28/07/2025
Why did you announce your pregnancy online?
That new job, that house you just started building, that promotion, that small business opportunity, that new relationship that hasn’t even survived one fight—
Why do you announce it when it’s not yet ripe?
You just woke up one morning, no warning, no signal—
Boom! “Hey guys, we’re expecting! 🥹”
Madam, who summoned you? Who sent you?
You just enrolled yourself into village people premium monitoring plan with zero data charges.
People who didn’t even know you were dating are now monitoring your womb like CCTV on night mode.
Aunty Stella from that WhatsApp group where nobody talks unless there's drama will now start dry fasting—but not for you o, for your downfall.
You’ll now start seeing comments like:
“Awwwn, congratulations dear, may God see you through 😢”
—from the same girl who snatched your man in 2016 and still blocked you on IG.
Even the evil spirits you dodged through midnight prayer and holy water will now say,
"Ah ah, so she’s still alive? Let’s test her spiritual immune system.”
Next thing, you carry your testimony like Ghana-Must-Go and post:
"Finally got the job of my dreams!"
Two days later, HR emails you like:
“Sorry, we meant to send that letter to someone else. Best wishes!”
You’ll now be in your room, with one eye open, asking God:
"But I gave you the glory na 😭... was it not loud enough?"
Then you build house and post:
"To God be the glory, I just finished my mansion!"
Only for one lizard to enter the ceiling with his full family.
Now you’re sleeping outside, under mosquito choir.
Even the guy printing your wedding invitation is angry you’re rejoicing.
He’s like: “Who told her this marriage will reach the altar?”
See ehn, this online announcement ministry is not for the fainthearted.
Social media is not your village meeting.
Keep your testimony till it’s fully cooked, garnished, and served with chilled Coke and peppered snail.
Because not every eye that sees your post is innocent.
Some eyes are wired with ancestral Wi-Fi.
They don’t scroll, they scan and sabotage.
So please, next time you feel like announcing your good news online,
Enter your bathroom quietly, stand in front of the mirror, and whisper it to your reflection.
If your reflection claps for you, post it.
But if your reflection slaps you across the face—log out, delete the app, and go and drink water.
It is ,We listen and read ,we don't Judge,we HEAL.....
(Part 3)
✍️ Shalom The Healing Teacher
