12/10/2025
An Open Letter to My Isabella Nabi! 🥰
Hi Anak,
The picture above was taken in October 2021. Baka hindi mo na ako marecognize diyan kasi Mommy doesn’t look the same anymore. Pero yes, that was one of the moments when Mommy was at her prime. Bold, fierce, careless, and living the best out of everything she’s given. She was free, adventurous, and amazing.
That time, I didn’t know your Daddy yet. Wala ka pa rin sa plano ni Mommy noon. I’m writing this para malaman mo na nung dumating ka, ang daming nagbago. Sa katawan ko… sa glow ko, sa itsura ko, at sa confidence ko. Pero do take note that you are my proudest moment ever!
Looking at myself now: Mommy’s perky boobs? Hindi na sila gaya dati. Yung medyo flawless skin ni Mommy, nagkaroon ng mga marks and scars na nagdevelop sa sensitivity ng balat ko habang naglilihi ako sayo. I gained so much weight, and halos 30% of my confidence is nowhere to be found kasi hindi na kasya mga damit ko. Yung iba, kailangan ko na talagang ipamigay. Minsan, nakakalimutin na din si Mommy l, hindi na kasing sharp mag-isip gaya dati. Medyo humina na ata ang brain. 😂
Pero yung picture sa baba, taken October 2025, shows a Mommy na walang kahit anong pagsisisi. Kahit madami nang nagbago, I don’t feel any regret. Being close to you is more than enough. Ang dami ko sanang pwedeng gawin o habulin na opportunities sa labas, pero hinayaan ko na lang lumipad kasi hindi ko naramdamang need pa sila ipursue.
Habang sinusulat ko ‘to, tinitingnan kita, Anak. Iniisip ko, ano kaya ang buhay ko kung wala ka? Baka hanggang ngayon, party-party pa rin ako sa Palace, Revel, Xylo, or Yes Please nagpa-party hanggang madaling araw? O baka nagfi feeling lang sa Molito or ATC Alabang habang kumakain ng truffle fries, quesadillas, habang nag-si-sip ng Long Island. Baka ang shallow ng buhay ko, like randomly catching up with friends or attending content creator events kung pinagpatuloy ko yung content creation life. Medyo nababawan na ako sa road nung iniisip ko kase more on self desires na lang sya.
Today, kahit wala ako sa siyudad, may magandang trabaho si mommy, with international rate pa. I get to spend time with you and our family kasama si Lolo at Lola at mga Titos and Titas mo sa bahay. Lahat ng kailangan mo, nabibigay ko. At si Daddy? He’s doing his absolute best para maging maayos at komportable buhay natin. And we are comfortable, Anak, kahit minsan si Mommy pagod or may challenges. We’re getting by!
Gusto kong balikan mo ‘to pag medyo malaki ka na, para malaman mo na naging buo at masaya si Mommy nung dumating ka. You gave me a different kind of light and purpose. Akala ko dati tapos na ‘yung “fun” phase ko, pero dumating ka, and I realized, iba pala ‘tong klase ng happiness.
Ngayon, para sa’yo na mga pangarap ko. Huwag mong maramdaman na may mga nagbago kay Mommy dahil sa’yo, kasi hindi mo kasalanan ‘yon. I refuse to lose my pink, and I’ll always treasure the scar you gave me — especially yung CS scar ko at yung 15 hours na halos mamatay si Mommy para lang mailabas ka. ❤️
Wala akong pinagsisisihan, Anak. Na-enjoy ko ang buhay ko sobra in my early 20s. You and your future sibling, kayo lang ang kailangan ko, namin ni Daddy. Maybe someday, when you’re both grown up, we’ll walk together through Mommy’s old life as a family. If only you knew how inspired I am to thrive and give you the life you deserve. Dati, lagi kong sinasabi, “ayoko magka-anak,” pero the moment narinig ko ‘yung heartbeat mo, everything changed. I felt a love that’s unconditional, pure, and genuine and something na hinding-hindi ko ipagpapalit.
Mahal kita, Isabella Nabi ko. Thank you for giving Mommy a great sense of purpose in life. I love you, mahal na mahal kita, Anak. ❤️
