09/06/2025
I wasn’t looking for a caregiver—I just wanted my old life back. When the doctor said, “You’ll never walk again,” I didn’t cry. I nodded, like hearing the weather: permanent paralysis. I didn’t want sympathy or food deliveries. I wanted room to grieve something deeper than movement or freedom. The hospital offered part-time help. I refused, saying, “I’ve got this.” But I didn’t. The kitchen felt like a maze, showers became battles. I dropped a spoon and gave up. Then Saara appeared.
I expected someone older and softer. Instead, she was confident and no-nonsense, like she belonged there. At first, I disliked her. No small talk or smiles—just help, leave, repeat. Gradually, things changed. She made bad jokes, and I pretended not to laugh. I saved newspaper clippings I thought she’d enjoy and asked her about books I acted indifferent toward.
One day, I dropped a bowl, shattered it, and sat on the floor, angry and ashamed. Saara didn’t clean it up. She sat quietly and said, “It’s not about the bowl, is it?” And I broke.
I didn’t want help, but Saara made me feel alive again. Needing support wasn’t defeat. Yesterday, after fluffing my pillow, she said, “I need to tell you something.” My heart fluttered, unsure what was coming. (check in the first comment👇