got her pregnant.
He asked her to go stay with her mum in the village, but she insisted on staying in the city. My brother got annoyed and left her, got another, and married her.
Anita is married now but doesnât have a child for her current husband, they begged my brother and adopted the childâ.
I felt pity for Anita. She is married, but not until today.
I found out He was my husbandâs ex-lover.
I don't understand! I am livid!
Right now , he is humiliated and begging for forgiveness.
He said he didn't think I'd want to be with him if I knew he had a child (even though that's not true), he says that "in a sense" he doesn't have a kid because Anitaâs husband adopted her.
That's ridiculous.
How could he hide something like this from me for so long?
To make the matter worst, he slept with the same â married' woman on my matrimonial bed.
What else is he hiding?
I love this man so much, He was my first love, my first kiss, He deflowered me. I trusted him blindly, I loved him sheepishly, but I was given a bitter juice instead .
This is so wrong and I don't know if I can handle it. I am thinking about ending our marriage, which makes me sad for my child.
Am I taking the wrong actions?
#
Telling your spouse the truth about your past in marriage isnât always easy, but it is the right thing to do.
A marriage built on lies and deception wonât stand when the truth starts to unfold.
Lies cause more damage than truth told.
You can save your marriage from shattering by being truthful when asked about your past.
Who is meant for you will stay even after knowing the truth.
©Ngozi Endurance Akachukwu.