Silver Linings Project

02/07/2025

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02/07/2025

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DON'T WANT TO MERELY SURVIVE, BUT TO LIVE

I have been slipping in and out of depression since 2012 and was diagnosed as bipolar in 2015. I've been to psychiatrists, psychologists, doctors of philosophy, therapists and natural medical doctor. I am under medication for more than 2 years now and it has taken a toll on my body; experiencing side effects such as weight gain, hair loss, drowsiness and challenges in memory retention. Suicidal thoughts and hopelessness keep rearing their ugly heads. Finding the right cure is a series of trial and error. Doctors' fee and medications are so expensive yet are not covered by insurance. Worse, there is still a stigma in this modern age. I experienced it first hand. I lost friends, ridiculed by society, demoted at work, and robbed of my freedom that I started doubting myself making matters worse.

But here I am now, stronger than ever with every recovery from every relapse. God is so good surrounding me with His unfailing love through family and friends, a great company with compassionate owners and understanding workmates, and a vision and mission of being a living testament that there is hope.

Whether bipolar or depression, I don't care. This sickness does not define me anymore. I've been through a lot. My heart's been shattered but it is still beating. My wings are broken but I can still fly. And I have decided that i dont want to merely survive, but to live.

For all of you out there, there is hope. Life is still beautiful. We don't have to stay broken. Be patient and give yourselves time to heal. There will be setbacks but with God's grace, everything will fall into place. You will then see that proverbial light at the end of the long, dark tunnel; the rainbow after the rain; the silver linings in every cloud; a realization why this and that have to happen. Love, you're not alone - I'm gonna stand by you!!

02/07/2025

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FEBRUARY - LONGEST MONTH EVER

Back in February 2010, I lost my Mommy. She was terminally ill but never questioned God’s ways. Her faith was unwavering. It was a difficult month; I had an operation here in Makati while she was confined in Bohol. Neither of us knew about each others conditions. While lying on my hospital bed, I was worrying how to still send her meds not knowing the doctors have given up and she was just under pain management to ease the suffering until such time death knocks. I got to spend with her the three final weeks during my medical leave. When I arrived at the hospital, she was worried how skinny I had become, but not a tiny bit worried about herself. She was prepared to die; excited to meet the Lord. And she prepared the rest of us for her passing. I have never cried in front of the family in the entire ordeal, I forbid myself for doing so. I have to stay strong and keep the family together. But in our private time, while I sing the song she taught me “Here Today, Gone Tomorrow”, I cried a river and she held my hand. I was again Mommy’s little girl, vulnerable and weak. And through her eyes she told me it’s ok, everything will be ok. On February 26, 2010, surrounded with family and friends, she peacefully passed away. I used to be afraid of dying; not anymore knowing she’ll be waiting for me on the other side.

Fast forward to February 2018, here’s a glimpse of what transpired:
Jan 29 to Feb 2 - Depression started but I was still able to report for work
Feb 3 to 8 - I was in bed the whole time, started eating once a day only, and suicidal thoughts started rearing its ugly head
Feb 9 to 23 - I decided to move from the company provided condo to the previous condo I stayed in together with my college friends because I noticed I not only think of su***de but started acting on it such as looking in the balcony and contemplating on jumping over and 2 other means of self harm. I couldn't trust my self-control anymore so I need to be with someone and avoid being alone. I was hanging by a thread and the only thing that kept me holding on is the thought of how my family and friends would feel after I take my own life. I don’t want them to feel guilty and question themselves with what ifs their whole lives. In fact, I even planned to do it the same day my Mommy passed away, February 26 so it would be a shared grief when my family remembers my death, thinking it might be a little easier for them as the years go on.
Feb 24 to 28 - depression period is over and have shifted to manic state. In the last 5 days, I slept for only 6 hours in total but stayed calm and collected, with much energy, and my brain is functioning much better than when I am in my normal stage.

Usually, I have depression for not more than 2 weeks only and manic for only 2 days. A day after the depression stage, I couldn't sleep but will be able to do so the following night once I take Benadryl for drowsiness. This time, depression doubled to 4 weeks, and manic almost tripled from 2 to 5 days even if I was taking Benadryl for 4 straight nights. I was off the pharmaceutical drugs for 2.5 months now; I gradually reduce the intake from June to November 2017 and shifted to naturopathy (healthy diet, exercise, support group, etc). I had a checkup with my psychiatrist and she put me back to pharmaceutical drugs (Encorate) now with double dosage for a month and gave me a different sleeping pills (Lupilan). She advised that I rest for a month, take the medicines, and have a follow up checkup on April 6. I was able to have 8 hours of deep, uninterrupted sleep last night and is now on the road of stabilizing my moods and normalizing my sleep pattern.

