20/03/2026
It Only Works Until It Doesn't
At the back of our 8-year-old car, thereās a third-row seat that can be lifted up and down. Last week, my daughter asked if she could sit in the back. I said yes and told her Iād bring the seat down the next time we use the car.
While waiting to fetch her from school, I went to the back of the car and tried to bring down the third-row seat. To my surprise, I couldnāt lock it to the floor. I realized that I didnāt really know how the mechanism worked. Whenever someone sat at the back before, I just let them figure it out on their own. I didnāt bother learning how it worked.
I checked the locks and tried different ways to secure the seat, but failed. I knew how to unlock it from the floor, but I couldnāt lock it back down.
Then I checked the other seat and noticed that one side of the mechanism looked different. I pushed down the locking part and, stupidly, I ended up locking the other seat too. Now, I couldnāt lock down both seats.
I got frustrated. I even grabbed a metal bar. Despite the risk of damaging the mechanism, I tried to force it open. After an hour, wearing a sweat-soaked shirt, frustrated, and muttering a lot of censored words, I gave up.
When I picked up my daughter, I told her I still didnāt know how to bring the seat down but Iād try again next time. She was a bit sad but she said it was okay.
A few months later, the problem came to mind again. This time, I decided to check the manual and search online. I watched a few videos on how the third-row seat worked. I kept searching, but I couldnāt find a clear guide on how to unlock the mechanism. It was frustrating so I decided to take a break.
Before heading out, I told myself Iād watch one last video. It was a simple clip explaining how the seat worked. It seemed basic so I turned off my phone and went to the gym.
While running on the treadmill, something clicked. I realized that I already knew how to unlock the seat from the floor and maybe the same process applied to the locking mechanism. Looking back, it felt silly that I didnāt think of it sooner.
After my workout, I went straight to the car. And sure enough, all I had to do was pull the strap. Everything unlocked and I was finally able to secure the seat properly.
In life, there are things we take for granted. As long as weāre not affected, as long as everything seems fine, we stick to the status quo. We push things aside and leave them in the background until we actually need them.
The problem is, that only works until it doesnāt.
When things break down, we panic. We try to fix them by forcing solutions, by reacting with frustration, sometimes even with hurtful words. And when nothing works, we give up.
If youāre lucky, the problem simply remains unsolved. But more often than not, you end up making it worse and in many cases, relationships get damaged.
In my case, I was lucky I didnāt break anything in the car when I used that metal bar.
Looking back, the solution was simple. I just needed to slow down, think clearly, and understand how things actually worked.
Not everything needs force. Not everything needs frustration.
Sometimes, instead of using a metal bar, you just need to pull the strap.
