A Kosmidis Joint

09/19/2025

In Boston way too early. Sitting in the cafeteria with coffee, waiting for my eye appointment. Getting the stitches out from my corneal transplant today and my vision is sharper than ever.

Put it to use on my new drawing and notes tablet, XP Pen Magic Notepad. Game changer. This penguin with bats feels like it flew out of a gothic story.

07/01/2025

Save the dates for our annual festival! What new items would you like to see? Let us know!

06/23/2025

Monday morning, 9 AM, and starting the week right.
Freddo cappuccino in my 'Everyday is Halloween' cup, a good classic book, and some chill company from my reading elephant.
Waiting on my weekly class updates to hit and get to work.
Wishing everyone a great start to their week!

06/17/2025

Books For When The Tile Is Too Bright And The Mirror Is Watching You Too Closely

The Mirror Knows Too Much

Every morning begins in your bathroom. The tile is usually too bright from the sterile lights. The mirror? It knows too much. You wake to the smell of clean, the cold gleam of either hardwood or tiles underfoot. Your mind is not yet fully present. You plan your day in fragments, dissociating a bit before your brain finally stirs, trying to remember what needs to be done before the day can actually begin. This space is quiet but feels like the fragile brink of sanity before the world fully lands on you again.

If you have ever felt this kind of morning, like a dull panic mixed with numbness, these books might speak to you. They are definitely not comfort reads. They do not promise answers to life, the universe, and everything, or give you easy relief. Instead, they mirror the isolation, that early morning fear, those looping thoughts of a mind trying to hold itself together on the edge of something unknowable.

This list is a companion for the moments when reality feels like a tiled room with a vanishing door. It echoes my own story, The Door Finally Closes, about existential dread and psychosis, which you can find linked at the end. These books carry both the texture and the theme of that space:
Sterile. Repetitive. And Quietly Terrifying.

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Echoes of the Threshold: Fiction That Holds the Mind in Its Grip

1. A Short Stay in Hell – Steven L. Peck
I read this while traveling through Greece, and it hit like a ton of bricks after hitting terminal velocity. There is eternity, and there is eternity. Imagine an existence of repetition with no escape, and the sudden realization that you are already past your knees and just shy of waist-deep in the midst of a mid-life reckoning you swore would never touch you. I am pushing 40 and managing this crisis quite well, thank you very much. Which is reassuring or quite horrifying depending on the time of day. Peck’s novel is a frank, almost clinical exploration of what it means to be trapped in the same moment, over and over, unable to move forward. It’s the literary equivalent of staring at a spotless bathroom wall while your mind slowly fractures and comes apart. This book truly cracked something open inside of me I did not know was even sealed.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/098374842X/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_apa_gl_i_5JKM43VS3FEA4BEW7PWG?linkCode=ml1&tag=koz152-20

2. Slaughterhouse-Five – Kurt Vonnegut
Discovering Vonnegut’s masterpiece around my late teens, maybe 20, was something that may have slowly shifted my thinking over time. I was already hooked by sci-fi elements already in the novel. Elements like time travel, extraterrestrials, and the nonlinear narration. The book itself distorts time and shows you sanity in a way that echoes the disorientation of waking unprepared, stare into the mirror, and face the unknown day. That overall complete absurdity of existence, the hollow pain masked by the morbidly dark humor, along with the invisible scars left behind, all reflect the quiet panic beneath a calm surface. After about my 20th re-read, yes, it is my favorite book, I realized it is not about war or time travel. It is about life being an absurd and brutal sequence of problems everyone is trying to navigate for the first time. We live; we die. That is literally and even figuratively it. The movie adaptation, by the way, is fantastic.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/0385333846/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_apa_gl_i_FP7YABR4ZJ3E04C62QB5?linkCode=ml1&tag=koz152-20

3. The Descent – Jeff Long
Reading this just a few weeks ago after discovering it through a Reddit post, I am still trying to get through the sequel, Deeper, but an accelerated Children’s Literature, Algebra, and Human Nutrition courses have taken up most of my time. Claustrophobia and lost meaning take shape in this terrifying journey beneath the earth. The book pulled me down into thoughts about the age of the earth, the actual brief timeline of man, and just how forgettable our species truly is. We are a blink. Who truly knows what came before us? The sterile bathroom might be your surface reality, but Long’s story descends into the dark, the unknown, where terror and imagined theology twist your grip on sanity. I am not claustrophobic, but I will most definitely not be spelunking anytime soon. This one lingers.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00SCVBNVO/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_apa_gl_i_0BAV8HWQ00HHPBD11XJW?linkCode=ml1&tag=koz152-20