God is great, depression was over 2 days before my planned “departure” date. It was very difficult for me to pray and I just couldn’t feel a connection when I do so when I am in a depressed stage. Thank you for all the people who prayed for me when I couldn’t do it for myself. I must have done something good to deserve your presence in my life. Or maybe perhaps Mommy has sown a lot of goodness in her lifetime that to this day and for the years to come, I shall continue to reap. I am blessed and surrounded with love from family and friends.

To God be the glory!! Thank you Lord for the strength to conquer another battle.

02/07/2025

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CHEERS TO 2023!!

2020 to 2022 - 3 long, hard, grueling years as I struggle with bipolar disorder, failed business ventures and the pandemic that paralyzed the world.

I have been having depression every month from January 2020 until December 2021; a vicious cycle that has been haunting me since 2013. It has gotten worse despite being on medication. I got depressed for two weeks, manic for a couple of days, normal for less than 2 weeks. Repeat. Suicidal thoughts are a constant companion, rearing its ugly head every month, never failing to visit. I visited 2 new psychiatrists in a span of two years on top of my old psychiatrist who I talked to online from Cebu since the pandemic prevented travels. I also consulted 2 therapists along the way. I had a full-blown manic episode in March 2021 lasting for about 3 weeks. It was a nightmare not only for me but also to my family. I lost 3 good-paying jobs and have ruined relationships along the way because of lack of communication during my depressed state.

Come 2022, I decided to gradually stop taking medications. I enrolled in a program that teaches meditation, yoga and good nutrition. I thought I was making progress, but it just altered the length of my episodes. Here is a summary:
January - depressed for 2 weeks, manic for 2 weeks
February - manic for 2 weeks, depressed for 2 weeks
March - depressed for 3 weeks, manic for 1 week
April - manic for 1 week, normal for 3 weeks
May - depressed for 4 weeks
June - manic for 1 week, normal for 3 weeks
July - normal for 2 weeks, depressed for 2 weeks
August - depressed for 4 weeks
September - depressed for 4 weeks
October - manic 1 week, normal 2 weeks, depressed 1 week
November - manic for 2 weeks, normal 1 week, depressed for 1 week
December - depressed for 3 weeks, manic for 1 week

It is a tiring journey and I just want to give up sometimes. Bipolar disorder keeps me crippled and paralyzed. I am so exhausted, fed up and I can’t seem to find a silver lining in the dark clouds. I am suffocating in the darkness; drowning in a big, black hole. I feel so terribly alone, utterly useless living a life with no purpose.

But I have a strong family and friends who support me, care for me and love me. Their patience and understanding are unwavering. Their prayers keep me going especially at times when I can no longer pray for myself and no longer feel the connection with God. Thank you to my siblings Jayson, Jaidee and Mervin; my nephews Daniel, Josh and Johanness; my YOLO college friends, Shell family, Bayer family, Miguel, friends from school, work and the community. You are all so very thoughtful and wonderful.

I am now having a fresh start and a new beginning in the land of the free and home of the brave. I started meditation, exercise and good nutrition again and will research further on how to make myself healthier mentally, physically and emotionally. No retreat, no surrender. Never give up, never give in.

Happy New Year! May we all have a happy, healthy and bountiful 2023!!

02/07/2025

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BIPOLAR AND BEAUTIFUL

Beautiful disaster. Hot mess. Living dead. Contrasting words that perfectly describe me.. Welcome to my life!

Mariah Carey, Mel Gibson, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Kristen Bell, Kanye West, Demi Lovato, JK Rowling, Carrie Fisher, Kurt Cobain, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Frank Sinatra, Marilyn Monroe, Winston Churchill, Ernest Hemingway, Vincent Van Gogh. Talented, geniuses, icons, legendary. And they all suffer from either depression or bipolar disorder. Then there’s me. I do not have a name as big as theirs. I may not be able to change the world but I hope to make a difference in the lives of the people who will come across my testimonies.

Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, Aaron Carter, Twitch, Mac Miller, Kate Spade, Mark Salling, Kurt Cobain, Chester Bennington, Freddie Prince, Ernest Hemingway, Vincent Van Gogh, Adolf Hi**er, Marilyn Monroe, other celebrities who died by overdose which may or may not be intentional. The ugly truth of su***de..

I have been contemplating su***de for the last 10 years and the last 3 years is a taste of hell for me. I have been having depression every month from January 2020 until December 2021. It has gotten worse despite being on medication. I got depressed for two weeks, manic for a couple of days, normal for less than 2 weeks. Repeat over and over again. Suicidal thoughts are a constant companion, rearing its ugly head every month, never failing to visit. I had a full-blown manic episode in March 2021 lasting for about 3 weeks. It was a nightmare not only for me but also for my family. I lost 3 good-paying jobs and have caused strain in my relationships primarily due to lack of communication when I am depressed. Come 2022, I decided to gradually stop taking medications. I enrolled in a program that teaches meditation, yoga and good nutrition. I thought I was making progress, but it just altered the length of my depressed and manic episodes, from weekly to monthly phases.

It is a tiring journey and I just want to give up sometimes. Bipolar disorder keeps me crippled and paralyzed. I am so exhausted, fed up and I can’t seem to find a silver lining in the dark clouds. I am suffocating in the darkness; drowning in a big, black hole. I feel so terribly alone, useless living a life with no purpose. People call me strong, brave, resilient.. having endured this illness for so long. But most of the time I just don’t want to be called resilient any longer. I want ease, I want to be among normal people, not patted in the back for how well I handle adversities.

But I have a strong family and friends who support me, care for me and love me. Their patience and understanding are unwavering. Their prayers keep me going especially at times when I can no longer pray for myself. When life gets too hard too handle, I remind myself to rest, reset, restart. Pause but never quit. Never give up, never give in. Pick myself up, dust myself off and ride life again. No retreat, no surrender.

But the brain is a complicated thing; mental illnesses have gray areas science have yet to discover. Suicidal thoughts can be so powerful it can overpower the will to live. Please understand that su***de doesn’t mean we want to die, we just want the pain to end. We are not killing ourselves. Mental illnesses are killing us. In case we lose the fight over su***de, there are important things we want you to know.

Knowing we are gonna die enables us to manage our affairs. Have that last will and testament recognized and honored. Make that life insurance known. Prepare our eulogy. Plan our memorial service. Convey if we want to be buried or cremated. We make death such a taboo topic instead of honoring it and celebrating the life lived instead. I don’t want a long funeral service. I don’t want flowers. Mourn for me for a day then cremate me and throw my ashes in the ocean. You can hold a celebration of my life with happy memories, food and drinks after my passing.

You have done more than enough and I am so grateful for you. I am so blessed to have you. Don't be too hard on yourselves. Don't blame yourselves that you didn't see the signs. I have been very transparent. Don't keep asking yourselves if you have done enough. You are enough. You have done enough. And you will do so much more so live your life, be happy and healthy. Life is so beautiful.

Know that I am in peace wherever I may be. I have finally made it to the other side. Don't say I am too young to die. Don't say that I have so much more to live for. I am happy and I am content with what I have. I had a good run. I achieved more than what others achieved in a hundred years. I have the faith that makes me calm and serene amidst the uncertainty of the afterlife; the unknown life after death. Besides, I'll be meeting my parents again. I am not afraid of dying knowing they'll be waiting for me on the other side. And to the ones left behind, please move on with your life with a happy heart. Mourn for me no more.

I am love. And love never dies. So when all that is left of me is love, give me away. Smile to that homeless man. Give that kid a hug. Feed the hungry. Help the poor. Care for the sick. Defend the weak. And when you do, I'm right there with you. Kissing you with the gentle breeze; hugging you with that mighty wind; sharing tearful joy and joyful tears through the rain coming down on a sunny day. And when you miss me, look for me in the people I have loved. And if you cannot live without me, let me live in your hearts, in your minds, in your acts of kindness.

I am not giving up just yet. I'll put up one hell of a fight with you. I will live to see tomorrow and tomorrow never ends just like me because I am love.

