29/04/2025
MY SPOUSE SPIRITUAL LIFE WAS AFFECTED BY THIS || THE WINLOS
When myself and my wife got married, I was the spiritual one—she wasn’t there yet. You know, for those of us in Pentecostal circles, our prayer life is by force. When we want to pray, it’s war! Hallelujah! We hold the poles, the whole place is shaking; if we have not done that, we feel we have not prayed. I’m telling you, we are warriors. But I married my wife, and when she talks to Jesus, it’s, “Oh, Holy Spirit, we love you, we adore your name. How are the angels doing? Thank you, Jesus,” and she’s done. I was like, “What’s the meaning of this? You have not prayed.” Hallelujah! When I wake up to pray at night, my wife would say, “Sweet, you’re disturbing the house. Why are you shouting? You and God don’t have quarrel.” I’d say, “Sweet, that’s how we pray.” I thought my wife wasn’t spiritual, and that became a problem for us.
Many of us will meet people with different spiritual dynamics, and we may conclude they aren’t spiritual enough because their attitude toward prayer or their approach to Christianity doesn’t align with our expectations. Listen, there’s the “A” of Christianity and the “C” of Christianity. Many of us want to marry the “A” because the person speaks in Christianese: Thou art holy, woman of God. We say, This one is spiritual! But Christianity is deeper than that. It’s about fruits, not the appearance or gifts. Amen. If you don’t understand this, you will make a mistake and won’t be patient enough to grow the one God has for you. Don’t go proposing to someone and asking, How many hours have you prayed? Have you had encounters? What kind of encounter? I’m not saying we shouldn’t be spiritual, but some of the things we’re looking for aren’t what keep a home.
We live in a generation where people pretend; the appearance of Christianity is everywhere today. You must discern beyond the physicality of Christianity that you see. People grow, and they don’t all grow at the same pace—and that’s okay! Don’t rush someone because of your imagination of who they should be. For example, I met someone recently after the first service in the green room, and he said, “Wow, only because it was my former church. I told you I was from House on the Rock; my husband carried me away.” At the time, when we were workers in House on the Rock, I wasn’t like this. Now I’ve grown, and he was surprised to see me. Growth is gradual; it won’t always be the same. As long as someone is teachable, you’ll see progress. That’s a fruit you must look out for: Is the person teachable? Are they open to growing? Growth itself is attractive.
Some people may be loud in prayers but lacking in values. These are things you must observe carefully. My husband once said there’s the “A/C of Christianity”— how does a person behave? Look at their fruits. Even if the person is gifted in speaking in tongues, the fruits matter most. Don’t compare people and say, “Look at that sister; she carries fire. You need to be like her.” Hallelujah! Everyone’s journey is different. For instance, my wife wouldn’t fast, wouldn’t do spiritual exercises, and wouldn’t do anything beyond flipping her Bible to John 3:16. That was her dynamic at the time. But today, her spiritual life is different. The growth has been phenomenal—it used to be me pulling her along, and now she’s the one leading me. Amen!
Ladies and gentlemen, you can build your spouse. That’s what makes a man a bridegroom—you groom your bride, and the bride can even exceed you. There are many men but few bridegrooms. In fact, there are many husbands but few bridegrooms. Husbands need to understand their role to function effectively, and one key ability is growing your spouse with patience. Marriage isn’t the coming together of two perfect hearts but two imperfect hearts walking toward perfection. It’s not easy—it never is—but marriage is worth fighting for.