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The Mirror’s Reflection: Nonfiction That Peels Back the Mind

4. The Denial of Death – Ernest Becker
We Fear Death. That sentence should be enough to explain this book. Human behavior is shaped by the fear of mortality. Becker exposes the deep lie of false comfort. We may be the only animal that is actually and totally conscious of our inevitable end, understanding the psychoanalysis of it all pushed the foundation of Freud. The sterile tile of your morning hides the primal terror we all deny, and this book forces you to confront it without illusions. Anxiety over death is natural.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/0684832402/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_apa_gl_i_MJPA9HY0X446H0D9N5AP?linkCode=ml1&tag=koz152-20

5. Hallucinations – Oliver Sacks
Calm, clinical, and deeply unsettling and not even fiction. Sacks explores the mind’s distortions, hearing, smelling, seeing, and feeling things that are not truly there, with a matter-of-fact tone that makes your own slipping reality feel less isolated but somewhat less strange. It’s a quiet mirror to the fragile edge where perception breaks. It is just the fan or the pipes. The light flickered. It is just your normal morning routine.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1447208269/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_apa_gl_i_SH35SM2QWWC8F7MJA39D?linkCode=ml1&tag=koz152-20
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False Comforts: Books That Seem Safe Until They Aren’t

6. The Little Prince – Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
As a child reading this book that scratches at the darkness underneath, you learn gentle sadness disguised in something fit for young readers. This book feels gentle but delivers a slow burn of grief and loneliness disguised as innocence. It’s nostalgia with a razor edge as you shave while focusing on the mirror.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/9357401946/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_apa_gl_i_GRXTY35EDGWJMQGSH59A?linkCode=ml1&tag=koz152-20

7. The Road – Cormac McCarthy
I will never forget The Road. A bleak journey through a dying world that tore me open. The road is endless sadness and death made concrete and quite solid, giving the opposite of false hope. It’s a slow, brutal reflection of the quiet horror beneath your cold and hard tiled floor. The movie adaptation with Mortensen did the role justice in his own quiet way. Love, death, survival, and that dull yet brutal ache when everything around you is neither black nor white, it is all just gray. The book is a reminder of that grief that needs no words. It just needs to be witnessed and experienced.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B011T7J91S/ref=cm_sw_r_as_gl_apa_gl_i_BFTCE43YZ59PWNYKV2JV?linkCode=ml1&tag=koz152-20

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Final Thoughts

No one really knows what’s coming next. Not the priest you confess to, not some stranger on TV with a big jet, and not even the man who promised us eternity and died for us. We’re, mostly, all brushing our teeth in the morning, trying to remember something important on our to-do list but lost in the brightness of the sterile light. If you find a book here that makes that moment feel less alone or at least more honest read it.

Then do what feels right.

Story Link: ‘The Door Finally Closes’
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/door-finally-closes-alexandros-kosmidis-ezjge

This article has affiliate links meaning if you buy something I might earn a penny for every other dollar you spend. You do not pay any extra. I will only link to things I have actually read, used, or liked. If I ever mention something terrible, it is just to help you avoid it. Think of it as helping me afford half a coffee from the weird convenience store with the cat laying on the bread.

A Kosmidis Joint on IG!

06/13/2025

Who needs bad omens when you've got historical grievances setting the vibe?

Our ancestors really put in the work to make sure this day still feels a little... spooky.

What plans are you "wisely" rescheduling today? Or are you just leaning into the chaos? 👇 I prefer chaos!

(the old kind)

06/13/2025

Is this regional or a store exclusive?

06/08/2025

You know that feeling?

You head to the thrift store with one mission (mine was a cheap, working VCR, because yes, I'm digitizing VHS tapes now, don't ask...yet).
And then... I see the book section. Cue dramatic lighting and angelic choirs.

Naturally, mission for a VCR was momentarily derailed by a barely-used gem: a Scholastic version of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone and a really great desk shelf storage thing.

Priorities, right?

