20/09/2025
From my box . Nawa oooo
Good day, Mrs Mel. Good day, fellow home builders.
I hardly know how to begin this. To even put it into words feels like tearing open a woundd that has not stopped bleedingg . I am embarrassedd, ashamed, and wounded all at once. Were it not for the shield of anonymity, I could never summon the courage to speak of this.
I have been in a relationship with a young woman for two years now. I have loved her deeply, honoured her, and in my own way, cherished her. But truth be told, she has never truly respected me. She is rudeee, quick-temperedd and oftentimes dismissive. And yet, after each outburst, she returns in tears, pleading that she is a good person, that she doesn’t know what comes over her. Somehow, I believed her. Somehow, her tears have bound me to her, and I remained.
If you know me well, you know I am not a careless man. I care for those I love. I provide, I give. Even now, the latest iPhone 17 she flaunts was a gift from me. I have never raised my voice at her, never spoken harshly. I have treated her as a queen in every sense of the word.
Yesterday was her birthday. I had planned something grand something beautiful. She knew nothing of it. I invited a few of my closest friends. Through one of them, I also gathered her friends, who came in large numbers. It was meant to be a day of joy, a memory to last a lifetime.
And then, in front of everyone, I knelt down. I held out the ring and asked the question that had lived in my heart for months Will you marry me?
She looked me in the eye and said, No.
The room spun. My ears rang. I thought perhaps she was joking, perhaps it was nerves. But then she pulled me aside, and in that private corner, she slappeddd me. She told me not to pressurise her, that she was not ready to be tied down. She said she is 28, she is not done living, and that marriage is not in her plans not yet.
In that moment, my world collapseddd. I felt stripped, humiliated, less than a mman. I drove home with my heart burninggg my head pounding. I kept asking myself, what did I do to deserve this?
Later that night, in my foolishnessss, I began messaging her, begging that perhaps we could talk privately. I tried to excuse her actions as tension, as nerves, as the pressureee of the moment. But my friends have told me sternly, Never go back to her. A woman who can shame you publicly, humiliate you before the world, does not love you. Let her go.
And yet, here I am. My heart refuses to listen. I love her still, in a way that I cannot explain. She is the woman I love, even though she has broken me.
I am torn between my head and my heart. And so I bring my painn here, not for mockery, but for counsel. What do I do when love feels like bo***ge, yet letting go feels like deathhhhh?
Copied: Racheal Joseph
