26/05/2025
Dearest Lord,
I am afraid of so many things, and one of those is choosing.
Not because I wanted to hoard everything in my hands, but because of my own heart: this frail heart that tends to choose that which is safe, and easy, and selfish, and wrong.
I’m afraid of this little thing You’ve placed inside my chest that seems to have the power to rule over all my being. You gave me something I find so impossible to tame. I tend to put the blame on You sometimes but then I remember, along with it, You gave me the power to control. And along with those, you gave me the freedom to choose.
So here I am, again, clueless of this test called choosing.
This appears to come on every crossroad that I face — this choosing thing that I so disdain. And what makes it harder for me is that You always give me two things that both seem good. Now, that seems okay with me, until You told me I have to be wise enough to choose which is best. And how can I know unless You show me?
Tests after tests. I don’t know until when I could be able to pass them all.
Year after year, they look more difficult for me to believe that I can.
So I pray, will all gravity of heart, that if one day I’d come to a point where You have to make me choose among the hardest of Your tests, will You help me choose this one needful thing?
Will You help me choose faith?
I know it’s somewhat absurd for a student to ask his teacher to help him know the answer to the test he’s given. But I believe that You are the kind of a teacher whose aim is not to fail His student; I believe Your goal is to make me wiser.
So help me choose faith:
Help me not to settle on what’s easy;
to have the strength to say no to myself;
to hold on Your promises alone;
to let go of whatever You ask from me;
to have the heart to believe in the impossible;
to put my hope in reckless abandon to Your will;
to leave in Your hands the consequences with a glad surrender;
and to have the intensity to trust and obey whatever be the cost.
In this life, I might have made many wrong choices. But this time Lord,
above all, whatever it may take to accomplish this, I’m leaving in Your hands the right to make me choose You — Your will, not mine.
This is me at my best telling You before You ever ask, I’m choosing You, dear Jesus. But let my words be true.
By Your Grace Alone,
The One You’ve Chosen First
“Ye have not chosen me, but I have chosen you, and ordained you, that ye should go and bring forth fruit, and that your fruit should remain: that whatsoever ye shall ask of the Father in my name, he may give it you.” – John 15:16
-TheLetterMinistry