Speaking of seeing things, my vision is slowly (very slowly!) adjusting after I had a corneal transplant on May 27th at Mass Eye and Ear.

Apparently, having a 'zombie eye' from a donor is less about Dawn of the Dead and more about adjusting to the dawn early light not finally hurting. Everything is still a bit blurry, but hey, I'm now seeing one blurry thing instead of eight so a win is a win!

That surgery was a wild ride, 2 hours drugged but awake and aware trying to disassociate while doctors chatted, poked and prodded, and they listened to Spotify.

Good times.

Crazy last few weeks. Started taking accelerated Summer classes (my math test 3 days after surgery was so effing hard, using the really good SunShields sunglasses from my doctor and my phone's camera to to see my laptop screen without hurting my eyes) and made the Dean's List for the Spring semester (turns out getting an ADHD diagnosis at 39 helps balance things better!).

But between all the eye drops and school assignments, there's always time for a great book find.

Next week, it's a wedding in upstate NY (family and friends in Upstate I will be there 3 days) with the girlfriend.

And yes, the VCR hunt continues!

What unexpected treasures have you found when you went looking for something completely different?

05/08/2025

Article I published on LinkedIn. Did you know you could publish articles there?

It’s almost Friday morning and you know it is time to unwind from that long week of mundane tasks and whatever else got thrown at you and you handled like a champ. Many of us are in the midst of finals, many are just going through life and need a break, and many just are existing in the world.

05/02/2025

Against all my (weak) warnings, you persevered, you REBEL! 😉

And for that, you deserve all the GOOD vibes this weekend. Enjoy it!

04/05/2025

Got these from from
Got the watermelon. Taste really good.

04/05/2025

Did some Spring cleaning yesterday and found this picture.

03/27/2025

Fueling My Freshman Year
Healthy Snacks for an Almost 40-Year-Old College Student (and 400 lbs. Down!)

Embarking on college at 39, after losing 400 pounds, has been a transformative experience. It's a journey filled with new challenges and discoveries, and one of the most important lessons I've learned is the significance of proper nutrition. I've realized that food isn't just about nourishment. It's about fueling my body and mind to succeed in this new chapter of my life. Below are some tips to help you out.

The Snack Revelation:
My relationship with food was always complex. Years of trauma and unhealthy habits had led to a strained connection with food. Stress eating played a role, but the real issue ran much deeper. I was living with an undiagnosed vitamin deficiency since birth, unknowingly affecting my weight and health. This realization was a major turning point in my life. The irony was the world was slowing down during the pandemic while I was finally ramping up.

The Protein Connection:
Working closely with my bariatric endocrinologist, I began to understand the importance of providing my body with the right fuel. He explained that my body is like a high-performance machine, think Buick Grand National, that needs the proper fuel and maintenance to operate at its peak. This new perspective finally transformed how I viewed food. I shifted my focus from restriction and cheating myself to nourishing my body with the nutrients it needed to function at its best and learning to treat myself.

Snacking as a "Mature" Student:
More Than Just Calories
As an older student, with 20 years of life experience more than many of my academic colleagues, my approach to snacking drastically differs from that of traditional college students. I have learned I need to be mindful of my body's unique needs and fuel it accordingly and also, I have learned to schedule snack breaks throughout the day, treating them as important as my study sessions. This helps me maintain consistent energy levels and prevents me from reaching for unhealthy options when I'm feeling sluggish.

The Freshman 15 (and Beyond):
Avoiding the Pitfalls
The Freshman 15 is a real phenomenon for many younger college students and some older ones. It’s easy to fall into the trap of unhealthy eating habits in between classes, studying, and the brief moments where you can have some semblance of a social life. The abundance of fast-food options and late-night study sessions can make it challenging to maintain a healthy proper diet. I've learned that moderation is key. A slice or two of pizza or a few chocolates occasionally won't derail my own progress, but it's important to avoid overindulging. Two slices and a can of soda is fine, a whole pizza and a 2 liter soda is not.

Snacks for Success:
Fueling My Academic Journey
Protein-rich snacks have become my secret weapon for success. They help by providing me with sustained energy throughout the day, staying full longer, and helping me stay focused during lectures and study sessions. I've noticed a significant improvement in my concentration and overall performance since incorporating these snacks into my diet in the recent years. It's a testament to the power of proper nutrition in supporting my academic goals. Trust your gut.

