05/08/2026
- Running Out of Time -
I came across an Instagram reel about training as a father.
About trusting the process, believing in the work you are putting in, while battling the fear of running out of time.
Because I know I won't always be this strong.
A time will come when I won't be able to run as far, climb as high, or push my body the way I can now.
And I don't want to grow old and regret the things that I didn't do when I still had the chance.
But at the same time, I don't want to be so consumed by training that I will miss the things that are happening in front of me.
The things that truly mattered.
My son is now six. My daughter is turning two.
They're growing up faster than I can process.
Every hour on the trail is an hour not at home.
An hour away from them.
And yet, if I won't do it now, my body won't let me later.
This is my only window.
Is this fear talking? Or just biology?
Last weekend, I was supposed to do back-to-back hard workouts on Saturday and Sunday. Instead of splitting it evenly, I made Saturday hard, deliberately.
More time on feet.
More mileage.
More elevation.
I pushed a little more so I could free up Sunday.
Because I wanted that day with my family.
So on Sunday, after a hard day, barely six hours of sleep, and with tired legs, I took my son out on a hike, which I promised him weeks ago.
Later that day, spent time with my daughter and wife.
That morning, during our ascent to Good Shepherd, he was full of energy.
Smiling and running.
Talking to the camera as if he had a YouTube channel.
Meanwhile, I could feel tightness in my calves and Achilles.
I had to be careful.
I didn't want to push too hard and turn a good day into an injury. But I also didn't want to hold back so much that I couldn’t keep up with him.
I tried to find that middle ground.
Run the downhills.
Slow down and walk the uphills.
Have fun.
Keep going.
And somewhere between the fatigue and tight Achilles, I realized that maybe this is what I'm really training for.
Not just the races.
Not just the miles.
Not just to see how far or fast I can go.
I'm training because I want to stay capable for as long as I can.
I want to be strong enough to keep up with my kids.
Because one day, the miles will get slower.
The climbs will get harder.
The body won't recover the way it does now.
And my kids will grow up.
So maybe trusting the process isn't just about trusting that the training will eventually make me stronger. Maybe it's also about understanding that time is part of the process.
Put in the work and be patient.
I want to get stronger.
I want to keep running.
I want to chase the things that scare me.
But I also want to be there when my son runs ahead, and I have to catch up.
For the days when my daughter is still small enough to carry.
Because I'm not only running out of time as an athlete,
I'm running out of time with them being this age.
And I don't want to regret either.
