19/10/2025
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๐๐๐ญ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ | ๐๐ก๐ ๐๐๐๐ซ๐ญโ๐ฌ ๐๐๐ซ๐๐๐จ๐ฑ
๐๐จ ๐ซ๐ข๐ฌ๐ค ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฏ๐ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐ญ๐จ ๐ซ๐ข๐ฌ๐ค ๐ก๐๐๐ซ๐ญ๐๐ซ๐๐๐ค, ๐ญ๐จ ๐๐ฏ๐จ๐ข๐ ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฏ๐ ๐ข๐ฌ ๐ญ๐จ ๐ซ๐ข๐ฌ๐ค ๐ ๐ฅ๐ข๐๐ ๐ฎ๐ง๐ฐ๐ซ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐๐ง.
So, which pain is heavier to bear?
This age-old question deeply lingers in the hearts of many. So thought-out that it was found in between the lines of literature and prose. So thought-out it lingered in the hearts of young teens, even causing mental health concerns. According to the Young Adult Fertility and Sexuality Study (YAFS 2021), the number of young Filipinos experiencing moderate to severe depressive symptoms has more than doubled in just eight years. From 9.6% in 2013 to 20.9% in 2021.
Behind those statistics are stories of people who loved deeply, lost painfully, and tried to move forward quietly. For some, the wounds that come with having once loved someone is something that may never fully heal. With time, a scab may form, giving the bleeding gash a layer of protection so the pain may be forgotten once in a while. But sometimes, those scabs get picked on. And the wounds start bleeding all over again. Until a scar forms, a reminder of the pain and the love that was lost. For others, the fear of love keeps them guarded. They build a wall around their heart because they are so afraid of the heartbreak that comes with entrusting your heart to someone. They choose safety over vulnerability. After seeing the people around them losing their minds over such a thing they canโt seem to understand the importance of.
Yet both choices still carry their own sorrow. ๐๐ง๐ ๐ข๐ง ๐ญ๐ก๐ ๐ฆ๐๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ๐ฒ ๐จ๐ ๐ฐ๐ก๐๐ญ ๐ฐ๐๐ฌ, ๐๐ง๐ ๐ญ๐ก๐ ๐จ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ซ ๐ข๐ง ๐ญ๐ก๐ ๐๐ฆ๐ฉ๐ญ๐ข๐ง๐๐ฌ๐ฌ ๐จ๐ ๐ฐ๐ก๐๐ญ ๐๐จ๐ฎ๐ฅ๐ ๐ก๐๐ฏ๐ ๐๐๐๐ง.
โ๐๐จ๐ฏ๐ ๐๐๐ง ๐ก๐ฎ๐ซ๐ญ, ๐๐ฎ๐ญ ๐ข๐ญ ๐๐ฅ๐ฌ๐จ ๐ก๐๐ฅ๐ฉ๐ฌ ๐ฎ๐ฌ ๐ ๐ซ๐จ๐ฐ,โ says psychologist Dr. Anna Cristina Tuazon. โ๐๐ญ ๐ญ๐๐๐๐ก๐๐ฌ ๐๐ฆ๐ฉ๐๐ญ๐ก๐ฒ, ๐ซ๐๐ฌ๐ข๐ฅ๐ข๐๐ง๐๐, ๐๐ง๐ ๐ฌ๐๐ฅ๐-๐๐ฐ๐๐ซ๐๐ง๐๐ฌ๐ฌ โ ๐ญ๐ก๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ฌ ๐ฐ๐ ๐ง๐๐๐ ๐ญ๐จ ๐ญ๐ก๐ซ๐ข๐ฏ๐.โ
This question has haunted writers and hopeless romantics for centuries. Is the sweetness of love truly worth the sting of loss? Or is it safer to keep oneโs heart unscarred?
For those who have loved and lost, the pain can seem unbearable at first. ๐๐๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ๐ข๐๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ฎ๐ซ๐ง ๐ข๐ง๐ญ๐จ ๐ ๐ก๐จ๐ฌ๐ญ๐ฌ, ๐ก๐๐ฎ๐ง๐ญ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ฆ ๐๐ญ ๐ง๐ข๐ ๐ก๐ญ. A song on the radio, a familiar scent or phrase can bring back the most effervescent of memories.. then a reminder follows that it is now just a memory. Yet many who have these scars etched on their skin say they would not trade them for emptiness. โAt least I knew what it felt like,โ one might say, their voice heavy with a bittersweet amalgamation of feelingsโgrief and gratitude. An inexplicable feeling of pain for the genuine love that they had, but grateful for the memory. For the happiness that was short-lived. For having known that person, and being theirs. Not regret. Not a feeling that their love went to waste, down the drain. Because they believe that to love is never a waste. ๐๐จ๐ฎ ๐ฐ๐ข๐ฅ๐ฅ ๐ง๐๐ฏ๐๐ซ ๐๐จ๐ซ๐ ๐๐ญ ๐ ๐ฉ๐๐ซ๐ฌ๐จ๐ง ๐ฐ๐ก๐จ ๐ฅ๐จ๐ฏ๐๐ ๐ฒ๐จ๐ฎ.
On the other side, some may choose silence and safety. They may have a belief that to never love deeply is to never risk being broken. The heart may remain intact, and the soul unshaken. But perhaps alsoโฆ untouched. But is a life without the experience of the fiery passion of love truly a shield, or simply another kind of emptiness? As theologians remind us, even Christโs commandment centers on love. To love God and to love one another. Can we fulfill our purpose if we refuse to risk the very thing that defines our humanity?
๐๐๐ซ๐ก๐๐ฉ๐ฌ ๐ญ๐ก๐ ๐ซ๐๐๐ฅ ๐ช๐ฎ๐๐ฌ๐ญ๐ข๐จ๐ง ๐ข๐ฌ ๐ง๐จ๐ญ ๐ฐ๐ก๐ข๐๐ก ๐ฉ๐๐ญ๐ก ๐ก๐ฎ๐ซ๐ญ๐ฌ ๐ฎ๐ฌ ๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ๐, ๐๐ฎ๐ญ ๐ฐ๐ก๐ข๐๐ก ๐ฉ๐๐ญ๐ก ๐ฌ๐ก๐๐ฉ๐๐ฌ ๐ฎ๐ฌ ๐ฆ๐จ๐ซ๐. Love, in its purest form, carries both joy and suffering. And both of these emotions are teachers. To love and lose is to learn how to be resilient, empathetic, and grateful. It also teaches us the fragile beauty of existence. A reminder that just because it is short-lived doesnโt mean it wasnโt meaningful. Love will always be a double-edged sword. To never love is to live in safety, but perhaps also in the shadows. Unaware of the depths our hearts are capable of. The choice between pain and peace will forever be a discussion.
The pain of remembering or the pain of wondering?
Written by: Precious Keith D. Lucero
Layout by: Karielle B. Julaton