02/07/2025

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LOOKING BACK

I came across an unfinished journal I wrote back in August 12, 2016 and decided to continue and publish today. This may open old wounds that I have already tucked away for so long. My take? Well, time heals all wounds but the scars stay forever. Forgiven, not forgotten. And the irony of it all is being able to forgive someone who is not sorry in the first place. In so doing, I have released myself of all hurts and moved forward in life. At this point, nothing personal, really. I just want people to realize that there is hope and redemption. Keep going.

I have always been vocal that I prefer to be a wife and a mother and have full control of my time - at my disposal 24/7, without a boss. I never dream of entering the corporate world but God’s plans are better than mine. The course I took in college was unplanned since my first choice was not included in the scholarship grant. Long story short, I became a CPA. Then I learned my educational assistance from my Dad’s pension will be until I am 27 so I again took some units in Law and finished MBA.

My first big stint was with Shell. It’s been 6 years since I left and so many have transpired. One thing’s for sure though, I will be forever grateful because I was equipped through all the trainings Shell invested on me in my 4-year stay. Shell sent me to the United States several times and paved the way for many other opportunities beyond what I could hope for (which reminds me to renew my visa about to expire in 2 months!). After I left Shell, Bayer took me in and let me see parts of Europe and Asia Pacific. I transferred to two more companies taking roles which are a notch higher than the previous making me climb the corporate ladder pretty fast. More than travelling the world, what I treasure the most are the people I worked with who molded me to the person I am now. Our relationships extend far beyond the four corners of the office; like a string of fate connecting us wherever life leads us.

Then my life took a detour. I have frequent episodes of depression and was diagnosed as bipolar. With a broken spirit and not quite liquid, I decided to take some time off, leave my job and went back home to family. People who don’t understand and who only know half-truth of my inner battles can be very cruel sometimes. They insinuate and make me feel ungrateful for leaving a job almost everyone dreams of. At 31 years old, I had one of the top positions in a multinational company reporting directly to the CEO, yearly business trips to Europe and elsewhere, great compensation and benefits, work-life balance, and the list goes on. What more can I ask for? But my reasons are far beyond what can be seen by the naked eyes.

The past 2 years have been rough; second toughest to the time I lost my mother to cancer simultaneous with my own medical operation. I have experienced being told straight to my face that I am delusional and should hide so as not to be a disturbance when depression and manic episodes strike, good for nothing, ambitious in a bad light, smart but has not proven anything and is now a nobody, liar, shameless, not worthy of respect, lazy, abnormal, lacks delicadeza, penniless, buried in debts, makes me a trending topic with their friends, cheap, crazy, must not be given value in this world, war freak, and degrades my physical look and mental health. Those words are direct english translations from the vernacular. Never did it occur to me that a person who can say such things exist; I thought it happens only in movies. To make things worse, they post publicly in Facebook things that are half-truth and makeup versions of the real story, degrades my family who wasn’t involved in the first place, dragged several names of people in the community, threatens to divulge that I was admitted in a mental facility, threatens my life itself, and humiliates us by spreading offensive words. To make things even worse, some believed and disconnected from me. Two of them go to my closest friends saying I am “maldita” and I talk ill behind my friends’ backs. People who do not understand say it all started because of a trivial, empty bottle of whisky. But it runs deeper than that – it’s about respect, honoring one’s word, and standing up for what you believe is right.

I can either entertain the bad vibes or choose silence as the better argument. I prefer the latter. I chose my battle and walked away from these toxic people who are baggages I least need in my life. Those who know me won’t believe the tasteless rumors; they in fact defended me. And those who believe the rumors are bored, mediocre people as the source. Now, 18 months later, I am in a happier, healthier, and more successful state. I was able to land a great job with the best salary package I ever had, a nice working arrangements I didn’t have for the last 8 years of my career life, and a challenging yet fulfilling work. I am now at peace with myself and the world, living life to the fullest.

Thank you Lord. My

02/07/2025

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A GLIMPSE OF MY JOURNEY

I could pretty much say that I had a comfortable life. My father provided very well for our needs; my mother's faith kept our family full of love and happiness; and I get along very well with my siblings. I was an achiever in school, always at the top of my class and winning competitions here and there. I also got great jobs in multinational companies and climbed the corporate ladder very fast. People would always say I have no reasons to be depressed and to just snap out of it.

