12/09/2025
Shyness doesn’t just appear overnight, it often grows from hidden roots deep within us.
For many, it starts in childhood:
constant criticism.
A child is always talked down on, whether by parents, guardians, uncles, or aunties. This chips away at their self-esteem.
A small mistake, and instead of correction, harsh words or name-calling follow. Some children are even mocked for their appearance.
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Parents might say things like “Fatty, come here” or “That short one!, not realizing those are the same words peers use to tease them.
Imagine the pain when the very people they should look up to join in the mockery. So, where will the self-esteem come from?
Children and teenagers need words of affirmation from their parents and guardians to accept themselves for who they are, especially in a society that holds rigid stereotypes about what beauty should look like.
Sadly, in many cultures, a child’s voice doesn’t matter unless it aligns with that of the parents. If a child expresses a thought that seems odd, they’re shut down with h*arsh*ness or even a sl*ap on the head. Some are told, “You talk too much.”
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Over time, the child becomes withdrawn, afraid of being labeled a talkative. There’s nothing wrong with correcting a child, but it must be done with love and respect for their feelings.
This write up gonna be long if u read to end u deserve a flower .
Comparison is another silent killer of self-esteem. When parents constantly compare one child to a smarter sibling or to other children, it leaves scars. The message is clear: “You’re not good enough.”
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Overprotective parenting also plays a role.
Out of love and fear of “bad influences,” some parents cage their children. They don’t allow them to mingle with friends, visit relatives during holidays, or even host friends. The intentions may be good, but the result is damaging, the child’s social life dies before it even begins.
And then, there’s ab*u*se. Ab*us*e in any form, physical, emotional, or verbal, doesn’t just hurt in the moment. It forces the child into a shell, making them withdrawn and fearful of the world around them.
Children are humans with feelings. They deserve guidance wrapped in love, not words or actions that tear them down.
I'm mercy Ahunanya.
Your brand strategist, AI enthusiastic coach, and step up Coach.
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I help new brands to build their brands, acquire AI skill, step up their personal growth and monetize them.
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