05/06/2025
โ๐๐๐ฒ๐๐ ๐ ๐ฐ๐๐ฌ ๐๐๐ฏ๐๐ซ ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ข๐ซ ๐๐จ๐ซ๐จ๐ญ๐ก๐๐ ๐๐ง๐โฆ ๐ฐ๐๐ฌโฆ ๐๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ญ ๐ ๐๐๐ฌ๐ฌ๐ข๐ง๐ ๐๐๐๐ง๐โ
โItโs never too late to come back to my side, the stars in your eyes shined brighter in Tupelo...โ
- Dorothea by Taylor Swift
If youโve ever scrolled through TikTok at 2 a.m., youโve seen those videos. The ones with grainy filters, a soft song playing in the background, and a caption or a voice over like โon my silent days, I miss my Dorothea a little louder." For that very moment, you think of your Dorothea, the one who drifted away but still lives somewhere in your memory.
Though, what if YOU ARE not the one missing someone?
What if YOU ARE the one being missed...from a distance?๏ฟฝ
What if YOU ARE just everyoneโs passing friend and not a Dorothea?
Iโve started to notice a pattern in my life. People enter my world, and for a moment, it feels real. We talk late into the night. We laugh until our stomachs hurt. We call and do nothing. We make plans for a future weโre certain will include each other. Though slowly, things fade. Texts go unanswered. Plans fall through. Greeting each other a hapoy birthday are just the present convos. Then before I know it, Iโm just another old story, another contact buried in someoneโs phone.
It leaves me wondering: Am I hard to befriend? Or am I just the temporary one? Iโm not a perfect person. I make tons of mistakesโmore than Iโd like to admit. Every friendship Iโve ever had, whether itโs within my family or with someone I once called my best friend, has come with its share of missteps. Words I shouldnโt have said. Times I shouldโve been more present. Things I wish I could go back and do differently.
We shared joy, but we canโt deny the fact that we also shared MISTAKES. The kind that hurt without meaning to. The kind that slowly unravel bonds.
Which results to me thinking: Are these just the natural growing pains of life? Or is the universe quietly telling me that Iโm always the bad one? That Iโm the common denominator. That I love too hard, or not enough. That I try too much, or PULL AWAY too soon. Itโs not about being popular. Itโs about being CHOSEN. Not about being the prioritized friend. Itโs about STAYING. Not because they have to. But because they want to. Though every time no one does, you start to wonder if the role you were born to play is the one in the background. The one who gets remembered fondly but not kept around.
Life is long and life is short. Some days, it feels like thereโs still all the time in the world to find your people. Other days, it feels like that time has already passed and maybe they already found theirs.
Maybe friend just arenโt for me.
Maybe a shoulder to cry on isnโt something I get to keep.
Or maybeโฆ I just havenโt made it to that part of
my story yet.
If youโve ever felt like the friend who gets left behind, like the temporary chapter in someone elseโs novelโI see you. Youโre not alone. Youโre not broken. Youโre not unworthy. Maybe being someoneโs Dorothea means you were the light they needed for a little while. Maybe you werenโt meant to stay. But maybe, someday, someone will see your light and refuse to let it fade. That when they do, I hope they stay. It is because you deserve that. We all do.
Caption: Kish Anne B. Dolo
Illustration: Jamilah Faith E. Quezon
