21/09/2024
November 2023: The Month That Tamed a Lion 🦁
A month that felt more like a year. A month that stripped me raw, leaving me a husk of the man I once was. I lost everything, my entire world, in a matter of days. My laptop, my phone, my job, my dreams - all vanished into thin air. The weight of depression, an insidious beast that had been gnawing at me for far too long, finally struck its fatal blow.
But the real gut punch came on December 1st, when the one person I thought would be my rock abandoned me. She left, slamming the door shut on her way out, a stark reminder of my worthlessness in her eyes. I saw it coming, clear as day, but refused to believe it. I was too used to giving people chances, to hoping for the best even when all signs pointed to the worst.
The loss of my creative spark, the desire to sing, write, and create, was the final nail in the coffin. I spiraled into a deep, dark abyss, contemplating and attempting su***de multiple times. Self-doubt gnawed at me, and I turned to substances to numb the pain. Home became a desolate wasteland, a place of solitude and despair. Only two true friends stood by my side, their unwavering support a lifeline in the storm.
Christmas, a time of joy and celebration, was a bleak affair for me. While others were enjoying the festivities, I was drowning in sorrow. I didn't leave my estate until February, a prisoner of my own mind.
I was traumatized, a shell of the man I once was. My careless decisions, my misplaced trust, had led me to this desolate place. Anger, a foreign emotion to my usually cheerful disposition, consumed me. I hated myself so much, I shattered every mirror in my home, unable to bear the sight of my own reflection.
In February, a glimmer of hope appeared. A new laptop, a lifeline in the digital world. While I still had my iPad, it was useless for business purposes. But even with this new tool, I found myself lacking the motivation to rebuild my life. It was during this darkest hour that I found God. I questioned why He would listen to my prayers, but He did.
Picking up the shattered pieces of myself was a Herculean task. But the hardest part was rediscovering who I was and what I truly wanted.
It's a long story, one filled with pain, despair, and ultimately, redemption.
Through the ashes of my old life, a new, stronger version of myself has emerged. I've trained and mentored countless creatives, helping them reach their full potential. I've recorded new music, ready to share with the world. I've discovered new business ventures and pursued them with unwavering determination
I've learned that giving up is never an option. I've faced adversity head-on and emerged victorious. I'm proud of my battle scars, the badges of honor I earned in the fight for my life. I was rescued from destruction, and for that, I am eternally grateful to God and to myself for not pulling the trigger on an amazing future for the sake of what was meant to be a real life lesson.