03/08/2025
5 Painful Truths About Relationships
1. Just because you feel the other person is your soulmate doesn’t make it true.
Ask yourself: Can I be happy without them?
Because if you enter a relationship feeling incomplete or insecure, you will carry that same emptiness into the relationship. A relationship is not a cure for your personal struggles. Make sure you're addressing your wounds, not using love as a distraction from them.
2. Anyone can say sweet words and do sweet things but that doesn’t mean they’re qualified to be your partner.
It’s easy to say, “I’ve never met anyone like you.” It’s easy to pick you up from work, plan a cute date, or buy gifts. But none of that guarantees emotional maturity or long-term compatibility. A real relationship isn’t about how strong the spark is, it’s about how well you can grow and navigate life together as a team when things get tough.
3. If you're always the one making plans, it’s a sign you might be the only one invested.
If the effort stops after the first few dates and you're left doing all the work, take that as a sign to stop, not as a challenge to try harder. You deserve reciprocity, not confusion. Be honest with yourself: if someone truly wants to be in your life, it will show. If it doesn’t, don’t beg for clarity. Accept the distance and coldness as your answer.
4. When someone uses stress as an excuse to be rude, disrespectful, or dismissive, you’re in for a cycle of unresolved conflict.
Everyone gets stressed but stress is not a license to mistreat the people we love. A healthy relationship involves co-regulation, where both partners support, not harm, each other. You’re not their emotional punching bag. If they keep projecting their stress onto you without accountability, it’s time to raise those boundaries and protect your peace. You’re allowed to walk away from someone who refuses to learn how to self-regulate.
5. Loving someone does not mean sacrificing yourself. You’re a human being, too.
Yes, compromise is part of any relationship but there’s a difference between compromise and completely disregarding your needs. Your needs matter just as much as your partner’s. If you constantly have to adjust and forget about yourself to make things work, maybe it’s not supposed to work. Some relationships are beautiful lessons, not lifelong commitments. And that’s okay.
Your greatest project is not another person, it’s you. A relationship should be a bonus to your life, not the entire definition of it.