But depression is a real, mental illness. Let's put it this way - you do not tell a cancer patient to just snap out of it, or a person with diabetes that it's only in his mind. Depression can affect anyone - even person with relatively ideal circumstances. It may be caused by a combination of chemical imbalance in the brain, genetics, personality and environmental factors. The cure is a series of trial and error. But it must be done holistically.

Here's a glimpse of what I go through when depression strikes. It may have no triggers at all, or the trigger is insignificant, or it can also be so big that it prolongs the period. My depressed periods last for a week to up to 6 weeks; recent intervals are from 1 to 6 months. I can just wake up one morning and the dark cloud has set in again. It is not just a feeling of sadness, but a feeling of nothingness and despair, or a lack of feelings altogether. It is also a lack of vitality. I no longer enjoy what I used to enjoy doing. Getting out of bed and even taking a shower is a humongous task. I sleep all the time to escape my reality, and eat once a day just for the sake of saying I had eaten. I shut myself from the rest of the world; a message or a call is so hard to do especially because how do you answer a person asking how you are? There seems to be no hope and a future. Several times I wanted to end my life. The only thing that keeps me holding on is the thought of my family being hurt and scarred for life. Many nights I pray to the Lord to end my life instead, to let me die in my sleep. And each morning I wake up, disappointment would greet me.

And after the episode, the sun will shine again. I begin to live again and catch up where I left off. Stronger than ever with every recovery from every relapse. Learning a thing or two on the experience. My family, friends and people at work would know - at times when they no longer hear from me, I'm going through that phase again and needs some time off to clear my head and let the storm pass. It is a difficult ordeal not just for me but for the people around me. But there is a reason for everything, and I am positive I will live to tell my story and help others. To God be the glory!!

02/07/2025

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

From the bottom of my broken heart, thank you for all the love and prayers through the years. “Oh I'm in pieces, it's tearing me up. But I know, a heart that's broke is a heart that's been loved.” - Ed Sheeran (Supermarket Flowers)

This is the face of a person who was seriously contemplating of ending her life 5 days ago. I actually don’t want to die, I just want the pain to end, I’m dying inside anyway. At my lowest low, I just want to cave in and fight no more. I had a full-blown depression which started from homesickness, lack of sleep, not eating healthy and rejections - one after the other. The irony of it all is that this episode occured in-between two volunteer works I did for su***de prevention. After 12 depressed days, 3 hyper days with just 4 hours of sleep and losing 4 pounds in the process, I’m glad to say I am on my way to recovery.

The rainbow is starting to appear after the rain and I can again see the cloud’s silver linings. There is still a sting of feeling lost, frustrated and unwanted but I am working on overcoming them soonest.

And today, as a gift to myself, I chose to be happy and postpone my concerns for tomorrow. Live in the moment, enjoy the present. Tomorrow is never guaranteed so live life one day at a time.

And always remember, be kind to one another. We don’t know what the other person is going through. It’s free to be kind and it’s priceless. A quick check in or a smile can make someone’s gloomy day a little brighter. It just might be that one thing that prevented the person from commiting su***de. Save a life, be kind! 💖✨

02/07/2025

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MOMMY, MY LITTLE ANGEL

Your behavior can be a bit strangely inappropriate Mommy. You made me a shirt that matched our pillow cases. Imagine my embarrassment when visitors came and saw me in synch with the pillows! Most of the time, you talk too much and scold too long! It was very annoying to learn my not having a boyfriend was a constant topic among your friends, and you gave out my phone number for potential dates. Well, I guess a mother's love led you to do the atypical.

There are some things I want you to know. I love how you fondly call me “Anak” and your usual reminder of “Magdasal ha, pagtawid-tawid, God bless” each time I bid goodbye. I miss our videoke sessions, after-office dates, and bonding over late-night shows. Sorry for making you worry when I missed my stop back in college and you had to wait for me anxiously in a shed by the side of the road on a dark, rainy night. I still miss my stop up to now, in fact I just got lost two weeks ago, and I remembered that fateful night each time. I am sorry for the time I made you cry; I wasn’t in the mood and got pi**ed off with your questions. If I could turn back the time, I’d gladly take that day off from work to be with you wherever.

