04/26/2025
Tonight, I found a journal entry from May 7, 2013.
āHere I am.
Filthy and broken, offering my life to the God of the universe, begging Him to make it into something beautiful.ā
(Iām almost positive this is a quote from Redeeming Love by Katie Davis)
I wrote that 34 days after my assault.
Just a girlā¦gosh I really was just a young girlā¦clinging to scraps of faith, trying to believe there was still something worth saving.
Reading it now, I see her.
The absolute wreckage, the rage, the wreckless prayers.
I hurt people. I burned bridges.
If I was the villain in your story, Iām sorry.
I was bleeding from wounds you couldnāt see, and I didnāt know how to fix it.
But even then, I laid it all down at His feetā¦
the bad decisions, the anger, the shame.
It wasnāt pretty.
It wasnāt some neat testimony.
It was bloody and broken and real.
And still, God didnāt flinch.
He took the ruins I handed Him, and He started to build something.
Iām proud of my story.
I was wrecked by a manās choice.
But I was rescued by a Saviorās love.
And I still come, beggingā¦
Make something beautiful out of me.