Budget-Friendly Snacking:
Making Healthy Choices Affordable
College life can be expensive, and financial aid sometimes isn’t enough. It is important to be mindful of your budget and your wallet. Utilizing all the resources available to you, like college food pantries and local free meals, is a valuable resource for students facing financial challenges. I encourage anyone who needs assistance to take advantage of these resources. Additionally, buying in bulk can help you save money on healthy snacks. My Amazon list includes many affordable and nutritious options that won't break the bank. My favorite are the Dark Chocolate Almonds which come out to about $0.40 an ounce - https://amzn.to/4c94Ncc

My Top 3 Snack Picks (From My Amazon List): A Caffeine Kick, Protein Boost, and a Sweet Treat

Nespresso Pods: College life often involves late-night study sessions, and I've found that a good cup of coffee is essential for staying focused and energized. Nespresso pods have become my go-to for a quick and delicious caffeine boost. - https://amzn.to/3DYwuI2

Jack Link's Peppered Jerky: Convenience is key when you're juggling classes and a busy schedule. Jack Link's Peppered Jerky provides a convenient source of protein and satisfies my cravings between meals. It's a perfect on-the-go snack that keeps me fueled and ready to tackle the next challenge. - https://amzn.to/3Xzq5K6

Kinder Bueno Minis: Let's be honest, sometimes you need a little sweetness. Kinder Bueno Minis provide a satisfying treat without derailing my progress. I practice moderation, savoring each bite mindfully. - https://amzn.to/4hN2v3y

My Go-To Quick Meal:
A Microwave Omelet
As a busy student, a quick and easy meal option is always the best, especially when they are both nutritious and delicious. My go-to meal is a simple microwave omelet. I start by adding a few drops of olive oil to a microwave-safe bowl and swirling it around to coat the bottom and sides. Then, I crack an egg into the bowl and season it with salt, pepper, oregano, and a pinch of garlic powder. Use your favorite seasoning, add some paprika, sazon, or adobo. After whisking the egg, I add a handful or two, it will wilt down to nothing, of baby spinach and a few slices of shredded cheddar cheese. I cover the bowl and microwave it in 30-second intervals, checking on it frequently. Let it sit after you microwave it as the egg is basically a ticking time bomb if you overcooked it and the bowl is extremely hot. It's a quick and easy way to get a healthy and satisfying meal without spending a lot of time in the kitchen.

Curbing Cravings:
Finding Healthy Alternatives
There are always healthier alternatives to satisfy your cravings. It's about making better and conscious choices while finding ways to enjoy food without compromising your goals. I've discovered that exploring new and healthier options and ingredients I have never thought to try has been a rewarding part of my journey. It's about finding what works for you and creating a sustainable approach to eating that supports your overall health and well-being.

Baked Potatoes and Homemade Nuts:
Simple and Delicious
I love baked potatoes and baked sweet potatoes. They're a simple yet satisfying meal. My preferred method is to drizzle olive oil and seasonings on a potato, wrap it in plastic wrap, and microwave it until tender. Let it rest for a few minutes before unwrapping to avoid burns. For a quick and easy snack, I like to make my own seasoned nuts. I toss plain nuts with olive oil and seasonings, then bake or roast them until crispy. It's a simple and delicious way to add variety and flavor to my snacking routine.

Hydration and Grazing:
Finding What Works
I'm a fan of zero-sugar cola. It's not the healthiest option, but I enjoy it in moderation. I'm also a grazer. I've found that consistent snacking throughout the day helps me maintain those needed stable energy levels and prevents me from getting overly hungry throughout the day. I've learned to listen to my body's cues and snack when I feel the need. Like before, trust your gut.

My Relationship with Food:
Advice to My Younger Self:
Embrace the Journey
There are always better options available. Explore and discover new and healthier snacks. You don't need to eat the whole bag or box. Practice moderation and enjoy the journey of finding what works best for you. Remember, it's about creating a sustainable approach to eating that supports your overall well-being.

Check out my Amazon list for some of my favorite healthy snacks: https://amzn.to/4hTrzGa
What are your go-to study snacks? Share your tips and recommendation.

Shop recommended products from AKosmidisJoint on www.amazon.com. Learn more about AKosmidisJoint's favorite products.