You were terminally ill but never questioned God’s ways. Your faith was unwavering. It was a difficult month; I had an operation here in Makati while you were confined in Bohol. Neither of us knew about our conditions. While lying on my hospital bed, I was worrying how I can still send your meds not knowing the doctors have given up and you were just under pain management to ease the suffering until such time death knocks. I got to spend with you your three final weeks during my medical leave. When I arrived at the hospital, you were worried how skinny I had become, but not a tiny bit worried for yourself. You were already prepared; excited to meet the Lord. You even told us what you wanted to wear for the funeral. You prepared the rest of us for your passing. I have never cried in front of the family in the entire ordeal, I forbid myself from doing so. But in our private time together, while I sing the song you taught me "Here Today, Gone Tomorrow", I cried a river and you held my hand. I was again mommy's little girl, vulnerable and weak. And with your eyes, you told me it's ok, everything will be ok. When it was time for me to return to work, I said my goodbye trying hard to be casual even if I was breaking inside. I feared that goodbye will be forever; dreaded the next flight back home will be for the funeral. And for the last time you told me, "Magdasal ha, pagtawid-tawid, God bless". Four days after I decided to come home. I knew you were in so much pain but you waited for your little girl. We held hands, kissed, prayed, and surrounded with family and friends, you peacefully passed away.

Thank you for being all that you are Mommy. Thank you for raising us well. You have sown a lot of goodness that to this day and for the years to come, we shall continue to reap. We are blessed and surrounded with love from family and friends. I used to be afraid of dying; not anymore knowing you’ll be waiting for me on the other side. I miss you, I love you, until we meet again Mommy...

02/07/2025

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MY CHICAGO JOURNEY

Chicago is my Top 1 US City. It got everything I need plus a few extra ones I want. From the very hospitable Filipino community who treated me like family; to abundant and affordable food so I can eat healthy and combat depression; to the extensive coverage of its train system which made me explore almost the whole of Illinois state, among others.

I am just thankful for the rollercoaster ride I had in my stay here. From heartbreaks to breakthroughs; from being broken to being whole again; from learning to prioritize myself and nurture self-love realizing I can love other people so much better if I love myself first.

I went to church on my last day having a thankful heart. I didn’t ask for anything, no prayer requests, no “Lord I want this, give me that”. I only prayed with a heart full of gratitude for God’s love and faithfulness to His promises to me. He indeed lifts me up when I am down, He made me feel His presence through all the great people He sent my way. It was the best Sunday Service I ever attended in that church, it being the first Sunday of Advent. The service was great, the choir awesome, the welcoming for the new church goers nice and warm. I was even told when I get back, I have to join the choir regularly.

5 minutes and 1 mile after I left church, without lifting a finger, I received the answered prayer of my heart’s fervent desire. A desire I nurtured and cultivated for six months. But those six months were filled with hopes, then frustrations, then realizations and learnings, and then trying again. Three cycles, one after the other. My beat-up heart is thankful and hopeful again and this time around it will be for real, it will be the realization of my hopes and dreams not only for myself but for my family and loved ones.

God, you never fail to amaze me. You have given me much more than what I can ever ask for or imagine. You are indeed a good God, all the time. Even if at times I cannot hear You or feel You, You never left me. I just have to put my trust in You knowing Your ways are better than mine.

My heart overflows! 💖✨

02/07/2025

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MY 2018 SILVER LINING

The first half of the year had been very challenging. I was having depression almost every month, with the dark clouds staying for around two weeks each time. I decided to resign from work last July to give myself time to recuperate. It was a hard decision. Giving up a fulfilling job with a good working environment, great people, and generous salary and benefits is not easy. Many tried to talk me out of it. But then I thought, if I don’t give myself a break, I might end up being broken beyond repair. With money I saved to last for at least six months, the time I gave myself to heal, I went home to be with my family.

There are times, I admit, that I would question myself if I made the right decision. I would ask God why I had to go through this broken road again. And I got my answer through my favorite verse in the Bible that says “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path”.

Lo and behold, two months into my vacation, I received an invitation to come to the US. If I had a regular job back then, I wouldn’t have accepted the offer. It’s amazing how the broken road led me to “the land of the free and the home of the brave”. I am now living my dreams, happy and contented, blessed and grateful, and I have not been depressed since July!!

Sometimes, our lives have to be completely shaken up to lead us to where we are meant to be. The darkest times can bring us to the brightest places. What seems like a roadblock or a dead end will make us discover that we are meant to travel down a different path. Surrender to God’s surprises. His plans are far better than what we can think of or imagine.