29/06/2025
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๐๐๐๐๐๐๐] ๐๐ซ๐จ๐ฐ๐ง๐ข๐ง๐ ๐๐ฅ๐จ๐ซ๐ฒ: ๐๐ฅ๐ข๐ญ๐ณ ๐๐ง๐ ๐๐ซ๐ข๐ญ ๐จ๐ ๐๐ข๐๐ ๐๐ง๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ฒ
It was Wednesday afternoon. The noise from the radio filled Michaelโs quiet balcony. He sits silently while watching his favorite noon show.
He then gestured to a huge box near his room. Inside were full of make-ups and glitters. From there, he showed an old picture of a pretty young woman, it was him.
And in that solemn midday, where the room eclipsed the bright rainbow, he told stories on how beautiful he was.
๐จ ๐บ๐๐๐ ๐ฐ๐ ๐ฉ๐๐๐
During regular days back then, Michael Gatmaitan faced unending long walks with his box full of hair products for his on-call rebond business, where he lingered towards every alley to find a woman in need of hair touch-ups. In these same busy streets, Michael was often overlooked by the crowd.
At night, however, Michael was the crowdโs sweetheart. He goes by the stage name Amaya. A local showgirl donning striking gowns and impactful performances that toured every pageant in Bataan.
โIba para sa akin ang pageant eh. Iyun bang kapag nakarinig ako ng isang Miss Gay competition, parang feeling ko hindi magiging kumpleto โyung pageant na โyun kung wala si Amaya,โ she shared
Amaya thought of her first time wearing a gown in public. She was 14 at the time and wanted to be part of the local Sagala parade. Off her Loloโs income on their then lending business, she got her first rented gown. Amaya doesnโt have any idea on how to do drag then, all she has is a gown and a dream.
Forged by the tapestry of life, Amaya viewed this new-discovered world as a way to not only express herself but also to make a living. For years, joining pageants has become a way for Amaya to make ends meet. Every vibrant color in her make-up wears the blood and sweat of her dedication towards life and fame.
โAng pinaka-memorable talaga na pageant noon is year 2002. Iyon ang kauna-unahang Binibining Ikatlong Lahi ng Balanga. Ang mga kalaban ko talaga [noon] mga nakapag-aral. Kaya hindi ko rin in-expect [manalo] kasi noong time na โyun highschool lang ang nayari ko,โ she recalled.
Amaya marked her legacy in pageantry as a lip sync performer, offering fierce performances on every talent portion of Miss Gay competitions.
She looked back on when she was fortunate enough to save some money for her Darna costume. It was at Miss Gay Sexy of Samal in 1998 when she showed the piece she was working hard on for the first time.
On that stage, when the beat of Amayaโs favorite piece starts โ the 1980s classic โHolding Out to a Heroโ by Bonnie Tyler, she transforms into a lip sync sensation that captures every sight of the crowd and makes her memorable on every pageant she's been on.
โWalang Miss Gay na hindi ako โyung inaabangan noon. Kasi kapag nagta-talent ako, laging buwis buhay. Kapag tumatalon ako may mga sugat basta makuha ko lang ang Miss Talent,โ Amaya said.
๐ฉ๐๐๐๐๐
๐๐๐ ๐ช๐๐๐๐
But along with her rising reputation, Amaya admits that it was not an easy way to be a pageant veteran in Bataan. For her, the secret to winning is not about being the best but about learning how to lose.
It is not only on pageant youโll learn the lessons of defeat. In her entire life, Amaya has been the breadwinner for her family. Jumping from one job to another taught her how to persevere in life โ especially if you are in a marginalized community like the LGBTQIA+.
โโYung pagiging kontesera ko ang dahilan kung bakit nabuhay kami. That time ako โyung Miss Gay noon na salat talaga. Nagdalaga ako ng mahirap na talagang walang-wala. โYung mga kalaban ko talagang may kaya na sa buhay, may pinag-aralan, at may suporta sa magulang. Ako baliktad, ako naman ang inaasahan ng pamilya namin,โ Amaya said.
