31/01/2023
A 1st Wife's Tale
When I first married my husband I knew that he wanted polygyny and I was thinking to my self if Allāh has made it halal, who am I to hate it or to not accept it. Years went by with only the two of us. We lived our life like a normal couple, and honestly I’ve forgotten that he ever mentioned it. Until one day he came home, sat me down and wanted a conversation. My heart dropped “what does he want to talk to me about?”
He wanted to remarry! I am a woman, my heart started aching and my thoughts was drowning in my head, “what if this is going to happen? What if he will love her more than me?” but I accepted like I did before I married him. And we agreed on me helping him. One day a sister msgd me, and asked if I was still looking for a wife for my husband, and I started talking about it with her.
Days went by, and I invited her to our home for her to have a conversation with my husband while I was there. While we sat there, of course I felt the jealousy - and I just sat there and seeking refuge in Allaah from shaitan. I knew it was a trick from shaitan.
His first question to me after the sister left was: “what are your thoughts about this and her? I said: “if this is really what you want, then do it - I can feel the jealousy now that is coming close, but I swear by Allah I support you and your happiness.”
They got married, and now I had to be strong and live with the thought that when he wasn’t at my house, he was at her house - so I invited sisters over to overcome my loneliness
My husband wanted us to become close friends with no hatred between us. As she was I convert, I started to invite her over for Eid, and for sleepovers and my feelings suddenly changed, I was really happy for him and her from my heart, wallahi I’ve felt a happiness in my heart I haven’t felt for years.
I swear by Allaah our marriage was the best when he married a 2nd wife. I did this only fesabilillah to see my husband happy, and to attain his goals in life. Wallahi I know the thought of it can be hard dealing with, but if you can live in it is is one of the best things you can do for your marriage.
CTTO