One Percent News Network

02/05/2017

05/13/2016

Most media outlets pretend to care about average Americans. We don't pretend.

One Percent News is the first news source exclusively of, by and for America's One Percent. http://www.OnePercentNews.com

09/14/2015

We hope that Donald Trump will not be offended this time. Yes, he left out of this report. But c'mon, it's about the GOP Kiddie Table debate, which is basically only for candidates that are a complete joke. One Percent News does not see Donal Trump as a complete joke.

Since receiving a threatening letter from Mr. Trump, and after our anchor woman Margaret Theismann was followed by his deranged lawyer, the producers at One Percent News made the editorial decision to limit our coverage of the 2016 GOP primary race to stories that are gushingly favorable and entirely focused on Mr. Trump. This is our first story since we received that suspicious package with blood leaking from the bottom that does not include him. We hope he will forgive us. Donald, if you are reading this, please forgive us. If you don't like this story, we will go back to focusing our news department entirely upon you. No need to send that gigantic body guard after us. Thank you.

08/13/2015

One Percent News Network is releasing this footage willingly, and not because Mr. threatened to never appear on our network again, and not because he threatened Will Rice, Margaret Theismann and other members of our news team.

08/12/2015

The producers of the One Percent News would like to apologize to Donald Trump for omitting two of his supporters from our report on the Republican debate held in Cleveland, OH on Aug. 6, 2015. We did not in any way mean to imply that Trump has no supporters, or, that the eleven Jeb Bush staffers that we did include is a fair representation of "everyone" who attended the debate.

We are releasing this footage willingly, and not because Mr. Trump threatened to never appear on our network again, and not because he threatened Will Rice, Margaret Theismann and other members of our news team.

The truth is, we are starting to come to terms with the fact that, no matter the rest of the 1% wants, the world's most famous One Percenter might actually be our 2016 nominee. While we would greatly prefer to have a candidate that is less wealthy, and thus more beholden on our campaign donations, we are reserving judgement as to whether or not Mr. Trump would make a good president. Does the risk of a third world war outweigh our personal preference for lower taxes? That is a debate One Percent News will bring to you during the general election.

In the future we hope that our reporting does not offend Donald Trump or his supporters. But we will focus on the narrow interests of the One Percent without fear, and continue to feign objectivity as we do so. Please forgive us, Mr. Trump. And tell us when Will and Margaret can come out of hiding.

08/10/2015

"If you're going to have your 1st amendment rights violated isn't it good to have a nice soundtrack to go with it?" 1% News' Will Rice, to blocked GOP debate protesters.

08/07/2015

Riot Police Turn Back Protesters at GOP Debate

Cleveland, OH — Shortly before the first Republican debate was to begin, a group of about two dozen protesters was blocked as they walked away from the Quicken Arena where the debate was being held.

The tense atmosphere of the standoff was eased by snappy jazz music, and by Will Rice of the One Percent News Network, who specializes in exposing democracy extremist activities.

www.OnePercentNews.com • video by Eric Byler

08/06/2015

One Percent News is on the road to Cleveland for the big debate! Watch as ace reporter Will Rice discovers the oddities of 99% travel: traffic jams, steering wheels, and big houses along the side of the road with free bathrooms.

07/24/2015

First in a new series of intimate sessions with One Percent News ace reporter Will Rice, relaxing at home and discussing the One Percent issues of the day (7/24/15).

MORE: http://www.Onepercentnews.com

07/22/2015

What explains the rise of Sen. Bernie Sanders in the polls? We asked 10 avid to explain.

Democracy extremist Bernie Sanders is unaccountably surging in presidential polls. Why all the enthusiasm for a rumpled trouble maker who rejects the high-dollar patronage of the One Percent to seek the impoverished support of average voters? One Percent News hit the streets to find out.

MORE: www.OnePercentNews.com

07/22/2015

What explains Sen. Bernie Sanders' rise in the polls? We asked 10 avid to explain...

http://www.OnePercentNews.com | Democracy extremist Bernie Sanders is unaccountably surging in presidential polls. Why all the enthusiasm for a rumpled troub...

07/20/2015

The real meaning of 's "We are running for president."

Charles and David Koch join presidential candidate Scott Walker on stage moments after the historic announcement that a sitting governor, and his two most prominent financial backers, are running for president together. Analysts say that the Supreme Court's "Citizens United" decision cleared the way for this unprecedented campaign by opening the door to unlimited money to influence elections.

One Percent News is not endorsing any candidate at this point, but we do like Scott Walker's style, and we endorse the way he arrives at policy positions — by selling the authorship of his ideas to the highest bidder.