In these times, she resorted to the small amount of pageant prizes as her way to provide for her family. The average cash prize for a normal barangay gay pageant back then was around PHP3,000 to PHP5,000 only.
Even though this prize is not enough for her living, she still pursued the career throughout half of her life. Joining pageants after pageants and sacrificing her time was her only way to gather enough money to support her and her family.
This was also the time where she was open with the opportunity to continue her career overseas. Amaya was offered to work in Kuwait as an entertainer. Fortunately enough to stay a year there, away from her family to save some money.
โDoon sa Kuwait nagsimula ang karera ng buhay ko. Dito nagpapakahirap ako kumita ng isang libo samantalang doon kaunting kembot mo lang, ang tip mo na katumbas na ng isang libo. Kaya nakaipon ako doon,โ Amaya said.
However, she was awakened by how the locals take advantage of her and her job.
โFeeling ko kasi nasasalaula na ako doon, kaya tinapos ko na ng mga one year, nag-stop na akoโฆ Ang life ko noong umuwi ako sa Pilipinas from Kuwait, balik na naman sa dati,โ Amaya said.
Amaya goes back to her local hairdressing job, during her free time, she would moonlight on local pageants still. This time, with fresher gowns and costumes out of the money she saved from working overseas.
Her name was then became known enough even from outside of the province, which pushed her to audition on national T.V.
In 1995, Amaya joined hundreds of hopefuls in the Super Sireyna auditions at GMA Network. She made it through the first cut but was sent home to bring more back-ups right before sheโll be aired.
โNag-audition ako noon binigyan na ako ng yellow card pero pinapabalik ako, โbring more backups,โ daw eh hindi ko naman kaya bayaran ang backup. Kaya ang panget ng bakla ka na kumu-contest nang hindi mo kayang suportahan ang sarili mo. Ang sakit sa akin noon kasi โyun โyung opportunity na hindi ko nagawa kaya dinaan ko na lang sa mga contest ulit dito,โ Amaya confessed.
With her caliber of pageantry, you would think amaya has it all, but throughout her career, she still thought of the things she lost and the things she couldโve been.
๐จ๐๐
๐ฐ ๐ป๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐
โAng essence pala ng pagiging isang kontesera ay โyung malalaman mo na darating pala ang time na mage-end na. Kahit na maganda ka, tapos na. Na kahit na subukan mo pa rin, wala na,โ Amaya looking back on her time now.
At the hallmark of what seems to be her world, Amaya made it known that, if anything, winning is all about learning how to lose.
Looking back, Amaya sits silently on the balcony of her own home. Now, her aging body, swallowed by a loose shirt, still exudes pomp and elegance.
She talked about the new gen pageant-goers today and how nostalgic it seems for her to witness the joy of the youngbloods that she used to feel when she was still an amateur.
But like her, Amaya left a lesson she learned for these new breed of pageant goers in Bataan.
โAng pinakanatutunan ko is kapag pala lagi kang nanalo at nakatikim ka ng talo, dapat mong tanggapin na nanalo ka. Kahit gaano ka pa kagaling minsan sumasablay ka talaga,โ Amaya closed.
Now, the least she can do is to help bridge the hopefuls towards starting their own career, hoping that they will find the same joy she once discovered in the world of pageantry.
And as the curtain closes and the glitz starts to dull on her reign, Amaya is poised that her name will be remembered. As Amaya who won many crowns in pageantry, and as Michael who won many battles in life.
โWalang silbi ang pageant kung lagi kang tatamarin, ako kasi kahit umuulan o ano man, lalaban ako kasi dapat lagi lang lumalaban,โ Amaya said.
***
Decades passed and the name Amaya is still engraved in the world of pageantry even with her retirement today.
In the silent balcony, Michael sits silently at the same place Amaya built both of their dreams.
Amidst the fading glitz of the past, he moves forward to tell how beautiful his life was โ as himself, and as Amaya. Afterall, it is hard to miss a vibrant rainbow.
โ
Words by John Michael Pascubillo
Photos by Tayshaun Ecaldre
Design by Rogel Jean Gerald Vitangcol